Why men pull away after sex?

This week, Shaun comes to you solo from Seoul, South Korea, for an episode that’s part travel diary, part dating debrief, and part emotional field note from the road.After a muted-mic false start, a pastry reset, and some solo wandering, Shaun reflects on the strange clarity that can come when you’re alone in a new city. From there, he answers listener questions about sex, desire, independence, receiving love, and the confusing ways intimacy can stir up old survival patterns.In one question, Shaun unpacks why someone might seem interested before sex, only to pull away after intimacy happens. Maybe desire was running the show all along. Or maybe something deeper is at play, like the Madonna-whore split, where someone struggles to hold another person as both sexually desirable and emotionally worthy.He also responds to a listener who has built a deeply independent life — running a business, raising two boys, buying her own car — but struggles to receive love, compliments, or support. Shaun validates the strength it took to become that self-reliant, while gently naming that independence can also be a survival mechanism. Receiving, he says, doesn’t mean giving up your power. It starts with baby steps: letting in a compliment, asking for help, trusting safe people slowly, and noticing what happens inside when you don’t have to do everything alone.If you’ve ever been alone in a beautiful city, wondered why the “chemistry” suddenly disappeared, or struggled to let love in because you’ve had to hold everything together yourself, this one’s for you.In this episode:Why Shaun is solo in SeoulTravel, solitude, and the thoughts that catch up with youWhy someone might lose interest after sexWhen desire is driving the connectionThe Madonna-whore split, explained simplyWhy receiving love can feel uncomfortableIndependence as a survival mechanismGiving energy vs. receiving energyAsking for help without losing your strengthHow trust is built slowly, with safe peopleLinks:Paradise Band (Kasima's birthday band) — Spotify and InstagramNeedles Tattoo Studio, Hongdae — Jackpot + Red LipCulinary Backstreets Food Tour Seoul Last week's episode with Laura Griffith https://youtu.be/fXm0bi-rZeE?si=l0TD9ZOiqCMcFoGpVoicemail line: 415-494-9559Email: [email protected] submit a guest, please do so here: https://shaungalanos.com/podcast/If you’re listening on Spotify or watching on YouTube, please leave a comment. Shaun loves hearing from you. And leave a review wherever you listen.Connect with Shaun:Love Camp: https://shaungalanos.substack.com/p/summer-camp-isnt-just-for-kids-loveRetreats and latest offerings: ⁠https://bit.ly/m/thelovedrive⁠Read my blog: ⁠https://shaungalanos.substack.com⁠The Love Drive Podcast: ⁠https://shaungalanos.com/podcast/⁠Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/thelovedrive/⁠More About Shaun: ⁠https://shaungalanos.com/about/⁠Buy me a coffee: ⁠https://buymeacoffee.com/thelovedrive⁠