Obamagate: Fanfiction for the Fox-Brained and more Gaslighting!

This week, we dive headfirst into the flaming dumpster that is American politics—with oven mitts, of course. Andrew Bailey is busy protecting corporations from the trauma of accountability, while actual Afghan allies get shown the door for having the audacity to believe U.S. promises mean anything. We take a scenic detour through Obamagate—aka "Fan Fiction for the Fox News Crowd"—and pause to reflect on the beautiful separation of church and state (RIP). Tina gets real with her congressman, and by "gets real," we mean “politely wrecks him with facts.” Ghislaine Maxwell makes a cameo in our ongoing segment, “Elite Crimes: Just Vibes, No Consequences.” And finally, Hunter Biden’s interview reminds us that, yes, everyone’s life is a mess—some of us just don’t have 24/7 surveillance and a last name that triggers boomers. Democracy may be on life support, but at least the commentary is killer.