hi hi it's the acquired taste podcast i'm bethany sitting here with two of my best girlfriends kathleen hi and sam hi ladies hi um so this week we wanted well first of all we had so much lovely feedback from our last episode the um what would you tell your 15 year old self i think a lot of really important stuff came out it was kind of a different episode for us a little more serious than we've done before right there were so many feels by the end of it i was winded yeah but you know what it was kind of refreshing because life is serious and you do have to take it seriously yeah and i think that you know i think that if i was 15 and i had heard a group of people being honest about their struggles like that would have been really i think helpful so hopefully somebody heard it and it made a difference for them go ahead and open that water bottle sam i keep seeing this article online where the woman uh drank a certain amount of ounces of water every day and changed her life i want to believe that's so true she drank like two gallons of water every day and she has never been better she's like wearing a diaper because there's no way you can not pee all the time i know no it's not so i want to talk to you guys this week about bad date horrors um because yeah i do um because there's some good ones and uh and i know that we all have at least one story um i when i was living in minnesota there's a coffee company that competes directly with starbucks i won't say what it is but i want to travel um but i was at that establishment and the barista uh handed me my receipt and then he was like oh wait there's something missing on that receipt and i said what he took it back he's like my phone number oh my phone number on it and uh hand it back to me i know that's kind of smooth actually i like to give you extra foam too obviously so uh this was years ago this is when i was still living in minnesota so um he hands me the receipt and whatever he's cute so i called him and we ended up going on a date now this is when there was a movie that had come out and i was showing like a theater that was randomly showing it it was called coffee and cigarettes and it was this art house film yeah black and white art house film and so he invited me with all of his buddies so it was like seven guys and then me and you go see this movie and then after the movie it's pretty good we go to perkins because that's where you go after a date and um i'm sitting with all of his buddies and they are just the foulest human beings like they're just telling horrible derogatory jokes about women and like bitches and talking about like crazy girlfriends just not even caring that you know a crazy woman bitch girlfriend or whatever they want to categorize it isn't their presence yeah they've never met before and you're in a tough situation because even if you like the guy you can't get up and say hey i'm not into this conversation because you guys are being gross because then forever and out even if you have a great connection with this one guy to his friends you're the crazy bitch exactly want to listen to them pal around exactly and keep in mind like this is okay there's no public transportation so he was my ride so i'm stuck oh so afterwards um he was like you know let me take you home and so he gets puts me in his car he locks the doors you know that we call them the date rape locks we go could you get all of them locked and you can't open it he starts driving home and we're a pretty significant distance away from my house and um as we're driving home he tells me how he um at one point had been sent to military boarding school by his mother okay and i was like oh you know that's crazy why did you get sent away oh i sexually assaulted my girlfriend okay so now i'm getting in the car so it's like 11 30 at night it's pitch black all around me i'm in a part of the city i don't know in a car with a guy who has admitted to sexual assault and then we get to my house and uh and he leans over and he tries to kiss me and he has over the period of the evening a giant herpes sore has started to form on his lips everything is wrong yeah and he looks at me like he goes can i give you a kiss oh this isn't herpes no it's leprosy don't worry it's not it's not her and i said oh and you know no thank you and i got out of the car luckily that was the worst worst worst date i've ever been on that's awful it was really bad this is for you that's terrible that's literally my worst nightmare yeah the herb the herb and sexual assault right like why do you admit that sexual assault and misogyny you had a trifecta of a date going on it was terrible why do you admit that on a first date especially you know uh this is i have this thing with people and i used to do it too it was such a crutch when you first meet somebody new you open with a story that makes you look kind of badass oh yeah and which is what he kind of did uh telling you that he went to military school and i at this point in my life i don't respond to stories like that yeah yeah you know i just i don't think that that's cool maybe i did once upon a time but there are people still like you know throughout their whole lives they'll maybe there's wonderful things about them that you know they volunteer they help animals and the one thing that they'll tell a stranger is oh you know i was arrested once for xyz yeah that's at that one moment the fines yeah i mean that's everything that you do regularly that's one blip that's sort of trend where people introduce themselves to someone new or they go on a date and the first story they tell about themselves is you know when i was 10 my grandma fell and i was there for her and i helped her up and i called the emts you know something like that right my family i never tried to kill or rape anybody that'd be neat that'd be neat wow first all i think that's the first time i've heard neat you generally in like a decade someone called me out on using her neat uh yesterday on twitter that's neat i like that bring it back old school your outfit is very sharp looking i like your slacks i like your younger age so anyway kathleen we know that you've been wifey for a while yeah you met me at a very young age yeah but has there ever been in your dating period something that you did that you did that you're like uh-oh there's likely trouble when i was a freshman in college i had this boyfriend for a pretty short period of time like three months or something four months the pre-nail period yeah the pre-nail period and i understand when you're in college you're very very very poor and so like you know what do you go on a date you like maybe go to the movies you know movies now are crazy expensive back then they were still expensive i used to go to target target yeah or you just like walk around