and welcome back to live forever podcast I'm Steve I'm Dan what is up not is not a thing man yeah we got a little upgrade this week from the Miller high life and Steve Ronis today's podcast is brought to you by the letter C C's for Corona and Cervaisa yes last service on my scene yeah whatever that is I'm just told me I did it means I think that I think that means very fun beer I think that's a very fine fine the beer is fine yeah the beer is fine my spine mulch oh fine man I didn't think I knew a whole lot of Spanish like I've always wanted big courses so I tried that oh it's not babble what's the one with the little owl oh I have that actually that's what I'm trying to learn German I don't know the class but it's like free yeah and you get so much more stuff than like babble gives you for free yeah babble gives you like four sentences maybe we should reach out to them and see if they want to be a sponsor right since we can't remember their name that's terrible what the hell is it it's the one with the owl yeah I know what you're talking about because it's my computer damn it I'm gonna look it up now where's this fucking how I think I took him off here shit yeah I'm like German was what I was trying to learn and it's cool because I actually did spend the like I think it's 20 bucks they give you like a free pack gives you quite a bit yeah I spent the 20 bucks and it's one time deal and it just unloads everything yeah I think the same thing actually so much fucking information bro like it just everything it's amazing it's fun to learn I mean you know how you can like basically like test out of the first however many lessons yeah like I tested out of like I don't know the first 30 lessons of Spanish and then I took German in high school just one year and dude I tested out of way more German really yeah I mean I could tell it to you now I was reading it that's probably the biggest difference is in the test it's multiple choice yeah a lot of words look similar look you know especially German is basically you know Chia is you know it's just got a little accent right to it and you know yeah it's the congregation that's weird right what one of my favorites is a voice mine who didn't like where my dogs at what so vo meaning where so there's a lot of like that one is who didn't right that was a hundred well it's it's like the slang version so what voice to mine who didn't is where my dogs at it's not like where is my dog it's not that yeah where's my dog's it like and again if you took all the words that you tested on and you passed and then had somebody walk up to you and just say those words you think you would understand them not naturally speaking if they spoke slowly I could get what they're saying French to actually I tested out of a shitload French I took three years of that actually four years but it's it's funny like it's really difficult to just like speak it off the top of your head but reading it like oh yeah this and this is this and this is this yeah it's I mean I could survive ramshine has helped me out a lot I listen to a lot of ramshine folks I'm thinking my keys off my head oh damn it yeah my podcast listen to it's always saying like yeah I know no Spanish to work in a kitchen right I mean I can I can shoot pool in Spanish I can order beer in Spanish find out where the bathroom is find the beach do a link a high duo lingo what's that that's the yeah oh okay duo is the name of the yes yes yes yes yes and he's an aggressive little bastard man I had to take my home generic version because I don't really have the al talk to me very much just like a owl he doesn't talk to you but but he does make you feel bad he'll send you notifications like where have you been it's been two days like I got a life motherfucker I'm trying to like do English stuff I ain't got time for no Spanish and French and French and I for your shit duo get out of here y'all how many licks does it take to get to the center with tippy pop for real we're not sponsored by a duo lingo we'd love to be totally not an ad sorry about that yeah try do a lingo next week's podcast will be brought to you by a duelingo we will do the whole thing in German so go on there this week get your application and learn it before next week forward slash pop Steve yes oh my god so I'm just gonna throw this out there just so our listeners know what a wonderful day it is to be on this podcast my week has been total dog shit and I've been looking forward to just coming here in the studio talking to everybody have our wild banter just to fucking release this shit man let it go crazy we this is a safe space I know that's what's weird is I was all my way over here and I was like I don't want to be like one of these millennials but like today the studio is definitely a space a safe space for me sanctuary it's my sanctuary and I enjoy it you know I mean it may seem a little conceit but I enjoy babbling and running my dums about shit and having people listen to us and well I don't think that's pretty cool I don't think anybody starts a podcast it doesn't like to hear themselves not yeah that's true although I have a hard time listening to the show sometimes but I've been forcing myself just to try and get better sometimes it's really weird like it is there's there's sometimes when I'm listening to our show and I do listen to it that I'll start listening to it and I'll start anticipating what's gonna happen next right I already know what's gonna happen right right but like you said it's good to listen to it all the way through because you pick up a little minute thing sometimes it's like oh I could set this better right you know right well it's encouraging to because a lot of times plus it makes our numbers look great three more on the list does three downloads good job guys no I mean there's there's a lot of times where and you know honestly not since you join the show to be real but there's a lot of times where I'll get done with an episode and I'm like man that was fucking terrible so it's encouraging sometimes you go back and listen to something that I didn't think was that great and I'm like hey you know what that's not a bad truly and you know what it's funny because like when we started you were telling me like there's a lot of times that will record and they'll just be total scrubs and I don't knock on wood like I don't feel like we've had a episode that was kind of oh just one well yeah the one that we shot up yeah we won't even say the name of it actually there too but we don't want to talk about that one either yeah that one will be paid subscription she'll go on super well but anyway back to your shitty week let's hear about that yeah man so a lot of people didn't know this you know about it but tomorrow I'm supposed to have another back surgery and it's gotten postponed and it's a whole lot of politics slash red tape bullshit to go through to get this thing going so I've been dealing with that yeah if you didn't know Steve got so much bullshit in his body that if you ever met Darth Vader he'd be like check this out dude right yeah oh you lost a leg did you die did you die white and I tell don't all the time my girlfriend I'm like you know when I do pass on you might want to stop by like the junkyard first so they can pull the metal out and you might get a couple bucks out of the metal is just a catalytic converter next to your heart right but a machine now that man exactly which is funny after they put the plates in my chest that's what I posted on Facebook hell yeah I'm on machine now that man hell yeah and I'm like only my cool friends are gonna understand that fuck yeah but then I've had these weird ass debilitating just fucking night terrors man like where I fucking die on the table again fucking die but like this time for real die and I'm running around the first like I had to back to it was actually the night of terror if you want to call it that I had three fucked up dreams the first one was I died on the table and then I'm running around just like trying to move shit to like make people aware that I'm there what which was you know it's totally irrational like why the fuck would you we're all swazied out like you're like you have to go meet the weird guy on the train like how do I move so I make coins up the