Matthew Wrap Up: And Q&A for Chapter 28

Matthew finally ends, and somehow its last 20 verses manage to cram in earthquakes, angels, an empty tomb, bribed guards, resurrected Jesus, doubting apostles, divine authority, the Great Commission, the beginnings of Christian separation from Judaism, and enough theological duct tape to keep church councils busy for centuries.We dig into Matthew 28 and ask the questions that apparently nobody at Sunday school was supposed to ask. If the guards were asleep, how exactly did they know the disciples stole the body? Why does an angel tell the Marys to deliver Jesus’ message only for Jesus himself to immediately show up and repeat it? And most importantly: after miracles, walking on water, healings, resurrection, and Jesus literally standing in front of them after being dead... how are some of the eleven disciples still doubting? Because if eyewitnesses allegedly saw resurrected Jesus and still weren’t convinced, maybe modern atheists deserve a little less shit for wanting evidence.Then things get bigger. We unpack Matthew’s increasingly uncomfortable “us versus the Jews” rhetoric, the lack of contemporary Roman corroboration for the supernatural claims, Jesus declaring that all authority has been given to him, and the Great Commission telling followers to make disciples of “all nations.” That leads us straight into the theological clusterfuck that would eventually become the Trinity... a doctrine the New Testament never actually spells out and later church councils spent centuries trying to hammer into something resembling coherence.Along the way, Wife declares herself God because apparently declaring divine authority is all it takes, Husband gets limited Tuesday-night jurisdiction, Dagny the cat receives emergency theological authority, Douglas Adams and Battlestar Galactica make appearances, and Matthew officially gets kicked out the door.👉 Listen now at sacrilegiousdiscourse.com👉 Join our godless rebellion on Discord: discord.gg/VBnyTYV6nC👉 Support the snark on Patreon: patreon.com/sacrilegiousdiscourse📌 Topics Covered:Matthew 28 resurrection problems: empty tomb ≠ automatic proof somebody rose from the deadAngels, earthquakes, cosmic symbolism, and Matthew’s flair for dramatic storytellingWhy the Roman guards allegedly report to Jewish chief priests—and why their bribery story makes almost no sense“But some doubted”: the apostles somehow witness resurrected Jesus and still aren’t unanimously convincedMatthew’s “the Jews believe this to this day” language and the growing separation between early Jesus-followers and other Jewish communitiesTacitus, Pliny, Suetonius, and what non-Christian Roman sources actually do—and absolutely do not—confirm about JesusThe Great Commission, spreading Christianity to “all nations,” and one of the most consequential commands in Christian historyThe Father, Son, Holy Spirit triadic formula—and how centuries of theological arguments eventually produced the doctrine of the Trinity💬 Best Quote from the Episode:“I read the book of Matthew and it didn’t convince me, and apparently it didn’t fucking convince his disciples either.”Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sacrilegious-discourse-bible-study-for-atheists/donations