Redefining Success Before the World Does

For years, success has been measured by degrees earned, income achieved, titles held, and recognition gained. But what happens when those markers keep shifting, leaving people exhausted and unsatisfied? In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy Koch wrestle with a growing cultural question: If we don't define success for our kids, who will, and will they like where it leads them? Drawing from a recent EdSurge reflection, the conversation explores how achievement based definitions of success often move the goalposts endlessly, leaving even high achievers feeling behind. Dr. Kathy challenges parents to recognize that children are always watching, not just what we say success is, but what we live as if it is. Our calendars, conversations, sacrifices, and celebrations quietly teach our kids what matters most. Rather than anchoring success to prestige or productivity, Dr. Kathy reframes it through a Christ centered lens: identity in Christ, lives marked by abundance rather than accumulation, and purpose expressed through service and sacrifice. Success, she argues, is not about becoming impressive, but about becoming who God created you to be and stewarding that calling with competence and faithfulness. Rooted in the biblical story of Bezalel, the craftsman called and equipped by God, this episode reminds parents that Scripture celebrates faithful skill and obedience far more than status or acclaim. When children are taught that success means living with integrity and purpose before God, they gain clarity in a world eager to define them by outcomes alone. This conversation invites parents to reclaim the definition of success, not as something to chase endlessly, but as a life of abundance and faithful stewardship.