wall so that was just like I'll get a potters wheel for you bro yes so you can come back and rub your hands and I noticed Reading did that song what on shame LED yeah no that was righteous brothers okay okay so yeah that was just weird and not only was it just you know sad because I died but it was frustrating because I'm trying to do these feats and I can't do it the second one was like a fucking game show about my death like I died and then people were like trying to guess where I was or what it was so weird it was it like if this is your life game show from like back in the day so weird and that was just frustrating and then the third one completely off the cuff no idea this might have been something that I ate before I went to bed but it started with being chased by a predator trying to kill me and then I became a predator and I was just fucking everybody up so yeah and by predator he doesn't mean like a giant cat he means like from the movie predator yeah that's a pretty good one dude damn the many talents of Steve we'll never know get to the chopper so yeah insane yeah it's so weird how the game show like I was the object I mean it was like it was almost like forcing me to try to move things it was tied into the first one in a way yeah it's like but people knew I was there I don't you said they were like prove you that prove you there oh they went from me trying to prove it to people asking me to prove it and I couldn't produce the the action that they were looking for yeah like what was that show with that fucking grifter what was it called crossing over yeah yeah like you're like you're an invisible ghost on crossing over and they're like oh yeah well Steve if Steve was really here he'd be fucking shit up so fucking shit up Steve let me see my beer disappear me that would be the sweetest fucking ghost trick to pull on somebody just like just go drinking somebody's beer like if you're just sitting here doing the podcast and we're like man I wish Steve was here and then just like yeah that would be I don't know that Brent and I would be able to ever do a show again if you just put an extra beer out just leave an extra beer pour one out for Steve so yeah and I mean initially and primarily in my soul I'm not really like scared to die I'm not scared anymore but it's like when it's presented in such a frustrating way yeah it's kind of like you know oh we're gonna let you die but you're gonna be fucking tested and you know just spend the rest of eternity in frustration which I'm not digging that I'd rather just go to oh it's got all time or whatever I thought I'm going back to back to yeah I feel like that's definitely just anxiety dude and you know and running through because I mean that's what we do that's what people do it's you know you run scenarios through your head yeah exactly what I mean with the thought of surgery coming up which would have been tomorrow you know and like you said it's probably just a whole big pile of shit that I was riding on yeah because honestly man I think that's what intuition is I think our brains are constantly running test programs of reality like hey maybe you know thinking when we're not thinking in our subconscious and it comes out in dreams sometimes right I think it's just constantly running like what if programs and that's why sometimes you're like I feel like I shouldn't do this you know I mean there's a conscious thinking about it but you're like I shouldn't get in the car right now yeah and your brain is just like yeah because you didn't sleep well last night and you're hungry and you're distracted so you're jumping when you can't see it because it's got the cloaking device which I'm on board for yeah yes so now that I've got that off my chest or in your chest yeah what is it what is the shit that you said they're trying to remove from your spine um it's it's stenosis basically so what it is is build up inside the disc and it compresses on the nerve your spinal cord that's fucked up yeah and in order to do that they do what's called a laminectomy so on your spine the little bones that stick out the top right those are your lambda and laminectomy is they actually cut that off and I've already had one whoa I've had a laminectomy with a cyst removal right below where they're gonna go in and cut the next one out damn so is this from all the other shit or is this dude related to the work you've had done genetics it could be a million things that's true that's true I feel like this happened right years right after it so like right after your last big surgery you were cool for like a little while yeah so I remember because like didn't you start going to the gym again and shit that was that was actually after my heart attack and I started at the place we worked together and it was like I felt like a million bucks yeah I was working out I was going to the gym March 31st which was just the other day I see my Facebook that's when they went and that was 2020 right that's when they went in and did the next surgery that's because I was working for a convergent when the neck blew out and that took all the all the wind out of my sails yeah sorry about that um stick the wind out of your sails like all the work that I had done at the gym and everything else it kind of just like oh yeah yeah but you know okay so I guess I'm thinking of the more recent one where you did got more work done so that was then then May of 2021 I had my lower back surgery with the cyst that's right okay so and I feel like that literally for a while the weekend I've had a surgery fucking every year yeah because you were like man I'm feeling good but I feel it still feel kind of tingly but I'm hoping that's gonna go away well then it was like oh well now I can't fucking move yeah again said fuck you we're not going to operate me there it's kind of like you can walk and shit but yeah but what's really weird is and I mean I'm sure there's people out there that do it they just get used to a certain thing yeah and I have that problem and I shouldn't consider my past health issues whatever whichever I want to go into because in my mind weaknesses intolerable yeah be a weak bitch but um the uh my thought um surgery your neck yeah yeah so plates and you start feeling um a certain way and I just kind of ignore it and yeah it could end up being something like bad and that's what I did with my neck when I you know because I ended up blowing two discs out on that one yeah you know and I should probably went a lot earlier than I did but in my brain I'm like big project boo boo boo got to stay on the job keep it going and the end result is you end up fucking yourself up so my advice to you listeners is if you're feeling like things aren't right go get that shit check you're probably not right and you're only gonna end up fucking yourself oh yeah it's totally true man it's and it's totally a dude thing to do it's just like it'll be fine I'm a big storm man it'll work itself out I'll be fine and then you're like fuck I only have two fingers take my strong hand man I didn't think about it just now but you're you're almost a good case for predestination like that you can't die before you're supposed to right because I survived enough you survived a lot of shit and I wouldn't say that you've done it all with clean living no like by all accounts you should be dead absolutely like probably more than the twice that I already got into my belt like I should probably have like five or six more times oh at least easily just just from reckless behavior I am you know it's so weird like and it's a it's a I don't necessarily want to say it's like an ego thing but you know whenever a person sits back and like oh man I'm all fucked up and then like you see somebody else it's like way more fucked up and you know like they're doing you know they're doing their thing they're still you know producing or whatever right but it's like you get everybody's like fucked up is work you know not worse but is individual it's an individual thing oh yeah my fucked up is worse is different than your fucked up yeah everybody's got their shit man you know so that's it's so weird you know I stopped judging people a long fucking time ago exactly man like obviously I'll still react to dickheads but most of the time once