Not This Not That

I feel like at this moment in a relatively long life so far, I should be able to say yes to certain things, no to others, and be able to count on things remaining relatively stable. Do you have that feeling?And yet I can’t because they’re not: nothing is either this certain thing or that. Nothing is truly solid, reliable, permanent. And the more energy I put into thinking it should be, the more struggle I’m in. When I can remember that my work, my home, my family, my life, are not definable or corral-able or really anything I can count on, it’s incredibly scary, yes. But it’s also a little bit funny, a little bit odd, and in the end, such a relief.