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EPISODE · Feb 22, 2026 · 1H 12M

Paul Eastwick: The New Science of Love and Connection

from Commonwealth Club of California Podcast · host Commonwealth Club of California

Join us at Commonwealth Club World Affairs on February 13 to prepare scientifically for Valentine’s Day. Paul Eastwick has taken a groundbreaking look at the science of attraction and compatibility, challenging our most fundamental assumptions about how human mating has evolved. Eastwick takes exception to evolutionary psychology’s claim, cloaked in incontrovertible Darwinian terms, that our minds have been shaped by primal drives that pit the genders against each other—from the myth that men are wired to be promiscuous to the notion that wealth, status and beauty are the ultimate aphrodisiacs.   Drawing on pathbreaking research—including original experiments from his own UC Davis lab—Eastwick reveals that these stories bear little resemblance to how pair-bonding really works. While beauty and charisma factor into first impressions, their influence fades fast. Lasting attraction is built through gradual, often mundane moments that forge strong attachment bonds. Eastwick’s liberating new paradigm for finding meaningful, exciting relationships includes: that personality, lifestyle, values and humor are poor predictors of compatibility; that a person’s tendency to “date around” has little bearing on their long-term relationship potential; and that the most secure relationships offer a “safe haven” and “secure base” for each partner. By excavating the hidden history of human mating, Eastwick paints a radical new picture of the roots of enduring chemistry. Distilling evolutionary biology, anthropology and psychology into accessible insights, Eastwick explains a more evolved approach to dating which makes it far more effective. Eastwick will be in conversation with Kathryn Paige Harden, who directs the Developmental Behavior Genetics Lab at the University of Texas at Austin, where she is a professor of psychology. Harden has published two books and more than 150 scientific papers on the nature and nurture of human behavior. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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