Navigating Anxiety: Safe AND Uncomfortable at Once

Feeling hijacked by anxiety and overthinking every decision — like you're constantly "neck up" in your head, unable to just be? Joanna Hardis is a therapist and author who went from white-knuckling through life to learning how to be "neck down" — staying in her body instead of spiraling in her thoughts. She navigated the messy middle of major life changes through divorce, single parenting three kids, and being ghosted right before her birthday (yes, really) by practicing the paradox at the heart of her book Just Do Nothing: you can be safe and uncomfortable at the same time. This is a conversation about life transitions when your default is to armor up or white-knuckle through. For anyone overthinking their way through parenting, anxiety, or major life changes — wondering if taking care of yourself makes you selfish. Joanna shares emotional regulation tools for when anxiety hijacks you, practical distress tolerance practices (starting with your phone), and honest language for parenting without being controlled by fear or guilt. You'll hear why most of us armor up through people-pleasing, perfectionism, or overthinking — and how microdosing discomfort helps you respond to situations instead of reacting from emotions. In this episode: - Overthinking vs. neck-down awareness (and why therapy helped Joanna get out of her head) - How to tell if you're parenting from anxiety or responding to the actual situation - Distress tolerance 101: what it is and why it matters for emotional regulation - The phone as a five-pound weight: microdosing discomfort in real life - Boundaries for parents (and why asking for two minutes isn't selfish) - How to hold the paradox: safe and uncomfortable, grief and gratitude, love and anger - Why acknowledging feelings is essential — but fixating on them keeps you stuck - Self-compassion when you screw it up (because we all do) Get Connected & Support the Show: - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Follow Joanna Hardis on Instagram, visit her website, & buy her book Just Do Nothing or Just Do Nothing For Parents - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation