Robert Pattinson Got Ghosted By His Own Stalker

Laura is headed to Cannes and may or may not accidentally end up in White Lotus season 4, the Solidcore guy somehow gets even weirder, and the JP Morgan “cannons” lawsuit continues to spiral into one of the funniest workplace scandals on the internet.This week, we get into:Men paying for fake cauliflower ear surgeryRobert Pattinson getting ghosted by his own stalkerElon Musk losing his OpenAI lawsuitThe scientifically hottest male dance movesCatholic school “mixers”A law associate asking if hanging an original Picasso in his office is too obnoxiousWhispering Angel rosé discourseWhy women absolutely do NOT want fake cage fighter earsPlus: ringworm in the Bahamas, White Lotus filming chaos, and the return of “leave room for Jesus.”