Right in the thing. Yeah, location matters more than power in our experience. Alright, so you gotta do this, turn the hips, if I remember correctly. Oh yeah, you went to it.
One of the best straight-mole dojos. Alright, here we go. Oh, geez. And we give it all.
I've got the hornages and your mother on fire. Oh baby, you're taking two times to the jump. Complete not a nice, bloody a nice one. And I know.
But we all have it. Unacceptable. I need to finish. You can't do it.
Can we still say blue balls on YouTube? That's what I just got. Ah, man. Ah, no.
I'm so sorry, everybody. I'm so sorry to my guests. He's his Cheyos here. We can't do it again.
I don't do that. I'm not doing it. That's how we do it. This is how it goes.
That's right. Ladies and gentlemen, every time you've watched this, and I sing that song, it is that good. Every first, I'm like Robert Johnson. You know Robert Johnson?
He sold his soul to the devil, and then he went into the recording studio and he recorded the Crossroads and every track on that album that influenced Rock and Roll to exist because of Satan. He recorded every single one of those first try. Maybe no. One of them, he did it twice, but he did a whole album.
Ready? Here's my next song. Go. Do do do do do do do do do do, and then blah blah blah.
And then he's like, okay, you got that one? Okay, here comes my next one. He did a whole album. It did help.
Don't do it. That God, every one of the songs were... Shut up! They're not.
They're completely shut up. It's not like that. Many, many riffs. Riff.
Now I got the soggy sandwich blues. Riffage. One, two, three. Hey, is this a you in the music and if you have what kind of music do you know what I just talked about?
Do you know what I just talked about? A little bit, but not really. But I will say, you know what kind of stuff I'm into? The intro song that just happened.
I don't know what that was, but I love it. Is that Rock and Roll? Yeah, I'd say that's classic. Or every metal.
Early metal. Deep purple fog hat. Do you like... I love what just happened.
Do you like deep purple and stuff like that? Or... No, I mean, I like a little bit of everything. It's like, and I think I had my, you know, slip knot phase in high school.
I was like so into it. Yeah. Explored a little bit of it. It's like more in the Spanish, like a Spanish country also wraps.
Spanish country. Yeah. I didn't even know what that is. Yeah, it's like regional music is what they call it really.
It's a stuff that I grew up with like Corridos, if you will. I don't know if you were familiar with Corridos. It's more of like a, I don't know, it's like storytelling. You know, kind of folks storytelling.
I'm always like into anything that can tell a good story. But it's like your Chilino Sanchez of the world, which is like our Mexican Sinatra's. Yeah. Yeah, kind of like that if you can like it.
It's like Mark Anthony, does that count? Sure. Yeah, I mean, it's all good. I know it because I have my boxing coach.
He, he's, he's Cuban, right? Yeah. And he's plays like all that kind of stuff. But then he showed me a lot of Spanish music because he's like if you learn how to dance, like salsa dance, it helps your footwork.
So I would do footwork patterns and then I would do a salsa dancing lesson in the boxing ring. Oh, really? All the time. And then whenever we would hit pads, you know, I hit pads for a round and then when the bell ends, I get a little time to rest before I have to hit pads again.
And he would always salsa dance with his mitts on in between. Oh, and I would, and I would, I wanted to dance with him, but I was so tired that I couldn't. And that's when I, if you get in shape, your area, salsa dance in between rounds and still get your heart rate down because it's not very physical, right, but it's just like, I don't want to move right now. I want to get air in my lungs.
It's very demoralizing to your opponent when you have that in between rounds. That was going to be my plan. But Lewis, if he made it a round, I was going to do some salsa dance. Imagine fighting him when you go to the corner and drinking water.
You see somebody just kind of grooving. You're like, oh, this is not good. That's the plan. Oh my God.
He's lucky. He got out of that. Turkey may be great on sandwiches, but there's a better way to break your bad habits. We're not talking about some weird mind voodoo from your crazy neighbor or hypnosis.
