Poltergeist 3 (1988)

We're making an ad. An apping an ad. This is where I think if we're doing it right, Alec Baldwin comes in. He says a couple things.

He listens to the podcast every week. Has he been canceled? Was Alec Baldwin the one who killed somebody? I hear Gary Sinise is free.

Oh, okay, great. He hasn't worked since 2020. So what would be the script that we would have Gary Sinise for the Napping Through Happy Hour podcast? Listen to this damn show.

Damn it. The Napping Through Happy Hour podcast brought to you by Geeksy. Real life, real drama, real time. I'm Gary Sinise.

That's the ad. That's the ad. That's the ad. This week on Carol Ann, we caroled for 1988's Anne Fest, Carol Ann.

And Adam caroled his eyes out with the rest of the end. Scott's questioning how Anne up you have to be the Carol to kill yourself. And Matt hops in the tubs of Carol both of his hands. Point is, this Carol Ann left us in a state of post-watching Carol Annas.

And we're here to Anne up and discuss. Yes, he'll read that through with minimal errors. That's what he did. That guy's got a solid thing up, but then he only messes up with the baby guy.

Oh, yeah. Okay, so we're gonna talk about Porter Guys 3, which was picked by our friend Plymouth. Or I guess formerly our friend. We're not friends anymore.

So I know for a fact I'm the one that hated this movie the least. And I still didn't like it very much. So this is gonna be an interesting episode, everybody. But here we go.

Wait, wait, wait. Oh shit. Are we talking about Porter Guys 3, 1 second? Carol Ann!

So, okay, since we keep bringing up the Carol Ann part, I forget which critic it is. I think it might have been Roger Rebert wrote a review that when he went and saw this film in theaters, the audience became so frustrated that they started yelling the name of the character back at the screen whenever they would yell Carol Ann. Carol Ann, Carol Ann, me? No, no, no, no.

Carol Ann, you buddy. Carol Ann, Carol Ann, Carol Ann! Carol Ann! Carol Ann!

In a hotel room watching a window washer who then reveals himself to be a creepy man in a hat and suit. I hadn't watched Porter Guys 2 in a while, turns out that this is Reverend Kane who was the villain in the second movie. Hey, quick side note, I watched one, two, and three in succession and that was a fucking mistake. Oh.

One of those movies is really good. Not so much when you watch it in succession. How was two? I don't think I've ever seen Porter Guys 2.

Is it bad? It's not Poulcher Guys 3 bad, but it's pretty bad. It's pretty sweet though. Yeah, there's a pretty sweet scene with a giant worm that I always remember.

Oh, the worm puke part. That freak man is so bad, it's like 11 year old watching it now. It's just like really silly, but man, the practical effects on part two are killer. Yeah, it's a couple of other sides.

It's crap, but I mean, whatever. I honestly do think that part two might be a little bit better on the practical effects side of things because man, that scene in the first one where the dude peels his face off, when you watch that now, as a grown up, you're like, well, you can really fucking see the wizard behind the curtain on that special thing. Where he just suddenly becomes like a wax figure and shit. The most disturbing part, I think, of part two, and if we're talking about most of each movie, in part one obviously is the guy peeling his face off.

So when the kid who has braces, the braces like Kamalive and they wrap him up, Allah Asspiria, but they're not razor wire this time, that's still pretty freaky. And it's really good special effects that I mean still hold up with 25 years on. Right. Well, okay, so you watch these on succession.

So maybe you can answer this for me because I did. Do Carol Anne just become a worse actress as he's goofy went on? I think that they relied more heavily upon her each time and she was just a kid. All right.

So now she's staying with her and her aunt's new husband in a hotel that the husband is like the manager for or something like that. Yeah, yeah. Please, someone to explain to me what the fuck he does and what his job is. I have no idea.

I think he's the main trust holder or something like he's like the architect of I'm not like he wrote not like he made the actual building, but I think that he was like in charge of the whole project. And can I just say this is the stupidest logical leap for any horror movie that we've discussed. I think is this whole stupid bullshit where it's like, Oh, the parents don't want Carol Anne with them. So they're going to take her in this huge high rise in New York City just because they wanted to have a different building that they could haunt.

