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Nowhere at Nowhere.com. You're about to enter around. And then we're supposed to go over this. Welcome to Nowhere, California, the issue.
Absolutely. Welcome to another segment of re-issuing Nowhere, California. Hopefully you guys can enjoy these because I don't know. People are kind of mixed with me.
And I know, and personally, I say we're doing this because we've run out of ideas. Well, we really haven't ran out of ideas. It's just we don't want them to forget about us. Well, you didn't let me finish.
Sorry. That's okay. That's all right. That's all right.
So this episode is, you can always not take them nowhere. Or we attack a puppy. This is Josh. And this is Val.
And welcome back to Nowhere, California, where we're facing here and we're talking about the little days. Yes. Hi, so we're really double. You know, I don't feel it and I don't look at it when I see them here.
And I'm just looking at the bright side, at least I'm not having trouble peeing. Oh, yeah. Back in the day and I told, we were movie junkies back then, too. And there was one movie that we heard about, a sequel coming out that we always were thought happy, awesome, that'd be pretty cool.
Yes. Well, he smells too. I mean, you know, how could you go wrong? We're not likely to be seeing that movie anytime soon.
Yeah, that's a lot of movieas long day. Yeah. You know, when we first heard about it, this is before the days of IMDb, so there was no way to background or check it or anything or even follow it. So, you know, if it was on the news at once, it was pretty much lost.
But now in this, this day, anything you hear about this is pretty much a great able thought. Yeah, pretty much. I mean, you know, things get blown out of proportion. And imagine my disappointment.
And maybe not too disappointed anymore, but, you know, it's all going to happen. Yeah, by the way. But that guy's rolling on the ideas of sequels and like something good ones we've seen, some of the bad ones we've seen. Yeah, one of the good ones and one of the bad ones.
It was hard to make this choice because there is this, that usual list to choose from, such as the Star Wars and Back to the Futures, and at least the Academy signs. Which one do you have, Manny? Yeah, yes. Oscar worthy to the end.
Yeah, my submission, Moscow. Right, right, right. I knew I would want to go off the beaten path here and make my choice count. Okay.
So I'm going to whip out Wes Craven's new nightmare. Yeah. One close to both of our hearts here. Yeah.
This one is an underrated classic. And I haven't been on Wes Craven wanting it that way. After the nightmare series went the way it did with the Kingdom Learning and all that stuff, it was time to put the fear of bringing back the world. And the only way to do that is bring the man into the real world.
If you're wondering why I'm hyping this up so much, do yourself a favor and watch it. Yeah, I mean, I can't really express the words. I remember seeing the second trailer. The first trailer was pretty good though.
We talked about that in the previous episode. How really nobody knew I had anything to do with Nightmare until Freddy popped up. Yeah. And then I saw the second trailer which went a little more into detail.
And I'm like, really? So we're bringing back Heather Langenkamp, which is a hero from the first one. That's all the years later. Oh God, it was great.
And the thing is, I was so pissed off when they killed her off in number three. It was a blast to see her again. Oh, yeah. I guess it would be on par with H2O.
I mean, Jamie Lickert is facing my tires again. Yeah, and we know how much we love that. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
H2O. I mean, hey, it was a revenge thing. This was, I guess, in the sense. I didn't think anything could dwarf Freddy's death.
I thought that was going to be as climactic as it could be. But then Wes pulls the wool over his eyes and just says, hey, look at this. And fuck with the wool over his face. Exactly.
And the thing is, yeah, you say, well, how do you make him scarier? Well, let's bring him into our world. Yeah. Right.
And stuff like that. Yeah, our actual reality. And they need him instead, a demon that is captured by storytellers. Yeah.
That's a pretty good plot. The way Wes Craven puts it, they're like, well, what does he do now? Well, he's so used to being afraid now that's pretty much the form he'll take. Yeah.
Wow. He just starts to hold people. What was that? Oh, yeah.
