Networking Tips From the Trenches: What to Say, How to Exit, and Why Nobody Remembers with Return Guest Nicolle Ketcham

Do networking events terrify you? And what do you actually say at a networking event when you don't know anyone? In this episode, host Dani Raschel Chou and Nicolle Ketcham walk through one start to finish what to bring, where your name tag goes, which question to open with instead of “What do you do?”, and how to leave a conversation without apologizing for it.Nicolle "Nicki" Ketcham, co-founder of Big Future Consulting, helps professional service firms look more polished and communicate their brand online. She is also Dani's best friend, a returning guest, and, by Dani's description, a top-tier connector. This episode came directly from listener response to Ely Delaney's conversation about networking as an introvert, so Dani and Nicki set the usual format aside and built a practical networking 101 out of their own wins and misfires.They start before you leave the house: what belongs on a business card, why you should print on stock you can write on, and why Nicki never goes anywhere without a pen. They cover the LinkedIn QR code workaround for the day your cards are still in the car, what to do when there's no cell service, and why scanning the guest list and finding the host in the first five minutes changes the whole evening.In the room, the advice gets specific. Your name tag goes on your right shoulder so the other person's eyes travel up your arm as you shake hands. Your drink goes in your left hand so your right one is dry. Approach the person standing alone — they will be relieved. And stop opening with “So, what do you do?” Nicki's alternatives include “What are you working on that you're excited about?” and her favorite, “Who would be a helpful person for you to meet?” Dani's, when the banter is already good, is “How did you fail this week?”The middle of the conversation is about listening: asking the follow-up question instead of pivoting to your own story, mirroring as a practiced technique, and Nicki's husband, who never tells anyone a thing about himself and still leaves every party as the most interesting man there. Dani shares a recent event where an introduction went badly enough that she went home, and what she would do differently. Nicki answers with Kacey Musgraves: "You are not everybody's cup of tea."They close on the exit and the follow-up. Three exit lines that don't require an apology, the 24–48 hour follow-up window, why an obviously AI-generated email undoes the entire evening, and Dani's “human first, AI forward” take on using it well anyway. Nicki's metric for a good event is deliberately small: three real conversations, one helpful introduction, or one person you genuinely want to follow up with.Items/topics specifically mentioned throughout the conversation: Ely Delaney's episode on networking as an introvert; the Rubin Brothers episode; The Go-Giver by Bob Burg and John David Mann; Dallas Meetup; Chicks with Stix, a women's golf networking event at PGA Frisco; Big Bend; the AEC (architecture, engineering and construction? community in Dallas–Fort Worth; and the North Texas casting call for Frisco King that came out of one compliment at one event.Chapters0:00   Cold open: you're already networking0:15   Why we're doing a networking episode1:52   There's no wrong way to start2:26   Run clubs, Gen Z, and the pull toward community3:34   Introducing yourself when you're brand new4:11   Nobody remembers but you4:40   Pre-work: what belongs on your business card5:49   Carry a pen — and write on the card7:01   Forgot your cards? The LinkedIn QR trick7:55   No signal? The workaround8:33   Scan the guest list, arrive early, find the host10:02   Name tag on your right — and why11:51   Drink in your left hand12:21   Who to approach first13:34   Working the drink station14:05   Stop opening with “what do you do?”15:03   Better questions — including the best one15:40   “How did you fail this week?”16:37   Ask the follow-up, don't make it about you17:53   The best networkers are connectors18:43   Mirroring — and the party trick21:23   How to introduce two people21:54   When someone doesn't want to meet you23:48   Grace, and not being everybody's cup of tea26:17   The trip question that opened a door27:44   The elevator pitch: who do you help?28:20   Names: using them, and forgetting them30:32   Eye contact and what people notice31:23   Three exit lines that don't feel rude32:30   Follow up in 24–48 hours33:40   Why AI-generated follow-ups fail34:44   Three conversations, not thirty35:12   A compliment, Dallas Meetup, and a casting call37:57   When networking gives you “the ick”38:30   Be a go-giver39:15   Showing up bad at golf41:28   Phone a friend, and shoot your shot42:49   Thank you and close43:35   The takeaways, all in one place That's the With Hat and Cattle promise: Bringing you stories from people who walk the walk and leave you better off for listening.Connect with Dani Raschel Chou on Instagram @withhatandcattle or via email at [email protected]. Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more conversations that leave you better off for listening: With Hat and Cattle I Hosted by Dani Raschel Chou - YouTube! Go to www.withhatandcattle.com to sign up for our mailing list so you don't miss weekly insights. 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