It's just so terrible. Well, this thing like I have like such an issue with the whole like like I get that one element of his like, Oh, they're trying to keep Carol Anne hidden away from Reverend Kane or something like that. But it never comes off that way. It comes off like the family's sick of this ghost bullshit and that completely goes against what the whole fucking plot line of the first two movies were about how they would go through anything to save their daughter.

That's fully reinforced when the aunt is like, I don't want to fucking deal with this anymore. Either. That's what it's really hates Carol Anne. No, please.

Please finish with the plot of this. Sorry. So, so Carol Anne goes to the special school where the principal Dr. Satan whose name sounds so close to Satan, it's not even funny.

We're watching House of a Thousand Coursesons. Doctor Satan. He's convinced that Carol Anne has the ability to create mass hypnosis. And was insane to me.

So bad. It's amazing because he has literally no evidence for his theories and yet manages to convince everybody of his bullshit all the time. And I don't get it. The absolute most egregious example of that is the coffee cup.

That is by far the stupidest fucking thing. So they're in a room. Carol Anne is, you know, trying to demonstrate for him like or he has a under hip nose or something like that. Long story short, people are watching through a one way mirror and a coffee cup sort of levitates up and smashes through the mirror.

And then when they look back, the coffee cup is still there. So he says to the woman behind the mirror, oh, see, she gave you a hypnotic suggestion for you to smash the glass. Well, if the coffee cup was coming from the other side of the mirror, all the glass would be smashed inward towards those people, not outwards. And also, no, shut up fucking, it's so fucking stupid.

Well, like, I think that at least Adam and I are like unnecessarily upset by House of Stupidness. So you know what I'm talking about? It's not talking about logic jumps. This movie jumps at shark every 45 seconds.

It goes from like stupid to stupid or do you want Tweedledy or Tweedled dumber? I don't know what the fuck man like. So do you know who the actor is that plays Dr. Seaton?

Dr. Seaton? No, who? Okay, his name is Richard Fire.

And I looked him up just out of curiosity. He's only ever acted in one other movie in his entire career. He's more famous because he's the writer of Henry Portion of a serial killer. So for some reason, they were just like, yep, that guy, we're going to put him in a, in Portion.

Sorry for what the fuck reason. That makes sense to me that he would write that movie because he must have like a pretty strong emotional connection to it because he acts like a fucking sociopath. He's just putting on a human crime. This entire fucking movie just pretending to have emotions.

All right. So Caroline keeps seeing this creepy dude, Reverend Kane, in pretty much various mirrors throughout the hotel, which this hotel has too many goddamn mirrors. Don't even question. But somehow Reverend Kane has found Carol Ann and he is, and then that delightful lady from all the other movies goes into route to savor.

I think her name is Tancin Tancin. Her name in the movie is pronounced Tancina, but we are most definitely not going to be pronouncing it that way. Fuck that. Hey, wait, wait, wait, wait.

So isn't she the one who's going to make us all cookies or? Yeah, yeah. That's the word on the street. And friendship necklaces apparently.

So eventually Caroline and her step cousin Donna and Donna's boyfriend Steve all get kidnapped by Reverend Kane. Donna really needs to get her head out of her pants. It's crazy. Like I'm a dude and I was never that horny.

Like that's stupid horny where I'm like, I know it's high school, but she's like, ugh, I just, I don't care. I just, I just want to tell you to touch. She's so horny. She's endangering the lives of everyone around her.

Yes. She sucks. She sucks so hard. So the ghost returns Steve, but then they're going to try to steal Carol Ann's aunt instead, but that's when Tancina arrives and tries to free both Carol Ann and Donna, but Tancina immediately and Donna rips herself out of Tancina's body.

Or Matt, please. Tancina. Tancina, sorry, but is, is that the real Donna? Well, it's not.

And she murders Dr. Satan. And then at the end, Carol Ann's aunt and husband manage to save Carol Ann by proving that they love her and also with the help of Tancina, whose ghost comes and walks Reverend Henry into light, which is what he needed Carol Ann for or whatever. I don't give a shit.