I cool off or hopefully even in the moment I'll be like man this dude's probably got some shit going on yeah and so you try to be cool to him like especially on the highway see somebody like me going 110 miles an hour I'm like motherfucker then I'm like well you know I don't know maybe his mom just went to the hospital maybe he's got to be sure yeah maybe he's got to yeah I mean I have made some we've all been erratic moves on the highway when you know speaking of the highway have you seen that video of the Ford truck losing its front tire and then a Kia soul gets literally fucking launched and flipped in there is insane it guy live dude but you're gonna have to show me that after the show because obviously this is yeah the funniest fucking thing is it's like tire comes off the truck Kia soul hits it flips in the air crashes the tire rolls away somehow comes back and just hits the car again like I felt like the tire was kind of coming back like fuck you bitch gotcha it's like that uh you see that the video that the Asian chick that's like pissed off at some sort of market and she tries to like throw her food in the bowl and like she somehow throws the food up in the air and drops the bowl and then the food drops back into the bowl oh shit no way yeah like and then she's walks away like I meant that shit right and that's how people become tick-cock famous for real from weird shit like that I mean speaking of destiny mmm I feel like we're about to change the subject segue segue segue do do do do right I mean a sound effect for our shitty segways right but mostly because I don't think we've done it yet I kind of want to talk about King Arthur because it's the ship it's a great story it is it's one of the one of the oldest stories really tells us about truth justice being good and incest and fucking your mom having a fucked up kid that wants to kill you so I don't know when when you were exposed to it but I definitely read some fairy tales magic dragons I mean obviously anything that was anything like that as a kid I was drawn to yeah and I'm sure that's where I was first exposed to it I think for me it was probably good old Disney with the sword and stones oh the sword and stones great dude so yeah I mean even now it's still kind of cool like is it is still kind of cool I would probably skip some of the musical numbers yeah but like the fucking talking owl which I think it's kind of funny that it was our communities yeah who's an inventor but it's actually not too far from the story no I mean at least part of it yeah I mean the beginning part before like all the nights and oh yeah but you know the whole sword and stone and all that can be in the kid pulling it out and that's the sword that is so there's quite a few different sources you know like going back to British history so it from what I understand a lot of the legends came from different places there are a lot of different stories poems songs and it was still today even today there's people that are coming up saying you know they found this stone with markings on it and you know a crevice in the center where the sword could possibly been and it has some kind of historical reference as far as like where it was found and the writings that were on it oh yeah I mean it's like there's highly debated books but there's one that's called like the history of Britannia where apparently some of the battles that Arthur fought like they claim that these battles were real and one of the battles Arthur himself was not like reported to have killed like 900 dudes by myself by himself and of course the accuracy of that is debatable but but I mean it could be I feel like just like any other myth or legend or you know fable if you will there's got to be a touch an ounce a pound of truth sure like I'm sure there was some guy like a King Arthur there had to be somebody like that I didn't actually dig into that part of it too much yeah I mean because we've been soaked in movies and oh yeah well and what's his name Sir Thomas Mallory made it a lot more accessible for everyone when he wrote more darther right which is you know kind of a collection of and you know like a bridged version of all these other tales kind of all combined into a seamless you know yeah like one long epic story which I think is pretty cool and I think that's probably where most people get all the modern stories from that's kind of considered the source material I think when I was a kid we had a book that either got out of the library or with just a book that we got yeah that kind of went over very lightly the King Arthur and right you know gonna be here and all that stuff you know I can remember reading that continuously because it was a cool idea of cool concept oh yeah cool this kid you know he pulls a sword out of his throat he becomes king you know then he's got these cool nights and he makes a round table and oh yeah then all the nights have their own little individual stories yeah exactly but did you want to you want to go over more darther a little bit just as a background that'll be your show because I don't really know what more darther is so oh I promise you you know the story I'm sure but like to have actually but eyes on it so Britannia as it was as it was known at the time you know lots of warring factions and that this is all just from more darther by Thomas Mallory so there were a lot of warring factions a lot of separation and then there was this dude Uther Pendragon who according to the story was like the first like true king of Britannia right great Britain whatever you want to call and so he let me think how this goes so he's banded together several other like lords or you know leaders yeah other you know kings war chiefs whatever you want to call him and he starts basically taking over the country and then he was the lord of Cornwall or no his name was Cornwall he was the lord of like Titian or something like I can't I know what a titties that's my title so thank you anyway so Uther goes to like parlay with this Cornwall dude right right and he runs into dudes wife and he's like little I want to hit it infidelity action going on yeah but you know the wife was honorable and was like no I'm married how could I possibly do that I don't sleep with anybody but my husband let me get naked and so they end up going to war right so she tells Cornwall that you know Uther hit on her and he's like fuck that you know fuck you up and Arthur's like you're not Arthur Uther's like bring it it's on so he's about to fuck them up somewhere along the line he meets he meets Merlin the magician yeah jinx and he's like yo I went up with Cornwall's wife and Merlin's like cool this is what we do we're gonna launch an attack I don't know if it was on Cornwall's castle or one of like an adjacent kingdom or something close to it and so they start this battle over here and then Merlin transforms Uther and a couple of his boys and himself into the likeness of Cornwall so he can like sneak into Cornwall's castle and bang as a lady and she realized doesn't realize it's him right at all and Merlin's like okay I'll do this but you have to give me your firstborn child and of course Uther's a fucking horned dog he's like yeah yeah whatever whatever he's like I'm horny man like you can ask for my pinky toe after this right whatever whatever sure and the interject I think like from that point on I can kind of pick up where where starts going from there exactly because of a it was the cliff notes in the form of a video video I did that right there by you look at that so then so they have this illegitimate baby yep so while he's banging the wife Cornwall is actually killed and then it's kind of funny because she still doesn't realize that it was Uther right and she's like I don't understand how this could have happened excuse me I was I was just having sex with him last night it's kind of weird that he appeared to me and fuck me weird I mean isn't really like in today's time it would be like yeah today's time that would be weird even worse defense guy could be like what's it really like your husband you knew who was a battle come on right like I could get that bitch off and I'm not a lawyer but like the reality of it is she knew that wasn't that motherfucker but I know it fucks the story