Me, mySELF, & EI Part 3 - Understanding 'The Self' with Dr. Zelda Di Blasi - EP162

Hi again & welcome to the series on Emotional Intelligence.As I was putting together the outline of all the areas of focus for this series, it became obvious that before going into self-awareness, self-confidence and all other aspects of ‘self’, it would be valuable to dive into what is ‘self’ in it’s own right. To have self understood first before going further was my goal with this episode.Thanks for John McCarthy, head of Applied Psychology at UCC, I was connected with Dr. Zelda Di Blasi, and we recently recorded this one over zoom, all about ‘Self’.About Dr. Di BlasiDr Zelda Di Blasi, MPsychSc, PhD, CPsychol (BPS) is co-director of the MA in Positive & Coaching Psychology. After completing her Masters in Health Psychology at University College Galway, founded by the Medical Research Council, Zelda completed her PhD/DPhil in Health Sciences at the University of York on the placebo effect and health care interactions.Her interest in Positive Psychology evolved during her Post-Doctorate in Integrative Medicine and Health Psychology, when Zelda worked with Professor Susan Folkman at the University of California San Francisco (UCSF). A that time, she received a Teaching Fellowship  from UCSF and San Francisco State University.In 2006 Zelda took up her appointment as lecturer in the School of Applied Psychology in UCC, and later set up a Masters programme in Positive & Coaching Psychology, which she currently co-directs.Zelda has diplomas in Contemporary Yoga and Modern Dance, and an Advanced Diploma in Personal, Leadership and Executive Coaching accredited by the ICF and the EMCC. She is a certified Health & Wellness Coach with the Institute of Health Sciences, a HeartMath Coach/Mentor, and a Strengths Provider with CAPP (Centre of Applied Positive Psychology).  --During this interview we discussed: Zelda’s background in Psychology and teachingDoing her PhD on the placebo effectHow she discovered her interest for Psychology at the age of 18 and falling in love with the areaZelda’s interest and passion for learning including Yoga, Mindfulness and Modern Dance and how this all connects in with the Mind, Body and SpiritWhat is ‘the self’ and how does it develop?Finding the answer to the question ‘who am I?’How does ‘the self’ influence how we thinkWhen is it formed?Breaking down the self – what is it made up of?The mirror test with a baby to show a sense of self has developedWhy we use it so naturally without thought?Identity v Self – crossovers and comparisonsSelf is more at the marco levelHistory of the self?William James the first professor of psychologySchools of Thought on it?The role of Ego and how it compares to Self?Value of Self-esteem, compassion and empathyEmphasis on self-compassion more than self-esteemThe Self and spiritualityIs Self an Illusion? Or is it real?Ted Talks worth checking out on SelfChristine Neff - The space between self-compassion and self-esteemDaniel Gilbert – Talk on Happiness – affective forecastingBiases that exist on selfthe illusion of transparency – eg presenting and anxious about this – we are over estimating what others see in usthe spotlight effect – eg you feel like you’re on stage and with a spotlight on you – but the fact is people aren’t looking at you in that way – the cool v nerdy t-shirt exampleAffective forecasting – what you think will make you happy or unhappy – turns out we are not very goodDurability bias – how will you feel if you get a promotion at work? How long will this feeling last? Not that long….for some more than othersJust being aware of these biases helps and focusing on the present!How to get a better sense of self in the world we live in now?Tools that you can use to better understand SelfThe Best Possible Self?4 days visualizing what this looks like for you10 mins a dayDo it in a real relaxed spaceConnect with the feelingWhat comes up and what the image is?What your dream or ideal self looks like?Then devise the steps to take to get there!Visualization tools & Vision boardsTaking one small step at a timeThe value of journaling each day helps to learn more about self6 minute journalMorning pages (30mins)The home retreat you have now!Random acts of kindnessWhat Zelda is working on now – the Book on Pleasure!How to Connect in with Zelda – email: [email protected] you’re interested in more details on what was covered in this episode, would like to explore your own Emotional Intelligence deeper, I’d be happy to discuss this further and look at coaching opportunities.Please do get in touch via email at [email protected] or connect in over any of the social channels - @robofthegreen