My Jimmy John’s Bully
from Single Dad Laughing Podcast
Bright white shortish hair with the slightest natural curl wisping around the sides. Large, bloodshot eyes, bulging from inset sockets. Prominent cheek bones sitting a top a half-crooked grin full of even more crooked teeth. He is adorned with bountiful pimples and that teenage perma-grease gloss. He’s the kid who works at the Jimmy John’s around the corner from my house. I want to punch him in the throat. “Can I take your order?†he asks so congenially. His thick white eyebrows slant downward ever so, as if drawn on by a cartoonist who never wants his creation to appear as anything but angry. His pleasantry is a ruse. I shake my head at him, letting him know that I see right through his smug little smile. I know who he is. He’s the devil. Then, as if being controlled by a puppeteer, I impulsively reach out, grab him by the collar, and yank his entire body across the countertop. He screams in fright, and I silence him by pushing him into the ground and pressing his bony right cheek hard into the cold tile below Continue reading: My Jimmy John’s Bully
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