S4E22: Susan Bratton on Expanded Orgasm, Radical Honesty, and 34 Years of Hot Sex

When Susan Bratton talks about intimacy, she doesn't speak in theory. She speaks from 34 years of marriage. From decades of teaching couples how to stay erotically connected through every life stage. From writing 44 books and programs on passionate lovemaking and from her own personal journey. Eleven years into her marriage, she had never had an orgasm from intercourse and was avoiding sex with her husband entirely. Then she learned. And everything changed. In this episode, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz sit down with Susan for a wide-ranging conversation about what really keeps long-term love erotically alive. They talk about the expanded orgasm practice she learned from her mentor Dr. Patti Taylor — and how it transformed Susan from someone who couldn't orgasm during intercourse into someone who describes herself as an "orgasmic optimizer." They explore why Susan rejects the word "anorgasmia" entirely, replacing it with a single word: yet. They dig into the truth about female arousal that most couples never learn — that women's erectile tissue takes 20 to 30 minutes to fully engorge, and that the cultural script of "get hard, penetrate, finish" is, in Susan's words, "a religiously repressed patriarchal female oppression strategy that is no longer working." They talk about scheduled intimate dates (Susan and her husband have them two to six times a week), radical honesty as the foundation of a 34-year marriage, and why turn-on isn't just about sex — it's a life force that spills into everything. Susan also shares her ten intimacy principles — including the one she calls the most important of them all: practicing radical honesty. If you've ever wondered whether long-term love and erotic aliveness can coexist — Susan is the proof, and this episode is the playbook. Susan is a champion and advocate for all those who desire ageless intimacy. She is a best-selling author and publisher of 44 books and programs including Sexual Soulmates, Relationship Magic, Revive Her Drive, The Steamy Sex Ed® Video Collection, Ravish Him, Dirty Talk, The Pumping Guide and Thrust In Time. She’s the official company spokesperson for GAINSWave®  and TheDr. Joel Kaplan Company. She serves as Chief Advocacy Officer of ProDxHealth.org STI testing. Susan has been a featured guest on over 1,000 podcasts and TV shows, including: Diary of a CEO, You Are Not Broken, Sex with Emily, The Human Upgrade with Dave Asprey, GoodMoms Bad Choices, HealThyself, IDIOT with Laura Clery, The Infamous “Clit Camp” Music Video, LuvBites with Dr. Tara, and The Chalene Show. Her books and interviews have helped millions take control of their sexual joy. Her message resonates across gender and age because it’s rooted in agency, body literacy, and connection. Susan Bratton | "Intimacy Expert to Millions ” CEO, Better Lover · Personal Life Media · The20 Susan has spent over two decades doing something censorship and shame have long tried to silence: teaching people the pleasure-based sex education they never received.  She is the world's most prolific sex educator and author of 44 books and programs.  Her newsletters, Better Lover, Personal Life Media, The20, and Longevity Wins, reach 300,000 readers, and her precision sexual vitality supplements are formulated on the science of blood flow and desire. SusanBratton.com BetterLover.com Personal Life Media, Inc.The20, LLC.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.