up sorry oh no problem I'll get back on my milk well I'm I'm probably butchering it because I'm doing this off from memory anyway no actually I'm picking up what you put down because like I said I remember this part because of the movie ex-caliber which I love it follows that story because it's pretty close dude but yeah I remember like dude what you know the one scene homies like you know this is not my child and yeah yeah Merlin shows up means like I'm taking a baby you man I should probably look up his name to give him credit but the dude that plays Merlin and ex-caliber yes I love that guy he's so and he's like energized and he has such a range as far as like he's kind of comical a little bit fun little comical but also just like the overacting is awesome he's like what do you think this will be the way just like everything silver the top in and I believe that has like some metal like he wasn't spawn he was the the old yeah yeah the old hobo spawn yeah yeah yeah yeah shit that was him yep anyway sorry no problem so anyway Cornwall dies Uther wins obviously and he like courts Cornwall's wife and they end up getting married okay like right then and so the D son yeah so then she's pregnant has a baby and he like comes clean he's like yeah remember that ghost dad that was me that wasn't Bill Cosby right even though it's kind of the same thing really well you know what's really weird I was actually getting ready to throw this out there the similarity of this story with so many others oh yeah the story of Hercules Zeus came to release mom is something else this one or whatever you know which I don't know many chicks that are you know fucking swans but whatever happened back in I agree I would mention that it's almost and it's not Troy the story of Troy yeah you know it wasn't necessarily like changing into anybody else but he snuck in a book wasn't there's some shit without doing that too Odin did that shit all the time he was like yeah I'm gonna fuck you as a pro go and you know transform out and go and do his thing he have thing for you and chicks yeah what up your own I heard you like dogs giant bitch right so yeah I mean but I feel like that whole that whole idea of and maybe that was their way of saying oh infidelity maybe necessarily wasn't their fault because he could have transformed into someone else well that's the weird thing about the story is like when she finds out she's fine with it she's like that's why I say she knew oh well that's great because I love you so much and actually was not weirded out at all when he's like also I promised our kid to Merlin and she's like okay that's the way it goes damn isn't that weird that's bad so then CPS is coming to your big surprise the baby is Arthur and Merlin takes the baby and I don't remember how it's almost like he had something on him or something but he takes the baby to a director and actors oh yes sir actor yes sir I was like yeah he took the baby to director and I'm like what's director and his son Kay and a lot of people remember those because those are also Disney characters that's where the story picks up in Sword in the Stone yep and so it's the same idea he's raised as an orphan with director he knew that Merlin brought him but I don't remember if he like forgot or if he owed Merlin something because I don't understand why unless he was just a righteous dude who Arthur no sir actor I understand why he just decided to like cool I'll take care of this fucking kid that nobody knows the whole concept of you know I think sir actor was a righteous man who I think so too and I think Merlin already knew the prophecy of what was gonna go and how that's a common theme in the kind of like I know what's gonna happen I'm gonna give Arthur to a righteous man that's gonna teach him right you know it's not gonna be an easy life because he was a server right he was a servant to him and they treated him I agree with that actually now that I think about it and why I think director was a good dude so picking the story back up at some point Merlin gets with the Archbishop of Canterbury and tells them in this town and I think it was in London right but in London in this churchyard has appeared a stone with a sword embedded in it with writing saying he whoever pulleth this sword shall be the rifle King of England and they're like bullshit so he gets all the bishops and should to come to London they see the sword it's still like they're still like this is bullshit yeah we don't believe you so they're just off having their own little you know combo combo having a little bishop party meanwhile I got I got I got some new felt on this one some extra point is in yeah hi hi yeah man I saw I saw a trash can the other day and I was like I'm gonna wear that on my head look at the bishop of New York he's got a traffic coming in here but back to the story so they uh all right children sit down same time there's a tournament going on yes in London there's a tournament I don't remember what it was for but a director in K or in town is a tournament isn't the tournament to just say fuck it and we're gonna decide who's the best warrior to be the King I think that's what the tournament was about I think that's what they said in store in the stone I don't know if that was I don't know if that was part of the original story but that could be I might be possibility being misremembering so anyway there's this tournament and so Arthur's an orphan and he's basically K's little bitch right K forgets a sword for the tournament you know it's jousting and fighting and what have you and he's like dude get my sword so he runs back to the tent he can't find it can't find that shit sees the tour the sword in the churchyard pulls it out with ease doesn't know anything about it brings it to K K acts like he pulled it and that's where I'm thinking Merlin was right because director didn't believe him right this is his own son right his own son has no reason to lie to him but but he also remembers Merlin bringing him this little kid and he's like I know you told this little dude to go get you a sword I know you're fucking lazy ass didn't walk all the way back to the church yard and pull this motherfucker out just so you can have a sword for the tournament stick that put it back so maybe it wasn't right to do maybe just wasn't stupid right so they all go back and I'm glad that they reduce this in like every other depiction but they actually have like a three-day like fucking whatever pow wow about this sort of the stone deal because nobody believes it yeah so Arthur's just like whoop whoop in the stone out of the stone in the stone out of the stone no problem I got this somebody else touches it they're like it's like fucking Thor's hammer and marvel like right nobody can budge it somebody got that shit maybe I don't know if that's part of the north mythology that anyone else can see where you know I don't I haven't read myself personally yet anything that states uh so you know Terry just finished it and I think I'm gonna borrow Neil Gaiman the guy that wrote Sam in and a bunch of other cool shit he wrote a Norse mythology book she said it was really good really I'm gonna check that out but anyway so back to the story long story short they finally agreed like okay he is the king most of them join him but he's still a kid so a lot a lot of people are still kind of pissed at him let's see like a kid back then was like in your 20s well no it's the opposite I'm sorry and adult was in the 20s well no you were 20 years old if you were a woman at 20 or even 18 or oh yeah you're not married yet bitch you ain't ever right I'm surprised that I'll be the first one to tap on the baby bladder oh yeah the corona's got me yeah I thought you're gonna go a totally different direction there no and I figured you were up all right we'll be right back and we're back so anyway that's that's kind of the the beginning of the story after that we see Arthur like goes to battle and kicks lots of ass goes to his many lessons yeah like he only has like a few supporters at first they're like he's sent by God and he you know has this fucking killer sword from the stone that seems to have its own power and we have slots asked depending on which version there's always the lady of the lake which to