So, so like, so the only positives that I have in this movie and they are very minor fucking positives is that it is impressive to me that pretty much all these effects were done within the like in camera. Like that's a fucking thing to pull off and that's kind of cool that they even attempted it, but whatever. That's all anybody ever talks about as far as this movie is concerned. You go on the internet, you go on IMDB and run tomatoes and all that shit.

The only positive aspect that anybody can talk about is the way that they did those camera tricks. Well, guess what? It doesn't save this fucking movie. It does not make it any kind of redeemable or anything.

It's still absolutely fucking garbage. Matt's choking right now without shitting this fucking game. The only other thing is like the character of Reverend Kane is kind of creepy looking, but like it sucks all the fun out of the original film and they have so much explanation for shit beyond the simplicity of just this house is on indie baroground. That's all you fucking need in the first movie.

This one it's like all types of wacky is the ghost of a cult leader and Carol and had been chosen by blah blah blah and I don't care. No one cares. Let me help this movie. Carol and was born on an Indian burial ground.

There you go. Not the ghost thing that they own here. There you go. You have a million movies worth of fucking explanation.

That's all you need. There you go. I just helped you. Yeah, they just don't know what the fuck is going on in this movie.

They have no clue. What the damn film? Me neither. Me neither.

I haven't got any idea. I watched this movie yesterday. I don't know what the fuck happened. Can we talk about how you took a week break mid movie or did you start back from the beginning?

No, yes. Okay. So I watched Trick or Treat and attempted to watch Poltergeist 3 in succession. I got through Trick or Treat which while it was fucking stupid was still a lot of fun and I started into Poltergeist 3.

40 minutes into the movie I was so angry that I was just yelling at everything that every character was doing on the screen and I got so angry and frustrated that I shut it off. I did not watch it again until yesterday. So that was a full week's time that I gave between the first half and the second half of this movie which as far as I'm concerned is the only way to do it. Even though my point.

That must be what just screwed me over so bad is because I watched it all once sitting. Do you know what I did while I was watching Poltergeist 3? I ate a pizza. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I ate a pizza. I folded it laundry and put it away. I read a chapter of a book. That's how fucking boring this movie is.

Is that I chose to do chores and eat something instead of focus on this movie whenever I was like, all right, I'm going to go do this now. Well, to be honest, you're constantly eating things. You can't even record an episode of the podcast. You'd be eating something at the same time.

You've been pretty good lately. Do you remember that time that's got a piece of candy on the other side? I'm going to shoot him out for like 10 minutes. We got to find that episode so we can make that a retroactive episode one day because that is gold.

Okay, so you said that Reverend Kane is creepy. That I disagree with. I think he looks better in the second one than he does in this one. Like the window washer scene I thought was okay or she looks down and he kind of, there's this fucking creepy old band staring back up that definitely wasn't the original window washer.

Well, that's exactly it. Every time that they want to go somebody up or make them look creepy in this movie, they just make them look old. And I'm like, okay, yeah, the ravages of age, that's scary, I guess. Getting old, something to be scared.

I'm like, oh, fuck it. Or they get put in like a vegetable dehydrator and get all the moisture sucked out of it. Which is equally scary. So just, you know, keep that in mind.

Oh, that's going to be so bad. It's boring too. You're right. It's so fucking boring.

Why did you pick this Plymouth? Fuck man. I think she really is messing with us. It's got to be one of two reasons for three reasons.

One of three reasons. Reason number one, Scott's theory. She's just fucking with us. Reason number two, she thinks that the fact that the effects were done practically in camera is cool.

She had never seen this before, but everyone told her that it was really good because there are fucking people on the internet that'll tell you this movie's really fucking good. There are people that write fucking essays defending this movie. I don't get that. I don't think anybody that listens to this podcast, at least, I'm sure can and we'll have read some fucking book about it.

I cannot wait. I'm going to have really good time in two weeks when we discuss the epic pre-purity, right? Yeah, he didn't want to pick it, but we picked it for. I'm going to be like, what could you read for this?

He's going to say E.C. Comics and a couple of Stephen King books probably. I mean, that would make sense, right? I actually have read the rap, so I can help him.

I've read that too. I've read it within the last calendar year, so fuck you guys, vote. Okay. So I've said my piece about Porter Guys 3.

