Most Hated Rally in History, Strategy Buys $2.5B BTC, Hormuz Near Zero

Your daily bitcoin and macro intelligence briefing. AI-generated audio from the TFTC Bitcoin Brief newsletter, written and curated by Marty Bent. • Bears are paying 6% annualized to short Bitcoin while it grinds to $78K, up 22% since Iran strikes began Feb 28. 46 straight days of negative funding, the longest streak since the FTX collapse. • The rally has climbed every wall of worry: quantum FUD from BlackRock's IBIT prospectus update, fabricated Epstein-created-Bitcoin emails, and nonstop media shade. The price is the refutation. • Strategy adds 34,164 BTC for $2.54B, its third-largest purchase ever, passing BlackRock as the largest Bitcoin holder at 815,061 BTC. • U.S. spot Bitcoin ETFs pulled in $996M last week with IBIT alone hitting $284M in a single day. • Strait of Hormuz functionally closed: 3 ships in 24 hours vs. the normal 60-80. IRGC firing on vessels. Bessent says Kharg Island storage full in days. • Warsh pledges Fed independence at Senate hearing while Tillis blocks the vote until DOJ drops its Powell investigation. Powell's term expires May 15. • CoinShares projects 70% of listed miner revenue from AI by end of 2026 as miners repurpose power infrastructure. • Trump invokes Defense Production Act for grid and coal infrastructure. Giga Energy, Upstream Data, and Satoshi Energy well positioned with modular data centers, transformers, and gen sets. Get the full written brief with all links, sources, and on-chain data — subscribe free at tftc.io/bitcoin-brief