RE 161: Where Does Sobriety Stand on Your Priority List?

Today we have Ryan, with over two since his last drink. Today's Sponsor: Café RE If you haven't done so already, make sobriety your number one priority. It may seem selfish to prioritize yourself over other things, but to really be present and of service to our loved ones and the community at large, we must take care of ourselves. When we root ourselves in something real, concrete and bigger than ourselves, our daily struggles and problems often feel small by comparison. "Everything's going to be okay as long as we don't drink." SHOW NOTES [9:10] Paul Introduces Ryan. Ryan's been sober for over two years. He decided to quit after a trip to the hospital. He's from Dallas, TX. Works for an ad agency. Has a 3-year-old son. Has a dog. Is currently focused on raising his son. He and his wife enjoy scuba diving. [12:45] When did you first notice that you had a problem with drinking? It began in college. He noticed it affected him differently than other people. He experienced withdrawal symptoms early on after casually drinking. A trip to the doctor put things in perspective for him. The doctor asked him to quit for 30 days, and he realized that he couldn't stop. [17:41] What age were you when you realized you had a problem? Late 20's. [18:10] So what happened from late 20's until now? He tried many different things. A therapist diagnosed him as depressed. He was medicated. They assumed the problem was something other than alcohol. He drank while medicated and had a psychotic episode. He cut out the medication but kept drinking. He had a week to himself and he drank the whole time. His anxiety increased dramatically. He started hiding his alcohol from his partner. [23:20] Did things change when your child was born? Eventually. The morning he found out his wife was pregnant he tried to quit. His drinking got worse. As the due date approached his fear increased. He made sure he had emergency alcohol nearby in case they had to run to the hospital. His worst memory from drinking was being drunk for the birth of his child. He kept drinking after the birth. His wife got involved and tried to help him quit. He continued drinking even while seeing his therapist. Finally went to detox and felt like he was saying goodbye to his best friend. He did an intensive outpatient program. Joined AA. Started working the steps. [32:05] Talk to us about the time between your treatment and your sobriety date. He relapsed once. He learned that a relapse happens long before your first drink. He thought he just needed time, but he learned that his thoughts lead to his relapse. He began hiding liquor again. It came back in full force. He realized what he had given up by going back to drinking. [34:35] So how did you end up quitting again? What is your recovery like today? The relapse made him realize that he was powerless over alcohol. He stepped up his commitment to AA. He found sobriety groups to be a part of. His family responsibilities fuel his sobriety. [37:00] What was it like to include your partner in your sobriety? It was a great decision. It tested the relationship, but they came out stronger. She quit drinking as well. [39:10] What's on your bucket list in sobriety? I just want to be my best. [39:40] What is your plan in sobriety moving forward? It's all about making the next right decision. Focus on what one can control. [40:45] Rapid Fire Round What was your worst memory from drinking? Did you ever have an "oh-shit" moment? During his last relapse, he realized "I don't got this". What's your plan moving forward? What's your favorite resource in recovery? His family. This podcast is his favorite. What's the best advice you've ever received (on sobriety)? "KISS". Keep it simple stupid. What parting piece of guidance can you give listeners who are in recovery or thinking about quitting drinking? If you can do this, you can do anything.. and you can do this. You're gaining more than you're giving up. You might be an alcoholic if... you end up in the hospital because you didn't drink. Resources: Sobriety Tracker iTunes Sobriety Tracker Android Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to [email protected] "We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up, we can do this!"