Psychology and Chronic Pain: A Conversation of Kelsey Bates

Most of us are taught to think of physical pain and mental health as two separate things, one handled by a doctor, the other by a therapist. But for the millions of women living with conditions like endometriosis and chronic pelvic pain, that line doesn't exist. The pain is physical and emotional, and the years spent searching for a diagnosis, being dismissed, or feeling betrayed by your own body leave marks that no scan can pick up.My guest today works right at that intersection. Kelsey Bates is a licensed mental health counselor and the founder of New York Women's CBT, a practice built specifically for women navigating chronic illness, chronic pain, and the anxiety and grief that come with them. She specializes in endometriosis and chronic pelvic pain, and she brings something to this work that you can't get from a degree alone: fifteen years of living with chronic illness herself. She knows what it's like to fight for answers, to grieve the future you thought you'd have, and to find a way through.Her approach blends what's called third wave cognitive behavioral therapy, things like Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and Dialectical Behavior Therapy, to help women change their relationship with pain and build a life that feels meaningful, not defined by their diagnosis.Today we're going to dig into the psychology of chronic pain, what's actually happening in the mind and body, why therapy can help even when the pain is physical, and the practical tools that make a real difference. Kelsey, welcome to the show.