We're talking about our sponsor, Fume, Pronounce, Fume, F-U-M. It's got a little wiggly thing above the ear. An ool out. Yeah.
I love those. And they look at the problem in a different way. Not everything in a bad habit is wrong. So instead of a drastic, uncomfortable change, why not just remove the bad from your habit?
Fume is an innovative, award-nominated device that does just that instead of electronics Fume is completely natural instead of a vapor. Fume uses flavored air. And instead of harmful chemicals, Fume uses all natural delicious flavors. I will vouch for that.
They are delicious flavored air. You get it. Instead of bad, Fume is good. It's a habit you're free to enjoy and makes replacing your bad habit easy.
Your Fume comes with an adjustable airflow dial. Very easy to use. Even I can figure it out and is designed with movable parts and magnets for fidgeting, giving your fingers a lot to do, which is helpful for distressing and anxiety while breaking your habit. I wasn't sure what to expect when I was surprised, but I was surprised.
But by the taste, it was more flavorful than I thought and it felt very fresh. They're very convenient, everybody. They work good and as a guy that probably uses vape pens too much, it's just handy to have in my little, I have a little, what do I have a bat, little pack bag? Bitty pack.
Yeah, you have a fanny pack with everything I need. And that one is super convenient. And you can use it everywhere because it's not vain. You don't blow anything out.
It's there. It's well-weighted, perfectly balanced and extremely fun to fidget with. The real wood and shape are beautiful. I feel cool using it.
Stopping is something we all put off because it's hard, but switching to Fume is easy, enjoyable and even fun. Fume has served over 100,000 customers and has thousands of success stories. There's no reason that can't be you, bud. Join Fume in accelerating humanity breakup from destructive habits by picking up the new journey pack.
That's we got those, right? We did. Head to trifume.com and use the code JASON to save 10% off when you get your journey pack today. That's trifume.com and use the code JASON to save an additional 10% off your order today.
Head to fume.com slash JASON to save an additional 10% off your order. Thanks, Fume. Do you conch or anything? Do you know how to punch or fight?
I don't know how to fight. I actually took a muntai kickboxing and high school and I was no good. No good. I was there for a few years.
I was able to do the kick in the back because of the sound it would make. I was essentially no good, but that gym was packed with a ton of Cambodian guys who could just kick a bag. It would sound like a shotgun in there. I showed up, but basically I was no good.
I remember being knocked out in class off of a sparring session. This guy just round house kicked me into the jaw and I mean I've buckled men. Those guys just shins on to be registered for lethal weapons. Man, they were sharp.
Did you have shimpads on? Yeah, we had all the padding, but I mean still when you got that much power, this is a grown man. I'm a high school kid. I'd say top 17 years old, but man.
I remember some of those guys because they would fight outside like real deal. Master Omri had this cream or solution that they would put on the shins and they would kind of beat it with little sticks or something. These guys had a knife. It's conditioned for it.
Do you want to learn how to punch? Oh, yes. I'm all out. So I have a punch pad and it's precise.
It's one of the most expensive punching machines that you can buy. It's the most compact one. Sure, the UFC's got a pretty good one. But the Jason Els show has one of the finest punching measuring machines.
Money can buy, right, Michael? One of one. Yes? It's one of one.
It's fair. Oh, yeah. I think you could probably order it. This one's got history.
This one, it's like in Rocky 4 when Drogo's got all the really fancy kind of steroids. This is like the Rocky in the cabin version. This punching pad has been with us for 15 years. It's all hard.
It's all hard. And some of the most illustrious pro fighters and pro comics have punched it. Ooh, okay. Okay.
Okay. We can find out. Yeah, I'm in. So do.
Yeah. I'll hold it on and then you punch it and then after you punch it, I'll give you a pointer and see if you punch harder after you give you the pointer. Okay. Okay.
So jump up. So the hitting comic of all time is not Brendan's job division. All right. Here we go.
I can tell you. Is it Doug Benson? That's not right. I've got faith.
I believe that you could beat a 49. You go to the widescreen? Okay. All right.