me seems like an added bonus of the sword like oh yeah well you were mentioning Excalibur before they kind of alluded to that so I can't remember the name of the guy but in Excalibur there's the scene where he fights Lancelot and like won't give up yeah that's yeah yeah so he like uses the sword badly right so in more darther it's very similar it's a different night it's not Lancelot it's like but is it the green line now it's something with a P I can't remember his name but it's a lot pedicrew yeah mr. pedicrew yeah like the dudes like just camped out on a road and was like fucking come at me dude do you worst yeah like and Arthur doesn't like to give up because you know he's like the chosen one and he fights him till his sword breaks right and then in the original story and in the movie he gets Excalibur from the Lady of the Lake but they kind of make it in the movie like it was always Excalibur and in the original story like he breaks Excalibur well no the first sword wasn't Excalibur really yeah so the sword in the stone was its own thing the sword later belongs to the Lady of the Lake that's Excalibur that's Excalibur yeah well and then wouldn't that that would kind of concrete in the idea of he's out learning things he's I mean obviously a little humility oh yeah patience those types of things that make yeah there's a bunch of that shit for sure and when he broke the sword that was him learning a lesson like you can't just fucking go at it like you know you're trying to rip a fucking tree out of ground you got to learn humility and know when to say when exactly as to be a good king yeah and similar to both stories he and like in the movie he and Lance a lot end up being homies well well at first and then in the book Merlin's like so he comes back with Excalibur ready to fucking kill him right and Merlin's like yo this dude is actually super cool we're probably gonna need him later and Arthur is like my rat out of this one slide yeah and but Excalibur in the book is actually super cool too it does all kinds of cool things like at one point it like blinds a bunch of enemies just like holds it up to the Sun mmm reflective light yeah that's funny I mean if it's gonna be a magical sword it should have you know all the attributes of a magical sword oh yeah apparently he couldn't like and then another thing the Merlin teaches him is he's like okay if you could only have one what would you have the sword or the scabbard and Arthur's like well the sword of course he's like well you're just gonna carry the sword around all the time check this out the scabbard is magical as well as long as you wear the scabbard you cannot lose any blood from your body what yeah so the scabbard is magical also yeah fuck the sword I'll keep that which is pretty cool yeah fuck yeah so fast forward so then Arthur has you know the Knights of the Roundtable he gains you know the following of so many others and they all have their own little adventures and shit and that's such weird like I know they they have and I'm sure somewhere there's a compendium of stories about what those nights did and their little adventures yeah I mean the Mallory book does have some of those but it's expanded on greatly yeah which I mean movies and movies and books and all kinds of stuff my vast knowledge comes pretty much exclusively from you know the little bit of books that I read when I was a kid and the rest of the stuff is pretty much all movies yeah which one's your favorite movie yeah it's a definite throw up between Excalibur and King Arthur legend of the sword by Guy Reaching legend of the sword that one that one I feel like is visually my favorite take on the story was that the one where he's got like those giant machines attacking at the beginning no it's fucking giant elephants yeah yeah yeah yeah like Arthur's still a child he's like a baby right and fuck who's like the bad dude wizard I don't remember in that one I think Mordred is the bad wizard like it's a guy instead of a girl instead of Morgana okay they make him up it's just a guy and I forget like Uther Pendragon's brother is shady he's like learned some wizardy shit from this bad guy they don't even show Merlin at all but he just goes over and like straight bucks shit up I forget in the story was Morgana Arthur was daughter or sister okay sister okay according to like the movie Excalibur which you know that one was that one was edgy for its time because like Morgana comes in and puts like a sleep spell on him and like basically jumps his bones and has his kids so it's incest kid that yeah I think that was part of the story too I don't remember how it all plays out but so Morgana's also like like Merlin a witch or wizard or wizardy bitch whatever you want to call her but she basically plays the same trick on Arthur that he played that Uther played on corn walls yeah like turnabout's where I play yeah so she pretends to be Gwynnevere and hooks up with Arthur and then Gwynnevere has one of your things better or maybe it wasn't maybe it wasn't Gwynnevere Morgana has Arthur's kid yeah yeah yeah yeah and that ends up being Mordred yeah I was way off there for a second I was just saying that Morgana was hooking up with whatever I was looking at you like a puppy dog just hurt a whistle like what doesn't make sense then what are you talking about but yeah that was and and then similar to Arthur she doesn't she take Mordred away yeah oh totally and then trains him to be like you need to hate your dad and go fucking up later on and like he's I don't know but I feel like he's got some kind of little bit of a magic power but I know he's got like yeah yeah yeah yeah he ends up having like like like almost like a killies sort of and Morgana like powers like she can't be killed or some ship Morgana like fucks Merlin up and he's all trapped and stuck and you know he's out of the pictures so she's like totally fucking up all of King Arthur's dudes they're all out on the quest for like the Grail you know that's the premise of that movie is in their scallopers he's like I need the Grail in order to you know regain my strength and my you know energies and da da da da so he sends all these nights out and they're all getting fucked up and killed and the only one that finds it I believe is personal personal yeah you're right and he finally gets the fucking Grail whole Percy takes it back to King Arthur he drinks from it then miraculously like Excalibur comes back to him and it's like well they all take a big fight to Morgana kill his own son doesn't doesn't he somehow get Excalibur back from Gwen of your in the movie not Excalibur in the excalibur movie oh that's right because she goes to the combat yeah because she goes crazy or whatever no she well after she fucks Lancelot yeah he gets caught and like stricken with grief she goes to the content just in case anybody was wondering yes there is definitely two balls I could have done without the dudes the dude but like Lancelot stands up and it's like not sacking ass and I'm like I gross yeah man yeah but he did I mean King Arthur showed a great deal of restraint like he had Excalibur right there ready to just get both of them and he's like fuck it he just stuck the sword in the ground oh that's right they're like stuck out in the woods yeah and he wake up and there's like Excalibur stuck in the ground right next moment so Lancelot he goes crazy and like becomes a priest or some shit and she runs off to a nunnery and after he finds the grail he finds her in this nunnery and she's like I save this for you for all these years and pulls out Excalibur so you're right yeah yeah and then they don't know how that made sense but yeah so weird apparently it's like the fucking sort of Gryffindor and it just comes out whenever you need a which like I said man legend of the sword has some fantastic like visuals giant fucking snakes man like when he goes to the black aisle I guess is what they called her the you know the Shadowlands right he's got to be like tripping on Shrooms bro because like giant fucking bats coming out of the fucking sky and giant snakes and wolves and all this other shit finding like him his own skeleton there what yeah it's like one thing he sees this like bracelet on a scale it's like his it's like he's a digga