hang out listen to music especially when you live in the dorms well this guy and i my boyfriend at the time i was like let's go to starbucks let's go get coffee and so we went we walked to starbucks and i ordered my drink and i didn't expect him to pay for me like it was very 50 50 back then um and he didn't order anything and i said well are you gonna like we're here why don't you get something like i'll buy it for you right and he goes no i'm okay um i have this coupon for dunkin donuts we'll go there after oh so i proceeded to spend the night um sitting at starbucks drinking my coffee as fast as i possibly could yeah like it's awkward because i couldn't wait to get out of there unfortunately on the way back to the dorms the dunkin donuts was there and i had to go in with him like hey give him the middle finger and walk away like you're too cheap to buy a cup of coffee and sit with me and talk with me and you're awkward so it's like that's what's really weird to me that's the weirdest part is you were you were polite enough to be like hey i'll get you a coffee and he's like no i'm gonna wait to use my coupon i think in general on dates even if you're in college coupons are maybe not the best idea to use on a date unless you've been together for years yeah maybe a while because i think something similar happened where he invited me to a movie and then it was also 50 50 i paid first and then he paid with a free movie coupon oh my god oh no right and that just felt a little weird and i brought it up i think actually to the big show not terribly long ago and they were all like yeah it's fine that's not that's not weird that's not fine um so at that moment i knew that this guy and i weren't gonna work out we continue to date for a few weeks after but yeah you're looking for the out after that i mean it's been like 13 years since this happened and i still remember him as the guy who used the coupon you're still not over it but yeah there's other things that's fine what about you sam i feel like you have 100 unfortunately i kind of do um shoes stand out the most though so i was dating this guy for about two years and he we were in college and he was like saving up for some really important moves in his future so he did not pay for me for things which i was fine with and then he got this job and fell into a crap ton of money from it thankfully yeah and um invited me over to his place because he got a new space and he was painting i was with him i helped him like take shellac off of wood i was painting with him like it was such a fun date he was showing me off all these like cool things that he like got himself and everything these 200 boots he was so proud of and then we went out to surf taco not the most expensive i love surf taco i was very excited he orders his and then goes to pay for it and right before he like hands the cashier the money he humiliates me by going oh you did come over and help out um did you expect me to pay for you too no in that same exact phrasing and i was i got furious i was so angry like the fact that you have to ask that i did all this you just bought yourself so much stuff and you're not gonna take your girlfriend out to lunch right now and you're gonna have the balls to announce it in front of people the cashier was embarrassed for me yeah i was like nope i can continue paying for myself and i did and it turned into a problem yeah it was we did not last much longer no i'm actually glad he said that so other people could see what a douche is that was so uncomfortable and he didn't have any expressive like oh crap on his face afterwards like he just thought it was the most normal thing that's one of those moments when you wish you were holding like a cold drink so you could throw it in their face i took my satin glove and i slapped him across the face with it have you guys ever thrown a drink in a guy's face not for real really not for real i wasn't i was doing like an independent film where i got to do it but i've never actually got to do it for real have you kathleen um you know i haven't but in eighth grade this guy was teasing me and he would take my lunch and run around the playground and i gave it back to me finally i opened it and my gogurt you know there's like two yogurt had come open a little bit so uh he like he walked over to me um and i put my gogurt in his face but you know what like five minutes before i put my gogurt in his face he's like i think you have a mustache oh oh my god it was not a good day it was a really bad day for 13 year old kathleen good for you for scoring gogurt all over now sure a waste of a gogurt damn that was strawberry please don't say yeah it was strawberry banana i actually i did embarrass myself once though pretty badly on a date we were at oh god all of these terrible memories are flooding to me right now okay breathe deep between your legs this was all right okay so we were at a bar sitting on the high top tables and i'm a short person so my feet aren't touching the ground they're like swinging back to me i'm a little child and he said something smart assy and to try and be funny i went to like punch him in the shoulder which i do pretty regularly but i was drunk and the high top table chair was lovely so like i went to punch the shoulder and he moved the slightest amount and i missed and i fall off of my stool like the woman in the back of the chair behind me like i am so sorry there was no recovery no like we just laughed and i didn't know him that terribly well so it wasn't something we could make fun of each other for for a long time like he just accepted the fact that i was mortified after like periods of strong laughter i hate being embarrassed i like that's the dumbest thing because no one likes being embarrassed but i will cry if something embarrasses me i will go i'll laugh it off and then i'll go home and just cry what was the last thing that you did that embarrassed you so much that you were really feeling it um it was our christmas party this year because um everybody was leaving and i was sitting on a barstool and it was the end of the night and i had been pretty good about like measuring my drinks um and so scary one of our producers was leaving i leaned in to hug him and he pulled away but i was still holding him so i slid off my barstool and the barstool crashed to the ground and elvis was like oh bethany's wasted and fell off the barstool and like sat on the air the next day and everything i was so embarrassed because that's not what had happened right but everybody thought that's what happened and so i was i was like so upset you heard it here folks that's not what happened it was not wasted erase erase the thoughts of that show it wasn't what happened yeah um recently elvis our boss took us shoe shopping i mean so