Retrospect for life

Knowin you the best part of life, do I have the right to take yours Cause I created you, irresponsibly Subconciously knowin the act I was a part of The start of somethin, I'm not ready to bring into the world Had myself believin I was sterile I look into mother's stomach, wonder if you are a boy or a girl Turnin this woman's womb into a tomb But she and I agree, a seed we don't need You would've been much more than a mouth to feed But someone, I woulda fed this information I read to someone, my life for you I woulda had to leave Instead I lead you to death I'm sorry for takin your first breath, first step, and first cry But I wasn't prepared mentally nor financially Havin a child shouldn't have to bring out the man in me Plus I wanted you to be raised within a family I don't want to, go through the drama of havin a baby's momma Weekend visits and buyin J's ain't gon' make me a father For a while bearing a child is somethin I never wanted to do For me to live forever I can only do that through you Nerve I got to talk about them niggaz with a gun Must have really thought I was God to take the life of my son I could have sacrificed goin out To think my homies who did it I used to joke about, from now on I'ma use self control instead of birth control Cause $315 ain't worth your soul $315 ain't worth your soul $315 ain't worth it