Scott, you got anything else to add or are we going to listen to notes? Oh no. All right, here's some notes. All right, good, because I got some great fucking notes.

All right, so notes for polter guys 3. First note, we're five minutes in. I am not excited for this movie. This is not going in any kind of direction that I'm looking forward to.

Her name's Tan Jaina. I'm Tan Jaina, at least she's letting it get some sun. I'm living in a red right now. Okay, these people live in a literal house of mirrors.

Like there's mirrors on every wall. Like there's mirrors in their bathrooms and bedrooms. Everything's mirrored in Caroline's room. You can't even see the door.

The door itself is just one big mirror. What the fucking... You don't think you would get nauseous after a while? If everywhere you went, there was millions of reflections of just like, oh, that wouldn't be uncomfortable.

And I mean, you're in a polter guys movie. Don't you know that the last place you want to be is around mirrors? You know what makes a good movie? Having tons of child actors in it.

That's always a recipe for a good fucking... That's always your favorite thing. I know that you beg me to only pick movies with a full cast of child actors. Yes, yes.

It's kind of disturbing. I have a mean ask you about that. I hope that when Father IV comes out, they allow me to kill small children again because I miss that feature. Anyways, you know what, Heather?

Movie had high-rise in it. Gremlins too. You know what movie I wish I was watching right now? Gremlins too.

I'm with you. Fuck, this is so bad. Oh, it's just making me yearn for better movies. So what if we took this plot, right?

And we replaced Reverend Henry with a whole bunch of Gremlins and remade this as Gremlins 3, the mirrors. Okay, okay. Tanshawne, it comes back too. Like we bring in Tanshawne back from the dead.

We throw the trigger in there, you know, with this movie improved vastly with the addition of Gremlins. I have one contractual obligation that you need to fulfill. They need to murder the shit out of Car allan in the first five minutes through the movie. It's like a swarm of Gremlins got her.

I'd be so happy. Okay, so flip side, what if instead of Kismo it's Car allen gets water poured on her and then they all just pop out of her back? And then the army of Car allan is so what that would be just like, Car allan forever. Also here's a little Debbie Downerness.

She died right after filming this. So I don't know if we should really be making jokes about Car allan. You know what that was what, 15, 25 years ago? I think it's cool.

Yeah, I thought it's not a top date. The top date is 22.5 years. So we can. I just feel bad.

It's a sad story. I think I read that there's a doc being made called the Porter Guys Curse just about like, which I don't think it's a good idea for a documentary, but also watch it because I do find it interesting that so many people who worked on these films did die insanely young under weird circumstances. But yeah, I think that we're living in an all right world where there's no more Porter Guys movies. Except for that remake that nobody saw and I almost forgot existed when I said that sentence.

I heard that that was pretty funny. So I think it was like a red letter media review or something where just who was it that Sam Rockwell, he was in that movie. Apparently the whole second act of the movie, he just acts pissed off an annoyed that there's ghosts around him. Like he's not scared or like worried.

He's just angry. He's like, for fuck's sake, get these ghosts out of here. I've got shit I gotta do. Fuck.

Okay, so what is Tom Scared's job in this movie? I know we just discussed this, but he has a really nice fancy office. He gets his built in like pant house living area and yet when when pipes freeze people come and tell him about that. Like is he the super management?

The only manager. Yeah, and when glass cracks that's something he needs to know about as well. I don't fucking know. So I mean this is scary movie.

This is scary movie I've ever seen. Like I'm terrifying. I've never been so scared of a movie. I could have been six years old and watched this and I would have been like, Mom, this is boring.

Let me just shut this off. Like there's no tension. There's no anything. It's honestly just people looking at you through mirrors every once in a while.

That's it. Like where, why is that scary? It's like how you like, put it out of that. He just, he can't even make jokes about how depressately bad this movie is.

I had to go to a wake this weekend and this movie was still the most depressing thing that I had to watch this week. It's because you saw Tana Dine and you're like, no, Tana Dine and no, Carolyn Saver. I still don't understand what happened. She got slammed into the mirror and immediately turned into a like 100 year old corpse.

Oh, oh, you just wait. You just wait. I'm sorry. I'm jumping ahead of the notes.