generous and i got these amazing heels and i came back to the office and i'm showing our co-worker greg t i'm going look my shoes are so amazing he's going those look cheap those are discount shoes and he walks by my desk again and i'm on a conference call and i thought i was on mute and i said to him i'm gonna take these shoes and i'm gonna shove them up your ass and then i hear snickering in the background here and then i just said out loud is my mute button not working someone was kind enough to tell me no my mute button was not working and i had to kind of backtrack a bunch of higher up i love that good for you luckily there's just people with good sense of humor on the call oh my god oh wow i'm like nervous because it's been a long time since i did my years you both of yours was kind of recent yeah a long time since i've embarrassed myself enough i'm scared now but they can really stick with you i mean it doesn't matter how long ago it happened they can really stick with you forever i did have one from camp when i was about 10 or 11 years old we was actually this i see it from my point of view yes it's sticking with me still i was leaving the dressing room after swim time and everyone you know their camp groups are like in straight lines and they're walking by me and it's like a movie everyone's quiet and staring at me i'm like what the hell and i look down i forgot to put my pants on i had them draped over the locker i ran back in no one was laughing everyone was just like oh my god i'm just gonna remember this in a long time she's gonna be talking about this in her adult years one day in a podcast camp is so fun man to be 11 years old again to be 11 years old sans pants yeah those are the days i never went to camp but i met him so a lot like i saw on the disney channel yeah keep that going for me would you mind it was yeah we did i went to space camp um which was on it was a commercial nickelodeon it was also mary kate ashley movie and i was so i had to go so when i was 13 i was given space camp and it's a week long it's in alabama there's a couple there's in florida too and it was the best time of my life what were you what was your role mission control oh i could totally see you doing that and you get to like go into this contraption that makes you feel like it's anti-gravity and you got to um we got to scuba dive and build a probe underwater yeah it was actually really fun really really fun do they do space camp for adults or is that just called nasa oh we could get in either way i think they have it for adults i'm almost positive that they do i think that we should legit do that because i would very much like to but i would never pass any of the exams to actually become a student we can make a vlog we can video it for the podcast now i get really sick in weightless situations i know this shut up then maybe you should be like the physical therapist for the astronauts every time i'm in a weightless situation whenever they happen those anti-gravity chambers are just so accessible these days when i walk through a hallway and all of a sudden i'm on the ceiling can you imagine if like you had to focus on gravity but you're the only one everyone else gravity was a thing but you no one knew that gravity didn't apply to you so you constantly had to focus on it these are things i worry about what would happen if you got distracted and you hit the ceiling you're outed and now you're in charge of making sure everyone in the room with you never tells your secret what do they have on you we need to call mel brooks because bethany just wrote a screen it's about a movie where some people have to think about involuntary actions yes and how it affects their lives totally imagine having to think about blinking you're just walking you're like blink now blink now blink now you're talking to somebody and you're like okay now this is time to blink i'm blink now that's part of twilight it's like because vampires don't blink that's right she's like blink well you know um i was recently watching he ledger as the joker and he does this thing where he kind of he puts his tongue out where he's like licking his lips and he did it because it made him seem more crazy um and that's kind of like it's kind of like forcing yourself to blink he would be talking and going through a scene and then he'd be like okay tongue out now tongue out you know it's crazy have you guys ever seen that movie yeah yeah so take note of his tongue next time you watch i wonder how deep in the character he i mean a 180 i mean a i mean a god i mean a 45 that's charming how the british say maths by the way yeah we do have to go but there's a thing where like i guess if somebody overseas says math everyone else goes like to fill in the ass oh they hate me there oh yeah it's back at them i misunderstand they don't hiss they're just like going do they also say arithmetic i would hope so yeah that's a great word maths arithmetic i'm just gonna take that as what i learned this week that's mine i learned this week that they say maths they do they say maths that's fine yeah i'm done all right kathleen what did you learn this week i learned nothing yeah yeah i mean my brain was just kind of shut off um no i learned that in hathaway it was really charming in the movie the intern with robert de niro i mean the interiors in that movie are really beautiful of course definitely yeah if you guys have the opportunity to rent a movie this weekend yeah rent the intern because it's so cute fabulous I learned this week that even though I always say wedges are the sneakers of the high heel world, because they really are, you really don't wear them flying. Because I wore them flying on the way home from West Palm Beach this last weekend. And I watched so much in them that the next day, do you remember when I texted you guys and said I thought I had the flu? It was because my body was so, like, my muscles were so tense when walking in heels all day and carrying heavy weight.
Which is a cheat for you, because you wear heels more than the average person. Yeah, absolutely. All the time. My muscles were just, like, tense.
And that was why I thought I had the flu. So don't travel in heels, even though they look fabulous. So I said I had the flu, I meant I had the Chanel. Yeah, exactly.
When I see someone at the airport in heels, they always think they're famous. Right? Yeah, I think they're crazy. Like, that person's important and famous.
Yeah, they probably are. Or they're like me and an idiot in wearing heels. All right, thank you so much for listening this week. We love you so much.
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Tweet us your thoughts at Acquired Podcast. And we're on Instagram at Acquired Taste Podcast. Thank you for the save. Love you, Kathleen.
Bye, guys.