Should There Be Marital Equity? (Special Podcast Highlight)

Timmerie talks about a viral rant from influencer Paige Connell: a mom, wife, and full-time working woman who aired out her frustrations online. And yep, she admits that she thought about divorce. Over what, you ask?   The dishwasher. The trash. And kids' backpacks.   But hang tight, because this conversation is about way more than chores.   Check out the whole episode!     The Mental Load Is Real… But Let’s Unpack It   Paige’s viral video blew up because so many women felt it: the overwhelm, the exhaustion, the invisible to-do list that’s constantly running in your head like a browser with 27 open tabs.    She shared how, despite having a good husband (like, objectively... a helpful, kind, involved dad), she still felt unseen and completely burned out. She became the project manager of her home, and it crushed her. One day she snapped: “I can’t do it all!”   Honestly, she’s not wrong to feel the weight. But...     Timmerie & Devin Schadt's Take   Timmerie brings in Devin Schadt, founder of Fathers of St. Joseph, to give the Catholic hot take.   Marriage Isn’t About “Equity”.  It’s About Sacrifice   Modern feminism says: everything needs to be 50/50. Equal chore charts. Equal mental load. Equal everything.   Catholic teaching says: umm, nope. Marriage isn’t math... it’s a mission. Sometimes one gives 20%, the other gives 80%. It’s messy, but it’s sacred.   And equity doesn't work when people have different capacities, seasons, or actual roles.   The Perceived Problem vs. Reality   Paige’s husband was helping. But he wasn’t anticipating or planning the way she did, so she felt disrespected.   Devin points out: she didn’t want just help. She wanted him to read her mind, project-manage the house, and know what she needed without being told.   That’s not partnership... it’s pressure.     The Social Media Landscape   Devin doesn’t mince words: blasting your spouse online is a total fail.    Paige basically emasculated her husband in front of millions.   She turned a cry for help into a public shaming moment... and that’s not love. That’s venting turned viral.   Real respect is saying, "I believe in you. I know you can do this.” That’s what lifts men up and actually inspires them to step up more.      And Now, the Deeper Stuff…   We're in a culture that worships comfort and runs from sacrifice.   People bail on marriage when it gets hard, thinking they can find someone better.   Catholic marriage is unitive, procreative, and redemptive. It’s designed to purify us from selfishness and lead us to heaven.   Devin says this:   “The pain of loving someone sacrificially… is the pain of selfishness leaving the soul.”     Final Thoughts from Timmerie & Devin:   Ladies, your worth is not in your ability to do it all.   Men, you’re called to serve heroically, not just “help out.”   Marriage isn’t about keeping score... it’s about laying your life down.   Kids are not just a task to be accomplished. They’re eternal souls we’re forming. They need us, not just our productivity.     This episode is for anyone who’s ever felt stretched too thin in marriage or parenting. It’s a wake-up call to stop chasing Pinterest-perfect balance and start living out the messy, beautiful, sacrificial love that Christ modeled.   So… what’s your take? Ever felt the “mental load”? Do you think marriage should be “equal,” or something better?   Share this with a friend who’s drowning in laundry and wondering if they're the only one.