but yes he's got to go in the channel and find his own darkness what do you think about that maybe maybe Star Wars we think about the Star Wars comparison well let's so think about it you know it's taken away you know raised by you know raised by you know somebody else a different family member he's an orphan he only kind of like learns who he is when he gets his father sword you know what maybe that's what it is Star Wars is Excalibur in space space out there that makes total sense total sense I mean definitely an influence sure there's got to be a little bit of that in there and like he's walking around with his sister a little bit you know that that all you know that adds up oh yeah yeah there's a little insight I know how like babies together man can you imagine you never know if it was like an incense baby with all those weird creatures that's why they didn't do it oh that's just a fucking alien I mean obviously there was the kiss in Empire but I mean can you imagine if you would hit it and then later on they're like that's your sister bro there's there's some gaps in there like they didn't have they didn't have Luke and Lee and the film together like all the time there was sometimes where they were it could have could have been good good maybe I mean we don't know what happened that jail cell and maybe that's not weird in space maybe probably one time over time so right it was just like oh fuck it we'll just I'll take the kid raising the haters father and you know like most fucking bit I mean sorry but I think and this is the part where I started to get foggy on so I think Mortar ends up killing Arthur I think it's a one I think it's a one be one like they both kill each other and like like that means anyway the Mort darther isn't that French for the death of Arthur maybe I'm not French more it means dead or dying or death so the death of Arthur yeah kid so she named him basically kill your dad I shall name you know I mean that's the name of the book oh is it yeah yeah the the one by Thomas matter oh so just like one long story about the death of Arthur got it but they have they have so many movies man and now I read speaking of you know all shoots I read somewhere that there's some folks that believe that the Arthur stories and homes and shit started out as like pamphlets and they were used to rouse interest in the British Isles for the Crusades okay to ignite down the join the crusades yeah because you know they create the Grail legend and you know the legend of King Arthur like oh well this is like an important quest so we need to support these dudes going to the holy land I don't know if that's true or not but I read that somewhere that could have been just propaganda like the whole story could have just been brought me I basically like medieval Q and on yeah I think as a whole the the stories and the you know even the movies or whatever how we put it together not necessarily the movies more the stories but I feel like they're all lesson plans like if you read it it's not about it's a it's an adventurous way to teach somebody aligors to be humble to be yeah you know it's all your his fables yeah you know so that's not a lot of more yeah it's like all right so how we're gonna get these kids the stuff for some sisters you know I mean obviously if you fuck your sister kids gonna grow up and hate you and fucking try to kill you right eventually well I mean that maybe maybe not with the the incest part but oh I'm sure that shit was rampant it's a classic samurai story right like right if you kill somebody's parents you better make sure you kill those kids because those kids are gonna like go off to some like Chinese monastery learn kung fu and come back and wreck your ass to get it that's like the classic samurai story so realizing all these different fucking tie-ins like Star Wars and I mean a million other fucking stories are probably tie-in and mirror the whole ex-caliber legend what's the you know it's almost like the what is it five shades of bacon or five shades of bacon yeah where you do a oh okay six degrees of Kevin Bacon I was thinking you were talking about like actual pork oh like the five shades of bacon so there's crispy there's not some crispy there's that floppy kind of grizzly one that nobody likes and then like just wet bacon just straight raw bacon yeah sorry that's my old age I don't know about all these things sometimes but yeah like it all ties in to what that's what I'm saying is it the scalliver story yeah oh are you talking about similarities between all of these different movies yeah they're all basically telling the same fucking story oh yeah like beat humble be you know be a good person yeah that's like the King Solomon frizz that there's nothing new under the Sun like that every story is already been told or you could go with like there are certain archetypes especially mythology like there's always like if you ever noticed in like any action movie or anything that would qualify as like the path of the warrior right there's always an arming scene yes like there's always arming of the warrior is a classic thing in mythology anyhow they all have it where it's like fucking John John Wick yeah I need guns lots of guns about the new John Wick I heard it's dope till they all subject is it out I don't know if it's yeah I think it is out yeah I heard it was pretty good but I don't know who I heard that from so and I'm gonna say this because it's one of my favorites I would like to think it's everybody's favorite what's that you can't talk about the King Arthur right to the round table ex caliber without talking about Monty Python and the search for the Holy Grail oh hell yeah dude that is probably top 10 in my like spoof movie collection oh how I do just fucking everything about it's fucking great we found a witch may we bound her we have a nice and say neat yeah it's you must bring us strawberry we may have so many great unique Iggy Icky Icky Icky Icky ah I fucking General direction right the black knight ah it's merely a blouse yeah it's just the scratch my fucking just got his arm the fucking holy hand grenade right the fucking bunny that kills. Oh, look at the fangs. Yeah, it's a three riddles.
What is my favorite color? Yellow. You're wrong. It's so it's so funny.
And then the way they break it down is like the tail is so personal and I can't remember the one the brave Sir Robin. The one that goes in and like just kills the entire wedding party. I don't know which night it was, but it was like the dude was trying to get out of Marianist chick. Obviously it was a little light in the loafers.
Right. She shoots an arrow out the window. He finds it and he's like, I'm going to save this damn so I'm just going to stress and he just runs in and he's like killing the wedding skills. Everybody races to the top and it's a dude.
And he's like, what multiple listeners yelling at the radio right now? And he's like, dude, it's this part. Sorry. Sorry to me to kill everyone.
Yeah, it's fantastic. Good movie. What a what else? Well, I can tell you my least favorite.
Oh, was first night that had to be my first night. Yes, with Richard Gere and Sean Connery. Oh my God. That movie sucked so fucking bad.
I don't really remember it, but I remember the movie. I don't remember seeing it. I know I have and was mad about it. Yeah.
I mean, like they show in the commercials all these action scenes and there was some action scenes, but it dude, like King Arthur played by Sean Connery. He's going to marry this chick that's like 40 years younger than him. Right. Settled down finally.
I mean, he was he was still pretty hot at the time though. Yeah, I mean, back in the day he was. Yeah. That was like right before like the rock.
Yeah. I mean, he was he still had it. Oh, he I mean, bitches. He's like, I don't care.
I don't know how it was when he died, but there was probably like younger chicks ready to drop. For sure. Well, at least until he started losing it. Yeah.
You ever seen any of those interviews? That shit was said like towards the end. Talking about most sometimes you just got to stop a bitch. Oh, man.
Some of those old Bond movies where he's just fucking decking women right in the teeth do. Yeah. He didn't give a fuck. I feel like that used to be a thing, man.
I feel like people just used to hit women or it just wasn't that weird. I mean, there was a time obviously when like women didn't have a voice and I mean, I'm not saying that's a good thing at all. But I'm not saying that I think women should have a voice. But unfortunately, in our history, there was a time when, you know, the woman there was a time in our history where men were right.
Yeah, it didn't matter. It's not like that anymore. Sometimes I feel like it was like mid 80s, men stopped being right about things and we weren't allowed to hit him anymore. I mean, he's still can.
I don't know. So I'm kidding. I do. Yeah, I know.
But yeah, you may catch a catch a target on that shit now. Yeah. And that's a it's so sketchy to you. You know what I got to do.
I got to do with the slammer, bro. What I just got to say it. We here at the Live Forever podcast do not at all condone or promote the hitting of women and or children or not. Absolutely not.
We're not violent dudes. No, unless. And basically, bitch, unless it's a zombie apocalypse, then you want to see a whole new level. That's a different thing.
Yes. I think it should do zombie everything. What I mean, like, let's make a zombie apocalypse movie like out of Excalibur. Dude finds a sword.
The only the sword kills zombies. Bro. Boom. I mean, I just made a million bucks.
Where's my producer? So how do you want to wrap this baby up? Well, to be honest with you, I personally enjoy doing our little quizzes and questionnaires. Yeah, man.
It's fun. I have found a it's like dude, guys. No, exactly. I found an Excalibur quiz based on the movie Excalibur and the book by Mallory.
Mort the author. So it can kind of combine like your favorite and my favorite. OK. So we're going to do 15 questions, multiple choice.
I'll read the question, give you the possible answers and we'll go from there. And we'll read the answers and score to the end. We'll let you know who's the best. So here we go around number one, several relative unknowns in the cast of Excalibur went on to become big stars, which of the following actors did not appear in Excalibur?
Patrick Stewart, Gabriel Byrne, Liam Neeson, Pierce Brosnan. Go. No, I got to move my my sheets. I can't cheat.
I'm going to abbreviate my I know you're always caught in Homer. Who does Uther Pendragon betray in order to steal his wife? See, I feel like you helped me with this. Because you didn't have to be the answer.
Which of these characters was not played by one of the one of director John Bormin's own children, young Mordred, young Morgana, Ingren, and then none of his children were in the movie. All right. What is the name of the spell that Merlin cast to allow Uther to sleep with Ingren? Oh, I know what that one is.
Same. You don't even have to read the multiple choice. Is there multiple choice? There is.
So there's the reading for the readers listeners readers. Listen, the demons heart, the mist of Poseidon, the fog of death and the charm of making. Okay. Which night is authors adopted a brother?
You have Kay, Tristan, Gala, Wayne, and Gala had. Wait, do that one again? Which night is authors adopted brother? Kay, Tristan, Gawain, or Gala had?
All right. I think that's a trick question. But long before he married her, author was warned that Gwen of the beer would betray him true or false. Yep.
Got it. Number seven. Number seven. King author earned Lancelot's loyalty by defeating Lancelot in battle fairly.
True or false? That's a tricky question. Can we read it again? No, I just feel like that's designed to trip you up.
Number eight. Number eight. Lancelot sustains a serious wound, one that never fully heals and which eventually kills him, who inflicted this wound upon him? Morgana, Lancelot himself, Gawain, or an unknown highway man.
Okay, Doki. Number nine. Number nine. What does Merlin say is the greatest virtue a night can possess?
Piety, courage, truth, or loyalty? Say this multiple choices again. Piety, courage, truth, and loyalty or loyalty. Number 10.
The soundtrack of Excalibur relies heavily on the works of which two composers. Oh, Ludwig, von Beethoven, and George, Frederick Hondell, Hondell, Franz Liszt, and Hector, Roy Loise, Henry Purcell, and Gustav Post, and Richard Wagner and Karl Orfe. I knew what I'm going with. And this is completely a guess because I don't listen to the music, but I don't like go out of my way to search.
You did it. Yeah, I know. I know there was definitely some classical tunes in Excalibur, but I don't know who composed them. This next one's good.
Eleven. Eleven is, which of authors nights dares accuse Queen Guentavir of adultery with Lancelot? Is that Sir Ector, Galahap, Bedavir, or Gawain? Ooh.
Can you list those choices again? I will. Sir Ector, Sir Gahalt, Sir Bedavir, or Gawain? Number 12, when Guentavir's honor is challenged, she needs a champion to defend her honor, who is the only one willing to serve as her champion?
Sir, is it author, Percival, Bors, or Yveen? Oh, yeah, we didn't even talk about King Bors. Number 13, how does author get Excalibur back just before the final battle against Morgan? And what's funny is we talked about that.
The answers are, Percival finds it and returns it to him. It returns magically when he drinks from the Holy Grail. Guentavir gives it to him, or it's back in the same stone from whence he drew it. From whence he drew it.
Fourteen. Who appears to author in a dream the night before the climactic battle? Oh, his mother, Ingren, his father, Uther, Merlin, or St. George.
Or the stress is again. His mother, his father, Merlin, or St. George. Interesting.
I think go with that one. Last question. Who is the last character seen holding Excalibur? Ooh, the lady of the lake, Mordred, Arthur, Percival.
All right. And you got the answers there, hopefully. I do. Let's go.
All right. The answer to number one is Pierce. I broke down Pierce Brosnan. The answer is Pierce Brosnan.
Yeah. Yay. No more on us. Number two, whom does Uther Pendragon betray in order to steal his wife?
Thanks to my partner here. He did the Duke of Cornwall. Yeah. Yeah.
Which of these characters was not played by one of director Don Bormin's own children? Would you have that would be Morgana because that was named Helen Mirren. You bitch. You got it right.
I got it wrong. I'm not done. What is the name of the spell that Merlin cast to allow Uther to sleep with Ingren? I had the charm of making.
I had the charm of making. And the answer is the charm of making. Yeah. I before you read off the answers, though.
I put dragons, but it was yeah, because that's what he calls it. It's like this is the dragon's breath. Which night is author's adopted brother? It's got to be K K and the answer is K.
So far you are winning. Long before he married her, Arthur was warned that Gwynnevere would be Tran. True or false? True.
True. And the answer is true. I wasn't sure. Number seven.
King Arthur earned Lancelot's loyalty by defeating Lancelot in a battle fairly. Your answer, sir. I said true. I said false.
