MOMFESSIONS: Why Our Sons Might Expect Too Much From Women

We’re back with a Momfessions confession that might hit close to home: are we accidentally raising sons who expect too much from women?  I’m joined by my teammate at CARRY Media, Kristen White, a mom of three boys, for a candid conversation about the messages our sons absorb about work, caregiving, and what they should expect from a future partner. Oof. We’re going there. Between the two of us, we’re raising five boys, and this conversation has been brewing in my mind for years: Are we raising sons who expect a partner…or a parent? And listen, this was an uncomfortable conversation for us. It made us examine our own habits, our own assumptions, and the messages we may be sending without even realizing it. But uncomfortable conversations are often the ones we most need to have. Before you come for us, this is NOT a working-mom-VS-stay-at-home-mom debate. It’s something much deeper. What are our sons learning about women from watching us? Are they learning that caregiving belongs to women, or that family life belongs to everyone? They’re watching everything.  We talk about why boys need to see moms with dreams, goals, and identities outside of motherhood, and why they need to see fathers cooking, cleaning, caregiving, and showing up as true partners. Because I don’t want my sons to grow up looking for someone to cook and clean for them. I want them to grow up wanting to build a life alongside someone, not expect someone to carry it all. This one will ruffle some feathers. But that’s what Momfessions is all about. Let’s Talk About It.  Listen in to learn more:  0:01:00] Are We Raising Sons for Partnership or Service? [0:03:39] The Cost of “Automatic” Mothering for Our Sons’ Expectations [0:05:00] Do Boys Learn Caregiving Belongs to Women? [0:07:58] Modeling True Partnership and Domestic Equity at Home [0:10:20] Spousal Equity and Joint Career Decisions in Marriage [0:12:22] Kids Seeing Mom’s Ambition and Dad Tag‑Teaming at Home [0:14:14] Research: How Working Moms Shape Sons’ and Daughters’ Futures [0:16:30] Teaching Kids “See a Need, Meet a Need” as a Family Ethic [0:18:18] Why Engaged Fatherhood Radically Shapes Boys and Girls [0:19:18] Kids Aren’t the Center of the Universe: Healthy Family Priorities In this episode, we are diving into how boys learn to respect and value women by observing their mothers, why moms need personal goals and priorities beyond parenting, the critical role of active fathers, the benefits of strong parenting partnerships, the family motto “see a need, meet a need,” and how shared family responsibilities help raise confident, responsible, and contributing children. Connect with Paula on Instagram  Paula’s Newsletter is on Substack!!  THE CARRY ALL weekly newsletter is on Substack!!  Paula’s Book: You Don’t Have To Carry It All Download the Savor Your Summer Guide HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices