Radical Honesty and Radical Changes

Dr. Tamy and I changed our lives by embracing authenticity and vulnerability. We left our former professions (she was a plastic surgeon and I was a pastor) to become writers and coaches. We made that choice because we realized it was healthier for us and more helpful to others to share how we dealt with challenges similar to theirs than it was to keep our personal struggles private. Personal struggles that I’ve faced and had radically honest, in-depth conversations with other people about include:* a severe depression that lasted for more than a year and almost killed me * the very unexpected and painful job losses my husband and I experienced in 2020* the financial and other challenges of starting new careers in our 50s* my dad’s death in 2021 * the loss of self-esteem and challenge of separating my self-worth and productivity* the best way to respond to cruel and dangerous government actions I abhorThe most important thing I learned from going through those struggles was the importance of choosing the right people to support me. Honest conversations with people who helped me discern what I really wanted and trust myself to know and do what was best for me were incredibly valuable. Honest conversations with people who claimed that they knew what was best for me and said I should do what they advised me to do instead of what I wanted to do were incredibly harmful.If I could go back and share what I know now with my former self who was hurting, vulnerable, and desperate for relief, this is the wisdom I’d offer: Consult your inner compass, not someone else's map, for directions. And get support from people who will help you trust your inner compass to point you in the right direction and your ability to go wherever it is pointing. DM me on Substack for details about how I provide that kind of support or schedule a free call to discuss your specific needs. Get full access to Changing Lives at wendigordon.substack.com/subscribe