So right in the thing. Yeah. Location matters more than power in our experience. All right.
So you got to do this. Turn the hips. If I remember correctly, go in. Oh, yeah.
You went to it. One of the best straightened. Oh, don't you? Here you go.
Oh, geez. What was the score? Looks like. It's a 58.
It means you are almost as mighty as tumbry. Oh, but now, but now you sit down a little bit, like sit a little bit lower and this foot, you pivot like you put the cigarette out and that pushes your hip. So you punch with your hip. Okay.
So you got to think about it. You sit down and throw it all from back here in that back leg. Okay. All right.
And then you twist it and land with these two knuckles. These two knuckles. Okay. Right.
I get the first time. You got 38. Okay. It looked a lot better.
Yeah. I wasn't expecting to hit that high. That seemed like a good idea. Okay.
Here we go. Channel the slip knot inside of you. Yeah. See you fall over and feel like a third.
Push your fingers into your eyes and then punch it. All right. You're like this. You're going to go a little bit closer.
I think right here. Now you're too close. Go further back here. Okay.
That was like a 32. You got a 54. Oh, the difference is only the coaching. Which leaves you tied with.
Wow. You have some illustrious company. Jack Osborne. Oh, I'm a good company.
Twitch. Both my catheter would and Dr. Drew from Loveline. So, so let me ask you this.
I'm going to go to the. You're up. He was ready for it. He was ready for it.
Okay. That's how that works. Also, this punch pad may be a complete piece of shit. No, don't say that.
No, no, no. This thing is, as I said before, spot on. And I believe it was my coaching that made you hit it happen. Yes.
We all saw it in real time. That was pretty cool, man. I like punching those things where you go to a bar and you, you know, pull the bag down and you punch it like that's always a good time. I feel like yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. I never go to bars where that's happening. No.
I just see it on YouTube. Yeah. Yeah. That was when I did cocaine.
So maybe I probably don't like Reno now. Is Havasu in Reno? I don't know. Is it close?
Close to it. I think yeah. I like Havasu. Yeah.
I don't think Havasu likes me, but I like Havasu. It's a weird being a gay straight guy. I hate it. Seriously.
I'm blowing myself up. Have you, like, what are you basing that on? What do you know about Havasu? When I went there for Alistmania, all those dudes were, you know, they all got boats and beers and everyone's, you know, just ready to party and have a good time.
Is that a fishing town or? Yeah, I would say a little bit, but more. A fish. Oh.
Okay. It's definitely, like- I get some boats. Sometimes it's empty. When it's empty, and the locals are there.
I'm talking about those people. Oh, okay. Like I think they're like Trump supporters and they hate me, but they like one part of me totally gets it, you know. We should jump off this cliff.
We should go jet skiing. Look at those chicks with the boobies. That's real cool, but then I got drifting off confusing everybody. Did you try blowing them?
Guys love that. Yeah. I sense that would not have gone as well. It's that's so weird.
We were just jet skiing and now I felt great until I found out that you were a man how all of a sudden the exact same thing feels terrible Right. That doesn't make any sense at all. It doesn't. That's me every day, Michael.
It's not helping you, Jay's work. What about your feet? He's just a nice to your feet. Am I nice to my feet?
Sure. Yeah. I tend to wear socks. Yeah.
That's part of it. Toes are very important. I don't know if you know that. Yeah, how so?
Well, they like run your whole body because you always use those to go everywhere. Yeah, they're part of the foot package. Some say. Yeah, yeah, that's how that works for sure.
They're the most important part, you know, because you got no balance with that toes. I didn't know that actually. Yeah, makes sense. Yeah.
So you know, you'd have what toe would be the least important. Like if you had to lose one, which one would you go for? No, you don't. The little toe the less you use, you know, I'm going to disagree with you there.
Okay. Because I feel like the one first of all, the one that's on the right, needs to push a little bit needs to do a little heavy lifting. That's like the little engine that could. And also, if my ring finger is this worthless on my hand, I can only imagine how worthless that interesting little POS and it's like everybody's a little webbed when it comes to their ring toe.
