RE 608: Find Your People

Today we have Lani. She is 38 years old, lives in Salt Lake City, UT and she took her last drink on June 9th, 2026. This episode is brought to you by: Soberlink – sign up and claim your $100 enrollment bonus Sign up and get 10% off: Better Help [03:05] Thoughts from Paul: Earlier this year David from episode 142 sent Paul the song Find Your People by Drew Holcomb & The Neighbors. Paul's first reaction was "holy crap, this song was written for Recovery Elevator". He rebranded the Bozeman Retreat into Find Your People Retreat and with the musical accompaniment of Uprise, the group sang this song every day. The message within the lyrics reminds us that the opposite of addiction is connection and when you ditch the drink and find your people, your brain will heal. Your liver will send you a thank you card, your dopamine system will rewire, and life will smooth out. You've heard so many times on this podcast that sobriety is all about recovering your authentic self, than you need to find yourself, and you need others to do that. When you find your people, then you find yourself. [07:27] Paul introduces Lani: Lani is 38 years old and works in the juvenile justice system, providing trauma-informed care to youth. She has a dog named Chip, a partner named Audrey, and enjoys hiking, kayaking, yoga, gardening, and spending time outdoors. Lani grew up in Utah in a home affected by chaos and her estranged father's alcoholism. Searching for belonging and structure, she became involved in the LDS church. She began drinking in high school despite promising herself she wouldn't follow in her father's footsteps. After leaving the church around 2010, alcohol gradually became a bigger part of her life, eventually progressing to daily drinking. In 2018, after graduating from college and recognizing that her relationship was toxic and her drinking was out of control, Lani planned to become a flight attendant. After drinking heavily, the night before an important test, she failed and felt something needed to change. She moved to Dallas and attended an AA meeting, where she found a sense of belonging and met her first sponsor. She stayed sober for about six months, even living out of her car and tent for a period while working and attending meetings. After moving back to Utah, Lani relapsed. Over the following years, she moved to Colorado and back to Utah, changed jobs, and experienced more difficult relationships. Despite periods of sobriety, including nearly seven months in 2024, she repeatedly returned to daily drinking. In October 2025, Lani went to treatment after a frightening experience involving alcohol and travel. She continued drinking after treatment, eventually reaching another breaking point during a trip to Seattle. After returning home, she tapered off alcohol to manage withdrawal symptoms and returned to an AA meeting on June 10th, 2026. Now 78 days sober at the time of recording, Lani is learning to let herself break, accept help, and stop pretending she is okay. She struggles with the concept of a higher power but is finding meaning in meditation, journaling, daily meetings, and connecting with nature. She is also learning to give herself permission to rest and allow recovery to unfold one day at a time. Lani's parting piece of guidance: Be patient with yourself and just try. There's no right or wrong way to do it. Invite someone in. Don't do it by yourself. There are people that are willing to talk with you about it. And if that's where it starts, let it be that. Recovery Elevator We took the elevator down. We got to take the stairs back up. We can do this. Café RE RE Instagram Sobriety Tracker iTunes RE YouTube