Self Sabotage

Today's episode is about a breakthrough I'm having. I am noticing that the "break" I'm trying to take at the end of the day involving weed, sometimes alcohol, YouTube videos and snacks is really just setting me up for chaos the next day. I don't feel great, the house is a mess and I just start the cycle all over again to want another "break" again. Instead of denouncing this as just bad, I try to look at what it's giving me. The insight I found is that it is protecting me from making progress, or having the time and space to make progress on the big questions like who I am, what my purpose is and how I want to spend my life.