Parents - Let them Go!
from Sports Thoughts Hosted by Wayne Goldsmith
By Wayne Goldsmith “What can I do, Wayne?” — Signed, Desperate Parent I get this message all the time: “My daughter was a great gymnast at 8. Winning regionals at 10. Competing nationally at 11. Now she’s 15 and wants to quit. What can I do?” What they want me to say: “I can tell you how to motivate her to stay and make the Olympic team.” What I actually say: “Let her go. Tell her you love her. Support her decision. Tell her you’ve loved watching her train and compete — and whether it’s a break or permanent, you’re here for her unconditionally.” What most parents say instead: “Do you know how much money we’ve spent? How much time I’ve wasted driving you around?” Parents — listen to me. Please. The guilt trip does not work. All you’ll do is ensure they never come back — and destroy your relationship with them. Let them go. Leave the door open. Love them. Support them. Listen to them. Say something like: “If that’s your decision, I respect it. I’m a little disappointed I won’t get to watch you play — because I love that — but if that’s what you want to do, I fully support you and I love you.” That’s it. That’s the answer. The kids who come back to sport — and many do — come back because the door was left open. The kids who never return? Most of them had parents who made quitting feel like a betrayal. Don’t be that parent. What would you say to your child if they wanted to quit? This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit waynegoldsmith.substack.com/subscribe
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