The answer is false. Yeah. Yeah, we're tied up again. Because you think it's a I know the question is I know that I told you that's that's one of those designed to trip you up.
So it says Lancelot sustains a serious wound, one that never fully heals, which eventually kills him. Who inflicted this wound upon him? I think I got this one right. I put Morgana and I put Lancelot himself.
The answer is Lancelot himself. Remember, he stabs himself in the fucking leg like after. Oh, because yeah, because he's like, I got busted. Dude, I'm a dick.
Oh, damn it. Damn it. Damn it. I'm up one.
Up one. What does Merlin say in the is the greatest virtue a night can possess? Truth. And now we're back to even I wrote down piety, which is not correct.
The answer is truth. Which is the tricky. OK, the soundtrack of Excalibur lies heavily on the works of which two composers. I put Wagner in horse.
I put also Wagner in fourth. And the answer is Wagner in the world. Whoo. Yeah, boy.
Uh, 11, which of all sorts of nights dares accuse Queen one of your other dultery with Lancelot? I didn't remember this one. I put that of your. It's funny.
I also put that of your and we're both wrong. What was it? Was it going? Yeah, I didn't.
When Guinevere's honor is challenged, she needs a champion to defend her honor. Who is the only one willing to service her champion? That's got to be old Percy. Her save all it is.
And that's what I had as well, first of all. OK, this is another easy one because you pretty much gave us through our discussion. Oh, yeah. Get out the answer.
Yeah, the one of your. How does it also get Excalibur back just before the final battle against Mordred? Guinevere gives it to her from the memory that she kept after she got done. Sacking up with old Lancelot.
She kept the sword. That's one of the parts of the movie that I'm like. Confused about really, really, she kept the sword. Yeah, I mean, would you like leave it?
I mean, if she knew where it was, yes, I could see you're not hanging onto it. But it's kind of a cool sword. You know, but she doesn't have any need for a fucking sword. But maybe she knew like it devastated author like it fucked him up so bad.
Like I better hold on to this because he's not going to be on the right mind to get it. Or it was just a dick move like. Got your bitch. I got your first appearance at Deadpool.
I'm keeping this right. True, true, true. OK, who appears to author? Take her there.
Yep. Number 14, who appears to author and a dream the night before the climactic battle? I have a feeling got this one wrong. I put it with her, but I don't think it's right.
All right, I put Merlin. The answer is Merlin. Dicks. Damn it.
Final question. Who is the last character scene holding Excalibur? It's got to be Lady of the Lake. And the answer is Lady of the Lake.
I mean, it's one, two, three, four. I missed three. Damn it. Steve is a champion champion.
And only by pure lock in my machine. I feel like he's quizzes. I feel like we did better than I thought we would. I mean, yeah.
Yeah, the music one. Dude, I just I don't think like all the things I kept thinking about when I was thinking about that question was like it wasn't an old score, like the score. No, some of it is. But that's my thing.
Like I was like, well, it's not there weren't any Beethoven tunes now. And I'm like, but some of them were very recognizable. Some of them were very recognizable, like classical music. And I'm like, well, then it's got to be Wagner.
Good, Wagner. I had fun, man. I like this one. I did too.
It was it was different because I like it because you had your perspective from the books. I had my perspective from the movies. Yeah, kind of come together, mishmash, boom, boom, plus with a good, you know, plus I mean, ex-galberts like I mean, to be completely honest with you in terms. It's just a neat myth about swords.
I mean, what what do dudes like more than swords? I mean, if we had the option to just like roll around packing fucking steel all day, every day, every dude would do that. We would probably be the slowest creature. We'd be slower than like sloths.
We would be named the new slowest animal. Because personally, I would have like a sword everywhere I could put a sword, like one on each side of my hip, you know, like on my knees, on my back. Like, honestly, I don't know what your back hurts, Steve. You got 55 swords up to yourself, like hidden underwear, night, so we're.
Honestly, I don't know that if if women were, you know, alive, if we would have just stuck with swords, you think you think women is the reason we created guns? Kind of not to kill them, but you know, to conquer shit. I do think women are the reason why we have society at all. Oh, fuck, dude.
Yeah, if it was just like in the very, for whatever belief you believe in through evolution or I think about that, we wouldn't even have walls, man. Because we would do shit. We live in forts and shit. Yeah.
We would just have like big like wooden and concrete forts. Work would literally consist of like going out and fucking shit up killing shit and eating and like figuring out how to make alcoholic beverages. Pretty much. And probably a lot of fucking jerking off.
But would we? We wouldn't have anything to like gauge like why would we? This thing is just for pain. Well, no, we would we would all be gay.
If there were no chicks, we would all be gay for me. I mean, yeah, for real. You guys aren't going to do this. I'm just going to stop having sex.
Somebody's going to be like, man, let me stick this motherfucker something. Gay for the stay, right? Forever. Thank you women for being created.
Yeah, we appreciate it. We wouldn't otherwise we all be gay and living in caves and shit and living in forts that we built in the woods out of sticks and shit. Anyway, we love you guys. Love you guys.
We'll see you next time. Absolutely. Oh, one thing we got to tell people where to get in touch with us, Dan. I'm going to give it to you this time.
Hit me with where we're going. Oh, you want me to do it? So if you'd like to reach out to us, we have a Facebook page, which is live forever podcast. We also have a email address, which is live forever pod at gmail.com.
Reach out. Hit us up. We're on Twitter, Twitter. We have a Twitter account, which is live forever pod or at live forever pod.
And for real, I mean, I really don't like Twitter. I want to get in. I think we only have like 35 followers because I'm not super active on there. Well, mostly because it's just an endless stream of hate and misunderstanding, but it is it would potentially help us if you know, you want to give us a follow.
I mean, shit, it's not going to cost you anything. I rarely post anything. So it's not going to be filled up with your feed with bullshit. Right.
And I think at one point we discussed I was going to take over the role as the social media. Yeah. I probably need to give you that. Like kind of like get me up to speed with what's what.
Yeah, I can do that. Anyway, we're going to give the oldest guy. The most confusing shit because again, to me, that's just a little bit confusing. Figure out this figure out Twitter.
That's what's important, man. We just want to keep you up to date and in the loop. I did. Where do I put my car at?
Anyway, thanks again. And we'll see you next time. Have a great time. Later.
Later. Live forever.