Smiling with the IT Privacy and Security Weekly Update for March 29th, 2022

Ooh… this week we start with rich creamy chocolate and end with a little smile. In between those pleasurable bookends, we get an update on the Lapsus$ soap opera before the movie rights are sold to Hollywood. We learn about printers being hacked to spread the news, and the astounding number and diversity of attacks on communications across Ukraine. We get an update on a tech exodus and a new targeted ad campaign from the FBI. Finally, there’s a new “adopt an FSB agent program” with glittering tips on how you can find your own. This is the best IT Privacy and Security weekly update yet. Let’s roll! Swiss roll! For a complete transcript of this podcast head to discuss.daml.com oh... and the jokes... What did the moderator say to kick off the IT speed dating session? “Singles, sign on!” What do you call a turtle that surfs the dark web? A TOR-toise What do you call an excavated pyramid Unencrypted. If girls are made of sugar, spice, and everything nice, and boys are made of slime, snails, and puppy-dog tails, what’s the cloud made from? Linux servers, mostly. What do you call a group of math and science geeks at a party? Social engineers. What’s the best way to catch a runaway robot? Use a botnet. Why did the programmer leave the camping trip early? There were too many bugs. What do you tell a hacker after a bad breakup? There are plenty of phish in the sea! Did you hear about the computer that kept rebooting? It was terminal. Why did the band never get a gig? It was called 1023MB. and finally… One day, I started to whisper, so my wife asked me why I was whispering, I told her I didn’t want Mark Zuckerberg to hear us. I laughed. My wife laughed. Alexa laughed. Siri laughed....