Yeah, maybe it's just along for the right side. Little guy chakra and out on the end. I think your ring toe is just basically like the useless conjoined twin of the foot. Huh?
Cause I think like the top is the difference between hitting the pad 38 and 50. I feel like that's, that's the. Well, you're supposed to be pivoting on your big toe for that. Oh, okay.
The little toes out of the game. But what Telly was saying before when you stretched just like cutting angles that that pinky toe is like really sticking into the ground. It's like saying the other way. Yeah, you might be right.
It is. You know, the night is in those those toes. Those little pinkies, those are a billion dollar toes. Yeah.
All the balance and stuff of being able to, you know, go for it. You know, you do a toe transplant. Like you said, bigger toes. I'm extra balanced.
Would you add another toe to your foot? That's a good question. Talk about ultimate balance. Would it be or would just bigger five toes be better?
Like finger toes, like long, not too long because then you have to wear like different shoes. Also, shoes would be a mess. You couldn't find shoes anywhere. Right.
But if you had just toes that were like an inch longer, all of them. Can I play piano with my? No. I mean, yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean, ladies with no arms that can like so and stuff.
You ever see that? I would imagine like having longer toes when you wear like slides are completely be. But can you just get bigger slides? Well, you're going to need flip flops that are custom made so that the thong is set for that.
You get that. You're golden. Yeah. I don't like flip flops a lot.
So I don't know. I don't want toe wedges. I'm not wearing flip flops anyway. Flip flops versus slides.
Oh, we're slides. Okay. We're not flip flops. Yeah.
I can't do it. I used to wear thongs. So they were called in Australia and they were the old school little ones. But now thongs are, you know, they try to make them fancy.
That's just ridiculous. It's like, you know, I mean, like a painting made out of poo. I don't want to do. They're not stylish.
They're not stylish. When is it acceptable to wear a sandal thong? Like when you're five and you've got a little heel thing on the back? Yeah.
That's cool. When you just had bung and surgery. Yeah. Your nails done or something.
There you go. That's out of the net. Out of here. Slides all the way.
You got like a toe amputated anywhere in. Yeah. Yeah, tracatac crabs never just chop off a toe. When you're like walking in the water and you bump into one.
They never do that, right? Chop out a whole toe. Like is anyone ever been in a crab accident where they lost a toe? I don't think they're that strong enough to.
They're not. We treat them like that. Like you ever seen one grab on to you or grab on to someone and they start freaking out? It definitely hurts, but I don't think it's not.
But it can't get it off, right? Right, you're kind of doing this number. Can a big lobster probably get it off? Like a big old claws could probably get off.
Or how big does a lot of people get? Have big robots at the size of the finger, right? Which we have fishermen on the show. Well, we've got photos.
Hey, so I don't want to start a fight with you. But I think you're making broad generalizations about crabs. Yeah, I don't know. What about a king, like a snow crab?
You ever see those guys at the Chinese restaurants inland? Yeah. They're like three, four long arms. Pinky would fly off.
Which do you think is easy to bite off? A pinky finger or a pinky toe? Ooh. I think probably a pinky finger because it has more length to it.
Yeah, yeah. This one's like, yeah. This has less leverage. This has more bend than a pinky toe would, I guess.
You've got to need terrific aim to get a pinky toe as well. Apparently mud crabs are not strong enough to snip off a finger. Boom. Oh, yeah.
So there's no need in fearing the crab ever again, ladies and gentlemen. Unless it's a coconut crab. A coconut crab is, dude, they are the creepiest things ever. I've never seen one.
I only recently discovered them. They climb up trees and stuff. But they have the most power in their clothes more than a bear's jaws. Really?
Yeah. Googled. Oh, go, go, go. Not good.
Because coconut shrimp are just delicious. Yeah. Delicious. I think this is different, Michael.
Argan being one of the best leftover foods. Coconut shrimp, when they just sit there. Right. The next day when you reheat them, they find a new flavor somehow.