I mean, the thing is, you know, Wes Craven took stuff in spite of it. It was like there were earthquakes that were happening in 1995. There were the, you know, he was having nightmares. He was working at Wes Craven's, or comes from his nightmares.
Yeah. Yeah. So a lot of his work is there. And Heather Langenkamp, during that time, she was being stalked.
Yeah. So there was a lot of reality based. I mean, if you're going to put in another reality, that's what Wes Craven did. He succeeded in putting it into a reality and actually asked Heather Langenkamp, would it be okay if I incorporated some of your life into this?
And I say good, good sport for doing that. Well, she trusts us Wes. Wes basically gave her the best movie scene of her career. She got to make movies.
I'm not going to do her other work, but none of you could really touch that original nightmare. No, nothing can. And he tried to go back to the best he could. You know what?
It was a satisfying hit. I mean, even though it was supposed to be like a new beginning, it was an even more satisfying end than Freddie's dead. Oh, and funny little trivia there. Johnny Depp actually walked up to him and asked him why he wasn't asked to play himself in the movie.
And he went, yeah. And Wes said, well, you were busy. This was, you know, I mean, Johnny Depp was borderline A-list at the same time. It was pretty pirate-spent.
He was already doing a lot of really good work. And he said, what have you done? Because it was Johnny Depp's first film. Exactly.
So he has a loyalty to who brings him into the spotlight. Yeah, and I think it was mighty big. He would have done it. But yeah, Wes Craven's new nightmare is exactly what it was.
It was a new nightmare. And the movie was just all out satisfying. Am I missing anything else? No, basically, like I said, after you had to do yourself a favor, if you haven't seen it, do people that have seen it, do yourself a favor.
Watch it again. Yeah, you know, if you haven't seen it, please give it a look. It's really stupendous. You know, I think it's kind of funny if you compare the two franchises, the two big horror franchises, Freddie and Jason.
Freddie has got new nightmare, which is kind of the oddball, you know, out of the group. And Friday the 13th, Jason has Jason X, where he's in the future. Yeah, so each one has got an oddball. And then the very next film where they're ever seen is when they're fighting each other.
At least before their respective remakes. But respected, not respected. Yeah, exactly. I guess the next best of sequel is in your hands.
Yeah, that's my thing. I think we have a difference of opinion here because I heard you saying that it sucked or something like that. But yeah, it's okay. I don't really say it sucked.
Your choice is odd one. All right. I'd like to hold it on. Maybe it's that odd choice for you.
Oh, right. It's just an odd one. Oh, well, that is what we're going to be discussing as I picked as one of the greatest sequels I have ever seen is Tron Legacy. That is the movie I picked.
And I feel it is an example of how a sequel could actually work 25 years after its predecessor. Because I love the original Tron. The light cycles, the whole Shabengi, even in its unrendered glory. It's a classic.
It's beautiful. And now we've got this new 3D jumps right at you and stuff like that. I mean, they're like, got dominatrixies. That's pretty hot.
I'm not there to claim that one. Yeah, exactly. But yeah, I really think it's a good way. Also, it brings back some of the original players.
Definitely Jeff Bridges as Kevin Flynn. And he's dealing with his son. And if you're going to pass the torch, that's the way to do it. I thought it was the next step.
I know a lot of people hating on this one, Indiana Jones, King of the Crystal Soul, which I also liked. Tron Legacy is just the perfect passing of the torch movie. It just hits all the marks. When you go into the old theater, I mean, it's the same set from the first movie or not.
It's rebuilt to look old and dusty. It just hits all the marks on nostalgia. I really don't have enough positive things to say it out. I have so much.
I really want to hear your views on this, Josh. I told you in the past, I watched the movie and it was a lot of me. I'm the one that sat and watched the first original Star Wars. Probably if I was born in this time and watched them when they were huge, I probably would love them.
