Saying "NO" is hard | 9toFI 040

The Power of Saying No: Boundaries at Work, with Family, and with YourselfJosh and Elliot discuss how to say no to bosses, coworkers, friends, family, and oneself, reflecting on their shared people-pleasing tendencies. They open with accountability updates (Josh scheduling a colonoscopy; Elliot struggling to restart workouts after illness and foot pain), then share examples of difficulty setting boundaries, including Josh’s guilt over refusing Elliot’s brake help but spending a Sunday fixing another friend’s brakes after giving bad advice. Josh describes learning to say no at work by clarifying priorities and negotiating tradeoffs to avoid burnout, influenced by ideas like Cal Newport’s, while Elliot notes that extra effort isn’t always rewarded and emphasizes focusing on the most impactful work. They contrast work boundaries with the harder emotional challenge of saying no to friends and family, discuss regret and FOMO, and address saying no to oneself by limiting new projects, side hustles, and time commitments in early retirement.00:00 Why Saying No Matters01:14 Accountability Buddy Check In03:59 The Brake Job Karma Story06:28 Saying No at Work11:15 Quality Over Quantity15:53 COVID Era Boundaries19:05 Declining the Return Invite21:35 Friends Family Guilt23:04 People Pleaser Guilt24:06 Hell Yes Philosophy25:28 Saying Yes Then Regret27:02 Retirement Boundaries28:28 Fence Favor Fallout31:38 No To Yourself32:35 Side Hustle Temptations35:39 Time Value Debate37:57 Babysitter Rate Reality39:07 Practicing Better Nos41:16 Closing And FeedbackDo you have feedback or suggestions? We want to hear from you!Contact Elliot: [email protected] Josh: [email protected]’s other podcast: Stuck In BetaJosh’s YouTube channel: How To Fix It WorkshopAny of these products help the show. Thanks for your support!Mint Mobile - We both use ⁠Mint Mobile⁠ and save a ton on our phone plan: ⁠https://fbuy.me/vgAmz⁠⁠Empower⁠ is Josh’s choice for Net Worth and BudgetingWanna create a podcast? We use ⁠Descript⁠Looking for a new credit card?  We’re big fans of ⁠Chase⁠⁠Buy Us a Coffee⁠ - One time donation or monthly, it’s up to youWant to save money on gas? Try ⁠Upside!⁠Books mentioned in this episode:Come find us and subscribe on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/@9toFI