So Dr. Satan is like the most melodramatic overacting piece of garbage that I've ever seen in a movie. Like a Carol Ann is way, like way far and above a better actor than this guy is. Like he is just horrendous in this movie.

And it grinds any kind of, you know, suspension of disbelief that you have to an absolute halt when this guy gets on screen. He's like, she's committing acts of hypnotic suggestion. Like he's really putting it on and hamming it up and it's just awful. Here's a note I had.

Please somebody come slip my wrist. That's a note. So Carol Ann is crying in a scene and it does not look like normal tears. It looks like she has like olive oil running down her face, coming out of her tear ducts.

She's kind of like weird, super viscous substance and weird me out. At this point, I just drew a small picture of a poo with stink lines coming out of it. That's a note I made on my note pad. Can you please scan and add that to the Facebook page?

I will. This also goes up. I will absolutely take a picture of that for you. Thank you.

Tom Scariot is giving Donna a lot of on-the-mouth kiss in this movie. It happens on three separate occasions and it makes me really uncomfortable every time that it happens. It's gross. So they go down to that art show.

So that's the way it is in their family. It might actually, the second I take that back. One of the times that it happens, it's actually Ghost Donna. He definitely got, you know, pretty close to Ghost next there.

Pretty close. They go, they're at the art show and for some reason, at the entrance to the art show, there is three people dressed in full karate outfits. I don't know what they're doing or why they're there. They're just faintly in the background.

You can see that people wearing karate kimonos or whatever are greeting people at the door of this art show. How do you know that your bad as an actor? The speaking spell has more emotional depth than it's voice than you do. That scene happens where they're down there and trying to get to the pool and they're sneaking around the cameras.

Everybody has such big 80s hair. Donna mostly that there's no way that you're sneaking underneath that camera. They can definitely see your big fender quaffes and shit poking up the top. Well we see all the ice and stuff freezing everything up.

I just wrote down all of Arnold Schwarzenegger's jokes from Batman and Robin. I just, you know, I seriously have the microphone. You know what killed the dinosaur? The ice, like I just was bored.

I had nothing else to do. I was watching this movie. This movie's terrible, but it is making me hungry for seafood. That was some good looking seafood they had set up there.

They hungry for an icy because it's a shallow fake ice everywhere. So Tanjina is introduced, super happy about that. She is the most unintentionally hilarious part of this movie. Is her necklace made of tiny guitars?

Is that what that is? I was not paying that much attention to her necklace. No, and I was watching it in kind of shitty quality. So I think they were tiny guitars though.

That's what they look like. Anyways, we're down at the pool with Donna and her boyfriend and they get into the security office and she changes the monitor, the one that's monitoring the pool to skip back like two hours and just keep repeating, you know, an empty room and stuff. You know there's fucking children that live in this building, Donna? Okay, what if one of them fell in that pool and fucking drowned?

Nobody would know and that was adorable. She just got the crush. Yeah, absolutely. Donna's just got the vapors.

She really is not not thinking clearly. So when that scene happened, I'm like, oh, it's like speed. I believe Keanu says I saw this in one support of guys. Also spoilers for speed.

I believe that movie was called The Bus That Could Slow Down. Donna is like, I forget what her and her boyfriend, her and Steve are talking about, but she just keeps saying no and Steve really aggressively is like, yes, Donna, yeah. And it's like, he won't take no for an answer. I'm like, what is this fucking creepy?

Does this make me uncomfortable? Things were different back then. Yeah, back in the 80s. So no means no business was just that's much later than Poltergeist 3.

Maybe Poltergeist 3 was one of the reasons why they decided to do no means no. Well, I want, can somebody from our audience get a picture of Steve looking really creepy in Poltergeist 3? And I just put the words, no means no and then hashtag consent is sexy underneath that for you. So I really appreciate that.

So in vision this, you're trapped in an isolated hotel. You're there with your friend who's a writer. He seems to be a little bit off-kilter. You approach his typewriter.

And on the page, all you see are the words, Carolanne. Carolanne. Carolanne. You're repeated over and over and over.

You're like, imagine being friends with a dude that really would be like, hey, bro, has that script for Poltergeist 3 gone? Oh, it's good, man. It's good. I got 20 more pages done today.