Probably. Now it's like, okay, Tron Legacy was a great movie. Like you said, I will pull off a great sequel during something years later. Okay.
And Jeff Bridges, the dude can't be wrong. No, I love that guy. He's the dude. Yes, the dude can't be wrong.
No. So honestly, I do that at that. Yeah. The dude can't be wrong.
No, last episode, we were all some of the blows on the dark guy. Yes. I mean, we won the thing. It's like I said, I will never come to blows with you.
Just like, well, I really love about this. It's like we do have a different sort of opinion. And I love that. I don't like button heads with you, but it sounds like you have a different sort of opinion.
It's like why I want to do this. But now if I ever make you watch something like head, then you're probably going to stab me. Yeah. The less we speak about better, like I said, I will try.
I say the word try anymore constructive, but I can't guarantee it. And if it has the monkeys and I swear, I'll kill you. But you know, I don't want you to be constructive at all. I want all your rage.
Yeah. So I have to look forward to each movie you give me. But yeah, I really wanted to hear your view. It's kind of like, now what exactly made it odd to you?
I don't want to say anything. Did anyone spell or, yeah, get me quicker by doing anything again? Well, at the very end, Kevin Flynn absorbs clue, which is a bad version of himself, in himself, in kind of, you know, implodes and I guess passes away. But, and then he brings the ISO, the other check.
She was an algorithmic whiteboard that was born in the grid. You know, nobody created her. She was just like that started and he brought her into the real world. I think that was a big number.
I was like, is that the program button in the real world? Yeah. I was walking, it was odd. I mean, I needed more sleep or something.
And then kind of the impact on that. He's in there for four years, but still dies. That's what I think screwed up. But the thing is, he's got the necklace around him.
I think that maybe his father. Yeah. You never know. It could be a long more man.
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. I mean, digital data and they even left it open. I mean, I know there's a prequel series coming out on JETX or something like that.
Not embarrassing. Yeah, I think it'll be interesting. It's actually got the guy playing, I mean, it's like, hey, we'll actually have Tron and Tron. But also, it's not open.
You notice that at the very end, it's smaller. And the end of Tron too, you notice that when the character dies, they do reds, right? Well, Tron did not do reds. That's true.
Yeah. Even after that big explosion, the world is still there. Tron could still very much be alive. Oh, yeah.
And I gotta tell you, I really had a geek gasm. When Tron is an evil program for most of this movie. We're not really sure that it's him or not. And so, he gets his consciousness back and before he's, oh, by the way, he's on a light jet.
I think it's freaking sweet. He's on a light jet. He says, I have a total geek gasm. We said, I fight for the user.
Oh my God, it took me back. It was the most moments that just was really good to me. I can understand where you feel it's weird. But the whole plot outline, if you're following, what clue needed was the golden ticket, you know, his disk, in order to come into the world and basically commit genocide.
So, it was already programs were going to invade the world. So, an ISO coming into the real world didn't really bother me that much. Oh, I really don't. Hey, hey, that's okay.
If you said you may have wanted more sleep, but I sure as hell won't make you watch it again. Hey, what about our head? Oh, dude. So, I guess the next, next of the sequel discussion we did the best.
So, I guess, logically, it'd be the worst. The worst. Alright, so, what's on your list, my man? Well, if you're gonna have a listener to the lower California world, you know, when it comes to people or movie subjects, we will always hit both sides.
And like we said right now, we're gonna hit the worst. Yeah. On top of the sequels, we knew we would have to step into the minefield of crap, hopefully coming out the other side with all our lens intact. Honestly, there's way too many of these stupid sequels to name, such as The Next Cry Kid, which gave us Hillary Swinks.
I blew. And it's off the floor Mr. Miyagi's Bank Bink. Yeah.
Ding-lolf too, which my little jakebox decided to fuck you. Speed-doo. With no can of reuse. Can I use hand of both, though?
