Said & Done! episode artwork

EPISODE · Oct 23, 2023 · 16 MIN

Said & Done!

from Habits 2 Goals: The Habit Factor® Podcast with Martin Grunburg · host Martin Grunburg

“No man is free who cannot command himself.” ~PythagorasThis Habits 2 Goals episode is FREE for ALL subscribers. To act according to your intentions…Arguably, it’s the crux of the entire personal development industry.How often have you said, “I’m going to…” Only to find, a week, month, or year later, “it” never transpired.Why?There are three main reasons.Reason One: PAIN.Chances are that the task at hand involved some pain; emotional, physical, mental, etc.Humans are wired to avoid pain and seek pleasure.PAIN versus PLEASURE: It’s a perpetual war that is being waged internally.Humans will go to great lengths to avoid pain, naturally.The challenge is that growth and personal development, lie on the other side of challenge and pain. Learning is painful, yet we become smarter as a result of the effort. Lifting weights is painful, yet the effort makes us stronger.How do we reconcile this? Well, the answer is fairly simple.In fact, the answer has been known for millennia and apparently, science has affirmed it recently.“If you wish to be a good writer, write. If you wish to be a great speaker, speak. If you wish to be a skilled musician, play. If you wish to be a good person, be good. There is no other way.” ~ EpectitusDo you see the pattern?Desire. Action. Desire. Action. Desire. Action!Nike learned a thing or two from Epectitus, “Just do it!”A subscriber to our show and good friend, Laura, has now SAID and DONE a number of important goals over the last few years. She shared the below Instagram post from Huberman Lab.The neuroscience research on willpower makes clear that your Anterior Mid-Cingulate Cortex (aMCC) is a key hub for leaning into undesired effort.Your aMCC it is activated by engaging in behaviors that you don't want to do. Or by resisting strong impulses. (MG: that should be an, “AND”)Your aMCC/willpower can grow throughout the lifespan by regularly doing undesired things, that are hard. ~A. Huberman (instagram)Here’s the short STORY: Do things you don’t like to do, when you say you're going to do them, whether you feel like it or not.Repeat.BTW: That 👆 is one of my favorite definitions for DISCIPLINE.Why did Laura share that post with me? Well, we’ve been preaching and teaching this important concept since the show’s inception, 6+ years.It’s just one of the achievement riddles addressed inside The Habit Factor®.Reason Two: MEANING.The key to doing what you say you’re going to do when you say you’re going to do it is simply this; develop a powerful reason – a STORY about WHY it’s so important.By crafting a powerful STORY – a WHY – even prolonged pain is tolerable.“When a man cannot find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure.” ~Viktor Frankl Find a deep sense of meaning relative to the goal, behaviors, and/or habits you’re trying to cultivate.In my latest book “EVERYTHING,” we learn how it’s the stories at the heart of our “Behavior Echo-System” that drive our emotions/feelings and impact our behaviors/habits/skills – even our environment.Increase meaning; diminish pain.Repeat.MEANING > PAINIdentify and/or craft a story (see behavior model below), that is going to drive you through the pain.Example: I can endure the pain of getting into shape because I want to be at my daughter’s wedding.Example: I can endure the pain of learning because I want to earn more money.Final thoughts… and reason three.You are not tracking!TRACKING AFFIRMS YOUR DESIRE.By habit tracking, you’ll quickly determine if you are sincere in your desire to command yourself or, if you’re just b**********g yourself.Tracking is where the rubber meets the road.Around these parts, we have a saying:GOOD HABITS HAPPEN WHEN PLANNED; BAD HABITS HAPPEN ON THEIR OWN.Most people think discipline is an inborn, innate trait that only a few fortunate people possess.Nonsense. DISCIPLINE IS A HABIT.Discipline is cultivated from repeated exposure at the intersection of DESIRE (volition) and ACTION (willpower) and executing according to one’s desire.Easy Habits = Hard Life.Hard Habits = Easy Life.The habits that are painless and easy, well, those tend to form all by themselves, don’t they? Those are the effort-free, bad habits that don’t serve our goals.Drinking too much alcohol, staying in bed too long, and watching too much TV or spending too much time on social media.Nobody needs to track those habits. They form all by themselves.HOW TO HABIT TRACK THE RIGHT WAY.P.A.R.R.: PLAN. ACT. RECORD & REASSESS.That’s The Habit Factor® method for habit tracking and it’s designed to promote Habitstrength™.And, it’s backed by 13+ years of experience teaching, and coaching.Final thoughts…The more you expose yourself to the intersection of DESIRE and ACTION (and act according to your desire) the faster you will cultivate the habit of DISCIPLINE.The faster you cultivate discipline. the faster you will move in the direction of your goals and ideals.Enjoy the show!~mg***Get the inspiring, free and world’s first, HABITS to GOALS tracking template here: → https://thehabitfactor.com/templatesIf you’d like to understand human behavior at an even deeper level, learn more about the “Three Circles of Behavior Echo-System” which is featured in the book, “EVERYTHING!” I teach and coach organizations and individuals worldwide how to best utilize and leverage “The Three Circles of Behavior Echo-System” and the P.A.R.R. [Plan, Act, Record & Reassess] methodology to craft game-changing habits on-demand. Check out our latest cohort offering, the waitlist is now open: The 28-Day Breakthrough!MORE: “The Three Circles of Behavior Echo-System” / The Grunburg Behavior Model is a holistic, fluid, and dynamic behavior-change model. It’s the first behavior-change model to demonstrate how our thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and even our environment vibrate (echo and reverberate) to influence each other. Hence, the “Echo-System.” Optimize your behaviors – cultivate habits and skills – at will and on demand. Background info here.*Recently Awarded: “Finalist: Self-help, Motivation”International Book Awards: EVERYTHING is a F*cking STORY.Visit https://thehabitfactor.com/templatesTo learn more about P.A.R.R., just Google “P.A.R.R. and The Habit Factor.”Get The Habit Factor® FREE with your audible trial! https://audibletrial.com/habits2goalsFeedspot’s “Top 10 Habit Podcasts You Must Follow in 2021”New listeners, grab your free habits 2 goals tracking template here: https://thehabitfactor.com/templatesFREE copy of As a Man Thinketh (PDF) right here: As a Man ThinkethSubscribe iTunes here! Subscribe: Android This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit habits2goals.substack.com/subscribe

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This episode is 16 minutes long.

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This episode was published on October 23, 2023.

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“No man is free who cannot command himself.” ~PythagorasThis Habits 2 Goals episode is FREE for ALL subscribers. To act according to your intentions…Arguably, it’s the crux of the entire personal development industry.How often have you said, “I’m...

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