Oneika Mays on Mindfulness, Loving-Kindness, and Writing ‘Sit With Me’

Host Dr Russell Thackeray interviews Jersey City-based meditation teacher, yoga teacher, and licensed massage therapist Oneika Mays, discussing her love of reading and music, the value of stories, and how technology, social media, and AI affect attention and thinking. Mays describes being introduced to meditation over 15 years ago and teaching for about 10, explaining that an injury and over-reliance on yoga classes led her to deeper meditation and mindfulness, which helped her feel okay even when she didn’t feel okay. She emphasises practicing with compassion, distinguishing Buddhist “kindness” as ease and spaciousness from “tenderness” as self-love, and notes how her experiences as a Black queer woman inform her teaching around feeling “othered.” She recommends Jon Kabat-Zinn and Sharon Salzberg, and explains her book, “Sit With Me: A Non-BS Journey to Mindfulness and Meditation,” combining memoir, metta practice, and her work launching a wellness program at Rikers Island’s women’s jail.00:00 Welcome and Introductions00:19 Life in Jersey City01:23 Oneika Beyond Work02:37 Love of Reading04:55 Teachers and Names06:47 Books Versus Screens08:33 Meditation Origin Story10:18 Kindness and Tenderness13:02 Othering and Belonging15:56 Nuance in a Divided World19:57 AI and Attention Spans21:13 Books for Meditation22:15 Why She Wrote Sit With Me24:41 Rikers and the Program26:15 Metta Loving Kindness28:05 Final TakeawayYou can contact us at [email protected] can be found online or link to our website https://resilienceunravelled.com