That's right. They're like, ah, ah. Amazing blend of soggy and crispy the next day. Yeah.
There we go. Yeah, look at these. Look at these coconut crab. Oh.
They get a wrist off. Probably. Oh, yeah. 100%.
I see one on a good bag. Wow. That is insane. Right.
It's like a traffic home coming to life. It's so impressive. It's such a beast. I mean, he does.
No. Because they look like crab lobsters. Yeah, but big crabs don't taste good. I caught a giant lot of fresh water, crayfish when I was a kid in Australia.
So I used to catch him all the time. And when I caught a whopper, I was like, everybody, I got the biggest one. I was like, whoa, Jacob, the biggest one. It tasted like crap.
No good. They're all the ones that were half the size tastes way better. I don't know how I'd wonder what that is. The inverse relationship between crab legs is the bigger they give the worst taste.
I could be. I just know from Freshwater crayfish, which what is that here? Like a love stuff. I would imagine so.
It's like a blue crab or like a blue lobster. How rare they are. It's like they're like one in Australia. They're all blue.
Are they really? Yeah, like greeny blue. Blue crabs aren't like that. That's a whole Maryland thing.
These are interesting, right? But the blue lobster lobster. Lobster or soup. Right.
You find one of those. You get to go to Willy Wonka's Factory. That's cool. Sign me up.
Yeah. You eat some exotic food. I'm guessing is a street taco guy. I thought you had Mark Merrin on your show.
What was it? A spinal cord or something? Yeah, that was on a goat meat. It was what's called bezia.
Yeah. And it's not really exotic. It almost seems like kind of normal. Like from Mexico, especially the region where my mom's from.
Bezia goat meat is like in a curry. Yeah. Very normal. So I ask you about that.
Yeah. Because not a week ago, I was out of Food Truck La Unica. La Unica, yeah. Yeah, pretty great spot.
I got the easy part hard. And I wasn't sure how I feel stupid saying can I have baria. But I also feel really stupid going, yeah, I'll take some baria. Tacos, I feel like there's no right way for a guy like me.
No, either way. No, either way. No, you said it right. The first time you said I already knew Unica, bezia.
Bezia. Either way. Bezia. Yeah, bezia.
It's so good. To make sure you say it's cool the next time you go. No, I'm saying to make sure I don't embarrass you. I'm saying that.
Well, especially because it's goat. No, I'm sorry. Can't say goat. Sorry.
Oh, I'm crab. No, it's goat. Yeah. Go back.
Crab. Chicken. No, goat. You mean goat?
You go, yeah. Bezia me, bro. Yeah. It's kind of stringy.
I would say goat means a little stringy. I like that though. It's good. It has an interesting taste.
Where's the spine at though? Did you say spine earlier? Yeah. So Mark ate one of the little spine, like the vertebrae kind of thing, and he wasn't really into it.
But you are. Yeah. It's good. You don't even think about it.
Yeah. The spine. You even eat like the brain part of the goat. The cheek.
The cheek of the goat. The cow cow tongue. I guess it's kind of exotic. Do you eat that?
Yeah. I've ate that before. Very soft. It's almost like the fatty part of a steak.
That's the consistency of it. I'm going to put some sauce on there and you just eat it as a taco. You just kind of take the rough part, like the top layer of the tongue, like the hair part. The bumpy bit.
The bumpy bit. You just, I'm salivating as I'm telling you this. I'm salivating as I'm telling you this. I'm salivating as I'm telling you this.
You know that's alive again right before you barf. Oh, that way you're going to get it. He's like, I'll give it one of my toes not to ever try that. Yeah, that doesn't sound fun to me.
But anyway, I'll still do it. Which is very interesting because of, it's just a palette. I mean, you grew up eating it and it just, it seems very normal, I guess. Yeah, it's like, yeah, I like weird dishes like that, I guess.
Yeah, my kids are all about the tongue. Do you like it more than your stockmates? I like it all. I mean, give me a good New York strip.
I mean, I'm all in. That's my favorite blue cheese crumbles on top. A little butter on there, you know, like salt pepper. What is the greatest taco you've ever had?