You just pick up the pages. Carolanne, oh, it's good. It's such a piece of crap. Why are we still talking about this film?

I'm so done with even the concept of having spent time on this piece of crap. I have so much more notes left. Don't get interrupted. I'm just, I'm going to get through everything.

I will be laughing, but not commenting. All right, fine. So I need to get a doctor in here. Can somebody explain to me, can you survive having three inches of ice and crusting your upper body and skull?

And as well as the inevitable concussion that you got for running headlong into a fucking window, is he going to survive that? I don't think he's going to be OK. Who cares? Who cares?

Steve can die. Does Steve ever come back in the end of this movie? Yeah. Oh, my gosh.

Steve makes it back. No, no, because when the family, it's just Tom Scarrot, Donna, and Carolanne that come in at the end. We left Steve in the spirit world, guys. Well, no, I thought he came back in that ice and he was like, normal Steve.

It was just Donna who wasn't normal Donna. No, no, because they're mad at you. They're both wrong because they like start smiling and laughing or something. And he rips their fucking face off and then they do it.

Yeah. Yeah. So dude, oh my god. This movie totally forgot about Steve.

Steve. No. Steve. He's still running around going like, Carolanne.

That's both guys for us. Like, you forgot me, Carolanne. You left me behind. Dude, dude, you're like, I'm Sam Rockwell as Steve.

That's why he's so pissed off at the ghost. I lived in the spirit world for like 20 years before I got out. I've tired of these fucking ghosts. They don't pay the rent on time.

They're shitting room. Now there's a scene between Steve and Dr. Satan and Steve goes out. Steve goes, we went down to the garage and they fell into the puddle.

They pulled him through the puddle and the guy goes, but what puddle? And Steve goes, the one in the garage and the other guy goes, whoo. I'm like, what? What the hell is he?

He's repeating it for me. Did he? He's repeating it for me. Wow.

I'm allergic to how stupid this movie is. Yeah, we're all having crazy coughing fits. My lungs are falling. He's so garbage.

Full of ice and fog machine fucking. Tana has a great, great line. She goes, what do you want? Tweedled dumb or Tweedled dumber or Tweedled.

Do I seriously have to keep watching this movie? There's so much of this fucking movie. There's a bunch of bad ADR where it makes Tana's mouth look like it's not moving even though words are coming out, which is kind of ironic because she looks just like a ventriloquist dummy. Let's just agree to the fact that truly her second best time on the screen was definitely getting murdered by Leslie Burhing behind the mask.

Yeah, pretty much. She did get two nominations for this movie though. Really razzie nominations. She got both a razzie nomination and a Saturn award nomination for her boys and boys.

Also they're synonymous with each other. There was that scene where we're trying to pull the ant through the door and Tana is like, I can't believe you didn't realize that that wasn't Carol and then we get this scene where she's talking to Carol and the mirror and it takes her five fucking minutes to realize that it's actually Reverend Kane. Like who really eating your fucking words here? I mean, Tana.

Screw you. I'm a little confused on the timeline here. What came first? Tana and Jana from Poltergeist 3 or the California Raisens because...

She smacks into that mirror. Oh my God. I rewound at like four fucking times. That was too funny.

Oh, that was too funny. Did not see that come. That was pretty great. That was really funny.

Yeah. Do you think that that was like a fucking Zelda was just like, I'm done with this shit. Like I write me out of this movie, write the fuck now and then like, all right, we're going to slam you in this mirror and then we'll just real quickly have someone in the effects team throw together some shit and just whatever. We'll get it done.

Guys, we don't really have an effect for this. You guys got any dummies in there? Yeah, we just throw it under a heat lamp for a while. Oh my God.

Oh my God. Oh man, it's such a piece of crap. I can't remember what these are grabbing at this. It's so fucking bad.

But Scott, for real, all the effects were tough. Girl, that. So do you guys see this ancient shaman necklace? Well, one time I just saw a teenage girl explode out of an old woman's bed.

The movie's pulling a Dr. Giggles. Oh, my God. That's only one of those movies.

I still have more notes. Okay. So have we made it clear that Donna and her boyfriend Steve are ghosts at this point? No, we haven't.