Yeah, yeah, she's okay. And Jason takes Manhattan. Alright, Jason takes Manhattan. Well, this one shows how oblivious New Yorkers truly are.
That was hilarious. Yeah. But now I had to make sure I made the right bad choice in this one. And there's so many.
There's so many. And there's the directed DVD world of prequels, which I'm gonna dip into right now. My choice is Marley Me, the puppy years. Oh God!
Like I said, this one is a directed DVD prequel. Fill in all those important lights between when they first got them and all the original movie. Oh, Jesus. I can only hope someone doesn't make them a mistake of thinking this is the first part.
Actually, it might be better that they come into this one thing and it's the first part because, another way would be, let's watch this cute puppy. No, wait, since we all know what's going to happen in the next movie. Yeah, I mean, no! You point asleep.
You know, it's almost like they put out the prequel. I mean, it's based off the book, right? No. It's not based on any of the books.
Is that even based on any of the books? I read in the back of it correctly. Yes, I did not watch the movie, because I did not wanna watch it. I wanna make the watch pay again before I watch that movie.
He's such a dick. Go ahead. The dog talks. Okay, wait a minute.
Josh, are you fucking with me here. Marley talks in this one. You mean like everybody's? Yeah.
Okay, Marley Me just made my shit list. What's going on here? here. The dark talking talks.
Yep. There's also character in those news. All right. Well, there's a lot of voices here.
I think we get some of the animals for the talk. This is an insult to people. This is the insult to the doctor. The first one I got put this lead by another character.
But come on. Yeah, this is messed up people. Okay, you know, the first movie, I'm not even gonna go as far as to say that it was good. It was good.
I'll be mad at it since they made you're up. No, it did. It did. It's almost like it's like, okay, we really made people cry.
Let's try to undo all those tears by putting out these cute little people. Yeah, this is an insult. You're not gonna undo the damage and emotional scars. And the fact that I was originally me is based on a true story.
The guy that makes the story should be insulted. Yeah, it's like it's like you said, Josh, maybe after watching the prequel, they'll be glad that the dog is dead. Yeah, shut the fuck up. All right, that's on our mind.
Right? Yes. Okay, we're gonna go to mine. Okay.
Well, you know, it's really funny, Josh, as I picked, I clunked these together. But one of mine is a great role. And one of mine is a sequel. I believe we managed to do that.
I mean, we're talking sequels, but yeah, I went prequel route just like, you all remember this. This is our show. We can do what the fuck we've got. Exactly.
Well, what is a sequel? Now, I know this is confusing. My sequels rant. I clunked the Scorpion King to and Scorpion King three together.
These cinematic twins should have been avoided. Now, look, what does first examine Scorpion King to? All right. This film is a prequel to a prequel of a sequel of a remake.
Okay, okay, I'm gonna so this up for you. That is it is the prequel to the Scorpion King, right? Yeah, which is a prequel to the money return, which is a sequel to the money, which is a remake of the original money with Carla. I put a little yeah, so that now let's take a look at Scorpion three.
Yeah, we look three years talking fucking God. So, Scorpion King three takes place after the first Scorpion King, the original prequel of the money. So that would make this movie a sequel to a prequel of a sequel to a remake. My mind's blown.
I peed a little and I poo some more. Yeah, and I just adult tumor. But if trying to figure out the chronology of these movies wasn't enough, but piss you off, Josh, the movies themselves fall into the same trap that most of these director video movies suffer from. And you know what that is talking animals?
Oh, fuck you. Oh my God. Well, among other things, they are this. They are extremely cheap and production, cheap and production value, and they look really nothing like the original product.
Well, you want to go with the obvious answer? No, no, it's not exactly obvious. But that's what happens. And they put out de-list actors in the leading roles.
And the movies are just, well, they're boring. Okay, even the action scenes are boring. And I'm clumping at both of them together, both Scorpion King two and Scorpion three are guilty of this and they are so freaking guilty. Have you seen the prequels?
