Sex Addiction may mean the true YOU never fully evolved and got ambushed episode artwork

EPISODE · May 22, 2026 · 8 MIN

Sex Addiction may mean the true YOU never fully evolved and got ambushed

from The Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast · host Gary McFarlane

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreLet's talk about how well you really know yourself. Remember that the addiction behaviours are all about self-soothing to manage emotions; a time of escape from life's issues for a while. It means that many other life skills for managing emotions such as stress, pressure, anxiety, upset and other normal emotions, may never have been learned in childhood, because the addiction behaviours became the 'go-to' drug of choice.Core Emotional NeedsWhich are your top 3 Core Emotional Needs? Is it Acceptance, Affection, Appreciation, Approval, Attention, Comfort, Encouragement, Respect, Security or Support? Be aware of your top 10 Core Emotional Needs, but even more importantly, be very sure that you know your top 3 core emotional needs. The very fact that we are human, means that we have these 10 core emotional needs, which have to be met. When life and circumstances do not keep these needs topped up and some dwindle beyond our critical level, then we will react, often unconsciously. Fight or flight will soon demand attention when our core emotional needs are not being met. Fight can take the form of creating conflicts, but not being aware that we are being more contentious than usual! Flight means that we move away from a situation, into a place where we think our needs will be better met. That can take the form of longer hours at work because work or the people in the work place bring a form of comfort. They are danger zones unless we begin to read the signs. Our partner plays a part in meeting our Core Emotional Needs, but they are not responsible. They cannot meet all of those needs. All of the systems within which we interact (such as work, home life, social, sports etc) play a part in meeting those needs, not one person only. In the survey to determine the top 10 Core Emotional Needs, most women can identify with the need for Security within their top 3. Most men chose Respect. Couples do an Exercise with me to identify their top 3 most important Core Emotional Needs.When you have ranked your top 3, try ranking your partner’s top 3. Then have a discussion. What you do not know, then you cannot affect or do much about. What you know about and can see, then you can affect for good – or chose not to – but you now have choice! Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior, psychology, codependency, sex life, neuroscience, sex ed, sober, sobriety, sexual dysfunction, relationship issues, sex coach, sexual, trauma, ptsd, sex science, The sex porn love Addiction Podcast, The Singles Partners Marrieds and Long Time Marrieds Podcast, Gary McFarlane, porn addiction, Support the show

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Let's talk about how well you really know yourself. Remember that the addiction behaviours are all about self-soothing to manage emotions; a time of escape from life's issues for a while. It means that many other life skills for managing emotions such as stress, pressure, anxiety, upset and other normal emotions, may never have been learned in childhood, because the addiction behaviours became the 'go-to...

NOW PLAYING

Sex Addiction may mean the true YOU never fully evolved and got ambushed

0:00 8:30

No transcript for this episode yet

We transcribe on demand. Request one and we'll notify you when it's ready — usually under 10 minutes.

Frequently Asked Questions

How long is this episode of The Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast?

This episode is 8 minutes long.

When was this The Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast episode published?

This episode was published on May 22, 2026.

What is this episode about?

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreLet's talk about how well you really know yourself. Remember that the addiction behaviours are all about self-soothing to manage emotions; a time of escape from...

Can I download this The Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast episode?

Yes, you can download this episode by clicking the download button on the episode player, or subscribe to the podcast in your preferred podcast app for automatic downloads.
URL copied to clipboard!