Naughty Nicole: Addressing #marchforourlives and Gun Control

On Today’s episode of The World In My Eyes we have no choice, my heathens, but to address the #marchforourlives brew-ha-ha that happened over the weekend. Oh my dear lord… where to start. First off, I’m sorry if I offend any of your holier-than-thou-special –snowflake-f***ing-unicorn people, but this is not going to be pretty, so hold on to your hats, because we’re diving right into the insanity. One of the most important things to understand about these kinds of protests is that they’re a lot of fun. You design a creative sign, carpool or catch a bus down to D.C. with your friends, stand around for a few hours chanting and cheering, watch a few of your heroes speak or perform, then spend the evening checking out the sights before you head home. And perhaps most importantly, you get to feel good about yourself and have your own beliefs validated. You get to feel righteous and powerful and optimistic about the future, and that’s a high that no other activity can match. Saturday’s #MarchForOurLives, was organized by student activists who have become national figures after surviving the massacre that killed 17 of their classmates and teachers at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida last month. Still, protesting as a feel-good outing appears to have hit new heights of popularity. It seems there’s a new one every other f***ing day: the Inauguration, the Women’s March (Parts I and II), Pussy hat patrol, Black lives matter, oops he touched me there, the March for Science bitches, and now the March for Our Lives. One man carried a clearly re-purposed sign that had originally read “VOTE OUT DEPLORABLE REPUBLICANS 2018” before he’d crudely pasted “NRA” above “REPUBLICANS,” the letters overlapping like a middle school poster presentation. This was just one example of the general amalgam of special Unicorn liberal causes on display: pussy hats, Planned Parenthood totes, pro-LGBT stickers, anti-Trump signs, and DREAM Act buttons were all represented. In fact, the only thing missing was the #metoo and #timesup bulls**t.