No. You know what? I think I know what I'm going to make use it through. Anyway, the action scenes are boring.
My biggest gripe is with Scorpion King three. Okay, they had Ron Perlman and Billy Zane in the movie. Now, they're not exactly English actors, but they're pretty big, you know? And they're not utilized to their full potential in this film.
Pearlman and Zane are brothers who are rivals in this film. And they're fighting over, you know, they're at war over territory or some bullshit like that. See, I can't even get the plot straight because I'm so agitated. Well, Pearlman and Zane, who are mothers who are rivals?
They don't share screen time in this movie. It's almost like they couldn't afford to have them on the set together. Yeah, okay. While they're both too pissed off about the script and be enforcing the movie.
Yeah, yeah. Ron just says, I'm not doing this. Unless you put Billy Zane on it. I don't know why he sounds like Marlon Grappell, but you know, it works for me.
Okay, now don't you think it would be interesting to see that your brothers have, you know, some kind of an exchange? You know, maybe show a little humanity between the characters. It's like, oh, this is my brother. I'm killing him.
Do I really want to kill him? You know, see both sides. But no, we get good. Same bad.
You kill him. No. I mean, yeah, don't get me started on the mother of all anti-climaxes. Zane's character is the bad guy in this movie.
Now, he is seen ripping the ear off someone early in the film. You know, I mean, that's badass. You have somebody's ear off with his bare hands. I mean, we're really, we're clearly painting him out to be literally the force to be reckoned with.
A badass. Yeah. But instead, at the very end of the movie, they turn into a total pussy. There's not even a final fight between him and the Scorpion King.
He, we get to the park where the Scorpion King and Billy Zane's character face off and there's no final fight. The bad guy surrenders and the villagers Ian. So if you want to watch a good cat movie, watch Catabool and musical. Oh gosh.
Yeah. Exactly. But this is the thing that's what we get. Now, I never thought that a movie that has a scene with six ninjas waiting in the elephant could be so underwhelming.
But this just blew the ever-loving pooch. I mean, the industry is milking a franchise for all its worth. But you know what, Josh? That's hard for you.
They put out less money to see if they can turn a profit off an extremely profitable franchise. You know, it may have been possible that they only put a little more effort into it. I mean, look, I've got numbers to support this. Okay.
Talk from the numbers. Okay. Let's take a look at these. Okay.
The money. And I'm talking about the 1999 remake. Okay. The money showed out $80 million and grossed $221 million.
All right. That's the term. Yeah. The money returns put out 98 million.
Put out reward and it goes $430 million. Made its money back. It was a good gamble, right? Okay.
Money. Two of the dragon emperor put out what? And put out even more put out $145 million and it grossed $401 million. Now it did not make as big a profit as the second one, but it still turned a profit.
It made its money back, right? Okay. That last one didn't make as much profit, but still managed to make its money back. That worked out pretty well.
Now let's look at these directed video scorpion kings. How's the share? Well, why don't I have to write the video? The original pick up the scorpion king with the rock.
Yes, with Dwayne the Rock Johnson put out $60 million. Now, isn't that sad? If it even put out as much as the first money, but anyway, anyway, they were able to know what they were. So they put out $60 million and it grossed $164 million.
So turn it did. It made over $100 million. So, all right. They did a gamble and it worked.
But instead of making more sequels that hit theaters, they decided to go the cheap route. Well, they also lost the rock too. So, well, you know, after seeing the movie, I'm sure he just said, this is fucking bullshit. I have to do this.
All these actors worked for scale. I'm not cooking this. Oh, yeah. It's so bad that even the rock won't cook it.
Here we go. Bad pun decide. All right. Now, this is a funny one.
The scorpion king two's budget is a mystery, but it grossed $10 million in DVD sales. How can you put a price on a soul? You know what? I don't think I did.
Oh, and this is a bigger turnaround. The scorpion king three. I know how much it put out. It put out $5 million.
