Salvage Union: Aspirate Part Two episode artwork

EPISODE · Jul 10, 2026 · 2H 13M

Salvage Union: Aspirate Part Two

from The Coffin Club · host Jessica Estes

"Yeah man, everyone knows aliens did it. Everyone knows aliens blew up the Beanstalk. Check it: we got the Meld, right? Where the fuck did that come from? Wasn't here when we had like, governments and shit. Nah man like. They saw the Beanstalk and realized we were a threat, right? The little monkeys deciding to poke at the stars with their fighting machines and shit. Maybe we'd climb up there and start colonizing the stars. I don't even know why we had that thing. I wasn't born yet. And it's not like we make shit or harvest shit. This planet fucking sucks. So like. Our reach outstripped our grasp or some shit. And the aliens saw us do that. And maybe they were like...alien gods. Punish the wicked trespassers. Anyway yeah aliens did it and they sent the Meld for good measure to finish the job. Like who else could make it, right? If it was the corporations, they'd, like, include an off-switch or some secret shit to protect themselves. But that crap eats everything and everyone. Doesn't make any sense and they're not, like, dumb enough to make alien goo machines and just let them loose, right? They're, like, evil and shit, but not that sort of stupid evil, probably. You gotta worry about the arcologies and resources, y'know? Nah man I'm not saying the aliens are gods. They could be as powerful as them, but like. No such things as alien gods. Just a bunch of spiteful assholes who dropped a robot bomb on us 'cuz they were scared of us. And like. Maybe we were scary? I dunno. I've seen old pictures of what this shit looked like. It wasn't great. But fuck you, dude. Assholes." https://thecoffin.club

Episode metadata supplied by the publisher feed · Published Jul 10, 2026

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Salvage Union: Aspirate Part Two

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