So, conflict management in five minutes. This is the daily historical spot gas with Anthony Fungina. Dorothy Thompson and I quote, Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the presence of creative alternatives for responding to conflict. Alternatives to passive or aggressive responses, alternatives to violence.
Conflict management in five minutes. Here we go. Resolve it. Resolve.
That conflict are recognized to conflict and rest. Step back. If you realize that the conflict is not healthy and needs to be managed, recognize it. I've knowledge it.
If one of you is already eyeing something in the kitchen, it's sharp and it's time to pause. Well, if the item has been secured by the other party, don't just recognize it, rest, recognize it and run. Horror's man. And I quote, Do not think of knocking out another person's brains because he differs in opinion from you.
It would be as rational to knock yourself on the head because you differ from yourself 10 years ago. And quote, wow. Recognize the conflict. You can respond without losing.
To every situation. What I mean is without losing it. That's what I mean, right? By his grace, Matthew 53842, in your anger, do not sin.
Right? Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. But that will require you stepping back, recognizing the conflict and rest. Number two, extend forgiveness.
Conflict management 101 in five minutes. Here we go. Just a few more minutes to go. Extend forgiveness or seek it depending on the situation.
Start again. I'm a clean slate. I literally had to set aside my hurt for having been ignored by reminding myself of the larger goal of this person's transformation and the value of overcoming the conflict to the entire team I was involved in. Even if you have to forgive, forgive every hour.
Extend forgiveness. Number three, set ground rules for resolution. So after I recognize it, I extend forgiveness or ask for it. And then I set ground rules.
We set ground rules for resolution. No screaming, right? Take breaks if needed. Distinguished fact from opinion.
Stay away from the kitchen with brand new knives. Pray and seek the presence of the prince of peace. Here's something really helpful to consider. When preparing to resolve conflict, mindful of the unique combination of the approaches we call imposing and avoiding.
Sometimes you're imposing. Sometimes you're avoiding, right? Think about this. As we think of how to go about the approach to number three.
If both are avoiding the issue, if there is to be any hope, someone has to choose to initiate it. That's the first thing that has to happen. Now, if both are imposing, you know, kind of aggressive. The other one is passive, right?
If both are imposing, both should prepare well. Both should participate. Both should agree on ground rules. Now, here's another situation.
If you are the one avoiding kind of passive and the other is imposing kind of aggressive, you should be ready with a list of your non-negotiables, right? So you're not easily swayed. Are you following? So think about these strategies.
Now, if you are the imposing one, you're the aggressive one and the other is avoiding and you're about to go into a conflict management scenario, give the person the permission to remind you, right? If you are being too imposing and aggressive, right, and give the other party equal airtime, listen. If you are more than two parties seeking resolution, assign rules and identify, identify a fair process, you will all stick with, right, throughout the conflict resolution journey. Let me cross Chris Jami.
You have to lift a person up before you can really put them in their place. Ooh, I like that. And cool. So number one, you have to recognize the conflict.
Number two, extend forgiveness. Number three, send ground rules. Number four, open up. Now, the discussion on what desired ends of the conflict.
Identify individual and shared needs. Okay, we're talking about what we really want here. We're not talking about solutions. What are the needs that both long to be met?
What are the needs that is important to one that's not important to the other? See, maybe I just want to be heard, or I need to know that there's still a chance for this relationship. Or maybe I need to determine how much you are willing to give me as a separate, whatever. Open up when it comes to the needs of both parties.
Number four, after opening up, now you look at all the possible solutions to meet the need. All the values need to brainstorm, you explore the possibilities, right, before you. What if we just split the house into two? That's one option, right?
Or why not sell the houses and split the proceeds between us? Or if you really want to spend more time with the kids, why don't we allocate fixed times for them, you know, on a daily basis? Or if you really want to spend more time with the kids, why don't we allocate fixed times for them, you know, on a daily basis? Or maybe we should just divide the work, right?
And share based on competency. Doesn't have to be or minus have to be all yours. Look at the possible solutions. It's number five, number six, vote.
Vote or choose for your shared solution. Among the different options, what's the plan of action? And finally, number seven, execute as agreed and evaluate as well as needed to perfect the agreed plan of action. R is two.
You're getting this word. Have you recognized the conflict? E is to extend forgiveness or to seek it. S is to set ground rules.
O is to open up on the desired ends, right, or needs. And then you have five, look at all the possible solutions. Number six, vote for the shared solution. Number seven, execute as agreed and evaluate as needed.
R-E-S-O-L-V-E. Resolve. Resolve it now and do it quickly. Now we close with this quote from James chapter one, 19 to 20, mighty brothers and sisters, take note of this.
Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.