But it's gross. It's a complete mystery. It's like, it's like, all you want is embarrassed. It's like, we don't want you to realize how badly that we fucked up.
You know what? Hollywood just has a serious gambling problem. And it's like they blew their wide on scorpion king. I just, I don't like, I'm not terribly fond of the prequel or the sequel to the remake.
The more you know, yeah, bomb bomb bomb bomb. So your thoughts on this travesty, Josh? The money release, I honestly meant I never really got it until the first one was full. I watched this one mainly because the rock had his little chunk in it, but it was like, okay, whatever.
Right. The third one that was a dragon king. Two of the dragon. Yes.
That was a good one. I'm kind of interested if they do decide to do a fourth one because the last thing I heard of to do a fourth one, it'll be in South America with the Aztec pyramids, the Aztec emperor mummy thing going. So I'm kind of Jones and see how they pulled that off. Oh, not a 3D.
Hey, I think it's just kind of weird. It's like, what is the rock doing following Brynn and Fraser? I mean, in a technical sense, he followed Brynn and Fraser from the mummy to do the scorpion king. And now Brynn and Fraser did journey to the center of the earth and now the rock is doing journey too.
Might as well. Yeah, do the peck pop of love. Oh my god. And where the fuck is the guys original father?
Or did his dad just turn into the rock? No, his rock is a stepdad. Oh, his stepdad. He's got a real good relationship with his stepdad.
Do you know anything about that kind of movie? It might be over here. So let's go find your grandfather. Unfortunately, those move.
I didn't see the original journey to the center of the earth. Which is not the original by the way. The one with the figure. Yeah.
I can't do it. That's pretty cool. Oh sure. What is it?
I'm sure it was. And journey too looks to be a pretty interesting movie, but it kind of has that spy kids vibe. Yeah, you know, that's a whole 3D aspect. Oh, you mean people like seeing unreadred chip jump at them?
Oh, no, this is really this is built exclusively for 3D. Oh, I see. Yeah. So yeah, so it's not like, it's not like, ooh, let's make him do that thing and we'll throw something at people.
Yeah. Well, I'm hoping I didn't go too off par. I just thought that was a real weird connection. Oh yeah.
But these people from this franchise are involved in another franchise. And what, anyway, what is it? I mean, was Brynn and Fraser offered for all the well, we don't know. Well, maybe they were like, maybe they were like, this one.
Yeah, I guess so. Because I mean, Brynn and Fraser was a bit part in G.I. Joe. Yeah.
And yet he was too good to do this equal to dream. I don't know. I don't know. G.I.
Joe thing is on another episode. That's all on the episode. And like I said, I didn't mean to get too far off topic, but it's just it's mind-boggling the stuff that Hollywood's putting out there. Yeah, Hollywood.
You wonder why sometimes the box offices go straight? Yeah. Well, you know what? In number will be up next episode.
Yeah. So with that being said, it is time for the silly ass game. It's the same ass I've been having again. Yes.
So, and this is my turn to choose the letters and we'll go with the simple A, B, C. All right. Show us that off. Yeah, sir.
Animals beast and camels. Oh my. Animal belt. Chewy.
And better the game. And they've crouched. Agnes banged with colon. If it could, I'm normally big cock.
Animal butt cut. A brown crayon. That's my three-year-old boy. That's my ass ball connector.
Also known as the paint. And bull crap. And Andrew AIDS being cyborgs. Alice Banks Casey.
April Banks Casey. Ninja Turtles. Aynold Buck cork. And you're going in the golly.
You know what I have nothing for that. You know what to do. And I want to do it. I'm going to anal butt his cork.
That's a fuck. I don't know. I don't know if they'll give you the last episode. It's just not anal reviews.
I don't know. I'm a good one for us. I'm going to take a good one too. Well, she likes the one.
We'll see you guys on episode 12. Take a look at this.