Well, Steve better rip a big fucking chunk of her face off then. That'll help the audience. We're Tom Tom's. We don't fucking know.

This is the point in the movie where my suspension of disbelief was broke. It wasn't the coffee mugs we talked about earlier. No, it was not. There's the Tom's carrot and Robocop's partner, whatever her name is.

Oh, that's actually her her full name. That's her full name. Her name's Robocop's partner. They're in that.

They're in the spirit world. All these, all the everything's covered in ice. They're in the parking garage. Tons of ice all over everything.

The sensitive disbelief breaks when the cars immediately start up and start driving. No, I've seen cars that without ice over. Reverend Kane would have been at that thing with an ice scraper for like an hour before he ever even fucking got it started. Yes, it's almost what the Canadian one comes to.

So ice damage. Also, I've never seen number two. So Reverend Kane with like his hat and his outfit and shit, he just looked like an Amish guy to me. So I was like, why is he driving that car?

Is that like strictly forbidden for them to be driving cars like that? Yes, it is. Okay. So I'm going to save his life or take him into the light or whatever, which, hey, by the way, Reverend Kane, turn around.

It's right fucking there. You could have walked there by yourself the whole time. Anyway, so she said something like, I have both the knowledge and the power to help you get there. Trick fucking question, Tana, knowledge is power.

So you're a little convoluted in your speech there, aren't you? That's it. That's all I got. That's what we're done.

We don't have to talk about shit. That's anymore. All right. Oh, man.

I'm not like taking the poop. A safer Ontario means more police and prosecutors making sure my car doesn't get stolen. It means building new jails that keep criminals behind bars. And it means there's no need to worry when I play at the park.

We're making every corner of Ontario safer to make all of Ontario safer. That's how we protect Ontario for all of us. Learn how at ontario.ca.ca. Safer Ontario paid for by the government of Ontario.

We're making an ad. Napping. This is where I think if we're doing it right, Alec Baldwin comes in. He says a couple things.

He listens to podcasts every week. Has he been cancelled? Was Alec Baldwin the one who killed somebody? I hear Gary Sinise is free.

Okay, great. He's a work since 2020. So what would be the scripts that we would have Gary Sinise for the Napping through happy hour podcast? Listen to the damn show.

Damn it. And having through happy hour podcast brought to you by GeekSoup. Real life, real drama, real time. I'm very serious.

That's the ad. That's the ad. That's the ad. All right, so Scott, what did you watch this week?

Oh man, I watched the final girls and it was really fun. All right. Well, yeah, we're not going to really get into discussing that right now because we're probably going to spend 45 minutes discussing in a couple weeks. I've just been watching Gravity Falls and I've been enjoying that a lot.

It's a lot. I don't know. Is that really a chair? No, unfortunately.

Well, actually, fortunately, no, it's not related in any kind of way, shape or force. It's a cartoon. It's on the Disney Channel or something like that. In Canada, our rating system is a little weird when it comes to children's show.

So we have something called Youth 7, which means that seven years old and upper are allowed to watch the show. Some of this shit that happens in this show is 10 times scarier than anything that happens in Poltergeist 3. So I don't know if I'll talk to you. Yeah, that's really not a thing I'm saying much.

I don't know why you'd let small children watch it. But I've been enjoying it a lot. It's a lot of very adult humor. A lot of horror references and sci-fi references.

So I've been really liking that a lot. I would suggest it to anybody that watches a lot of cartoons. So I've got a couple quick ones. Did you just close yourself back up into the body bag, Adam?

Oh, sorry. Everything will be explained in one second. So we're just moving that we watched the 1980s roller disco musical The Apple, which was only made more amazing to me when I, after everyone left, popped in the documentary Electric Boogaloo based on Adam's recommendation. And there's a huge chunk of that doc dedicated to how much of a massive flop the apple was.

Yeah. Well, I don't know that anybody, well, they expected it to be a success, but they were riddled with cocaine psychosis at that point. Dude, that documentary is pretty fucking fantastic. I'm so fucking good.

Like really everybody needs to watch it. Like if you like bad movies, you're going to love this just for the fact that they take all the worst movies that they ever made and condense down just the best scenes of shit. So you get to watch all these bad movies all condensed together. It's so fucking good.

