Managing Former Peers? Have These 4 Conversations First (Ep 324)

Six months ago you sat next to these people. You complained about leadership together, covered for each other when something slipped, and knew exactly what got said in the hallway versus in the meeting. Now you run the team, and every one of those unspoken rules is up for renegotiation. Most new managers handle this by saying nothing and hoping the awkwardness fades. Ramona did exactly that after her promotion into leadership. Within two years, she had damaged some of those relationships and felt more stressed than she ever had as an individual contributor.In this episode, Ramona walks through the conversations she wishes she had opened with, and why the manager who tries to stay liked ends up losing both the relationship and the team.She covers:The two kinds of expectations that shape every working relationship, and why the unspoken ones do the damageA four-box matrix of management approaches, including the trap that feels the safest and costs the mostThe four things to renegotiate out loud with every former peer in your first two weeksWhat to say to the person on your team who wanted your jobWhy the trust you built as a peer is already banked, and the one question your team still needs answeredWhether you were just promoted over your peers, you can see that promotion coming, or you are two years in and still avoiding the elephant in the room, this episode gives you the words for the conversations you have been putting off.Watch on YouTube: The Manager Track on YouTube: https://youtu.be/LYlESAru-U0— RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE —The Leadership Accelerator (12-week cohort program for new and early-stage managers): archova.org [verify link in show notes]"The Confident & Competent New Manager" by Ramona Shaw, including the explicit vs. implicit expectations framework and the productivity/rapport matrix: archova.org/books or AmazonFree masterclass for new managers: archova.org/masterclassPersonnel psychology research on multiplex workplace relationships (friendship plus reporting line) and maintenance difficultyFiske, Cuddy, and Glick research on warmth and competence in how we assess leaders— LINKS —Schedule a Leadership Strategy Call with Ramona HERE (link: https://calendly.com/ramonashaw/leadership-strategy-session)Grab the free New Manager Toolkit mentioned in the episode: archova.org/freetoolkitsLearn how to turn your 1-on-1 meetings from time wasters, awkward moments, status updates, or non-existent into your most important and valuable meeting with your directs all week. Learn more at: http://archova.org/1on1-courseGrab your copy of Ramona’s best-selling book ‘The Confident & Competent New Manager: How to Rapidly Rise to Success in Your First Leadership Role’: amzn.to/3TuOdcP— OTHER EPISODES YOU MIGHT LIKE —Episode 24 – Can I Be Friends With My Direct Reports? Episode 321 – From Doer to Leader: Redefining Competence in Your New Role — WHAT’S NEXT? —Learn more about our leadership development programs, coaching and workshops at archova.org.Grab your copy of Ramona’s best-selling book ‘The Confident & Competent New Manager: How to Rapidly Rise to Success in Your First Leadership Role’: amzn.to/3TuOdcPWant to better understand your leadership style and patterns? Take our free quiz to discover your Manager Archetype and learn how to play to your strengths and uncover your blind spots: archova.org/quizAre you in your first manager role and don’t want to mess it up? Watch our FREE Masterclass and discover the 4 shifts to become a leader people love to work for: archova.org/masterclassLove the podcast and haven’t left a review yet? All you have to do is go to ramonashaw.com/itunes and to our Spotify Page, and give your honest review. Thanks for your support of this show!If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device and post it to your Instagram Stories, and tag me @ramona.shaw.leadership or DM me on LinkedIn at linkedin.com/in/ramona-shaw* Disclaimer: Shownotes may contain affiliate links. That means that I am awarded a small commission for purchases made through them, at no added cost to you.