Oh, I mean, you know my love of bad movies. I have such a long list of films that I need to see from watching Electric Boogaloo. There's sequence about the greatest of all the Superman movies. Quest for Peace is phenomenal.

But finally, the movie that I watched this movie is the Quest for Peace. That's Nuclear Man, part four. Oh, God. We've already talked about this before.

Yeah, but Matt called it by its full proper title, The Greatest Superman movies, Superman Four. Quest for Peace. And then was the TV version of that movie one? That was on Grace American Hero, right?

Yeah, pretty much. Same production level. But did they take an elevator to the moon? Seriously, one of these days, we got to do like once a year, just one non-harm movie and I'm all about doing an episode on Superman Four.

I will not watch it. I'll just like go on my five year, I think my seven years since I actually watched that whole film. Anyway, if we open up the floor to that, there's going to be like vicious fights about which movie we've got. So the last movie I watched this week was called Tantira Killer Shark.

I love Killer Shark movies. I heard about this particular one being particularly interesting in its awfulness. And it's really, it's a Spanish film. And it's about these two dudes who just like managed to convince American tourists to have three ways with them over and over and over again on their houseboat.

But like every single time that they bang a girl, she like goes for a midnight skinny dip and gets eaten by the same shark. And then they're by like this shark's eating above our bitches. And like this, I saw it and kill it. But like it should be like a comedic short film, but instead it's a two hour long drama.

It's ridiculous. I don't really recommend it to anybody. But you know, I watched it once and that seems to be enough. You're a true masochist when it comes to watching shit movies.

Yeah, well, I mean, I may have forced my masochism on the two of you for next week's movie. Fuck you saw. You're so bad. We won't say anything about it until it comes.

I hate you so much right now. There's a fucking reason that I'm drinking because I'm trying to really get ready for that one. Oh god, you're going to be drunk for a week. That was Porter Guys 3 everybody.

Thank you for listening. Don't forget you can send us suggestions on what movies you think that we should be watching. We're going to send those emails to hmnpodcast at gmail.com. Now we're going to settle.

Vital. They're going to get us. We will be having a special Halloween episode next week. We won't say what movie we're watching, but you will see it on Saturday.

We're releasing it that morning. Halloween morning. There will be an episode waiting for you. I'm looking forward to it.

So come and check out the next week's episode of Horror Movie Night and don't forget. Please send us suggestions. Send us emails. Tell us about your Carolands and how much you Caroland your Caroland.

Carol the ends out of them. So send those emails again at hmnpodcast at gmail.com. Hello. You.

Alright. Hey, fuck those. You. Are you guys ready?

Yep. Alright, you fucking this intro is so ridiculous. Do you need a second to go? No, we're going to see how this goes.

I'm just going to read this thing. Yo, Scott. Scott, can you hear us? Scottie.

Oh, nothing. It's not. What the shit? Where are you Scott?

He's writing back on a second. Can you hear us now? Was it you making that sound? No, that's Scott's stuff.

Where? What the shit's going on? Did he just get home invaded? Oh, dropped out back in.

Scott, now you hear us. Stop making those noises. What is going on? It sounds like a murder over there.

Alright, I can hear you now. Okay, what the fuck? You just get polter-guys here? Is that what's going on there?

Dude, I was getting some ghost sex. Don't worry about it. Okay. I was like, what the hell?

We just hear like, doors closing and like, it's like a weird thing. That was me climaxing. Oh, okay. Come through the mirror, Scott.

Come to us. Be on the podcast. Okay, okay, I want to say I'm this entire fucking episode is Carol. Okay, you guys ready?

We're making an ad. This is where I think if we're doing it right, Alec Baldwin comes in. He says a couple things. He listens to the podcast every week.

Has he been canceled? Was Alec Baldwin the one who killed somebody? I hear Gary Sinise is free. Oh, okay, great.

He either works as 2020. So what would be the script that we would have Gary Sinise say for the Napping Through Happy Hour podcast? Listen to the damn show. Damn it.

The Napping Through Happy Hour podcast brought to you by Geek Steve. Real life, real drama, real time. I'm Gary Sinise. That's the ad.

That's the ad. That's the ad. You're listening to the Geek Steve Network. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.