The greatest taco I've ever had. I mean, that's a tough one. You wouldn't probably show one to Taco Bell. We did and he wasn't thrilled about that.
Wait. So on the show, yes, I was showing the first of these. You're probably showing the first of these. You're taking the fucking tacos instead of all the other.
There's reasonings behind this. Okay. So we go for the Poli Shore episode. We ended up going to Taco Bell because I wanted to go to a place that's just as much as like, they're a part of Americana just as much as Poli is.
Yeah. And once I said that, he's like, Oh, okay. Okay. I see why we're here.
Okay. Initially he was not thrilled. And that episode we went on to try Tito's Tacos. Okay.
Tito's Tacos. It's in Culver City. And this is like think Taco Bell before they went mainstream, what that would look like. And they're still serving a very authentic crispy taco cheese that shredded yellow lettuce ground meat that kind of stuff.
So we did a compare and contrast. We had this whole story arc to it. But when we took Poli straight to the drive to the drive to the Taco Bell, he's like, dude, I thought you were taking me to a nice place. I'm like, this is a nice place.
Oh, wow. So that was a through line of that episode. But I would say LA has a ton of amazing taco spots like evil cooks. These guys are heavy metal, classically trained.
Like these guys are top notch. They used to work in like Italian kitchens, all kinds of like high end restaurants, but they leave all that to do. Tacos. And they do like a squid, a al pastor, they do that.
They do like this satanic taco that's like a big Mac. So they're really taking chances and they're not really following the rules of what? Yeah. And they got a great thing going, but there's places like Tacos, 1986, which is like a ada waa.
There's a, yeah, be to La Unica. Yeah. I mean, I'm like like a crazy taco, or is your. I mean, but I'm like, you know, you like, you know, I'm like, you know, you're like, I'm like, what's the best way to get a taco?
Yeah, be like a crazy taco or is your favorite taco just like some stock little cheap one or is the I think my favorite at its core comes to like a Alpastor taco. Okay, like the one on the spindle, you know, like red mean It's like if you get one with the pineapple shard in there is like it's just perfect It's not there's no bells and whistles, but it's everything you need But you know sometimes you want to go with all the craziness of it So it's like shrimp Mariscoe's Jalisco, which is on that same strip as a busy la unica They do an amazing like shrimp salad taco. Yeah, it's yeah, so it's like it just depends what you want to do LA so fun for that the other day like I caught myself I was talking to my wife and I said I'm gonna go get some tacos It's one enough but end up at unica, but I said hey, I mean she said where do you want to go? I said what I mean to try that place under the overpass and I was like oh, they're not there on Sunday I'll say wait a second before I go to Los Angeles that would never be like a thing that civilized human beings could stay to each other Well that plays some you're great things about the the taco Table underneath the overpass by our house and you see that a lot like you see that happening like quite a bit Which I think it's pretty cool is like a lot of these families are bringing their like family recipes So this corner just like a table and you just know if you want this specific thing a sope a Torta a specific taco, you know what corner to hit and what part of town So I think it's really cool because it's giving otherwise families who don't have the means to have a restaurant to have an outlet and And introduce you know the food from their region to people.
I think it's really cool. Yeah, yeah me too You became an author I did recently. Yeah, I'm super excited I got this kids book that I have coming out that I wrote and you know, it's a kids book series And I'm super excited our first ones to do to come out June 6 It's called Papa's magical water jug clock and they're also releasing it in Spanish It's called a barrito machi cola papa and it just you know It tells the story because I grew up working with my dad my dad's you know, you did landscaping and gardener And I grew up working with my dad ever since I was little so we tell this kind of father son story of working with my dad It was like an inside joke that my dad had and you know, my dad used to tell me that he could tell how much time What time it was based on how much water we had in our jug and I believe that as a kid like man dad could tell time And I took it at face value whenever I didn't want to work. I would waste water It'll be 10 30 in the morning.
I was like, hey dad water's gone. We gotta go home He's like no you're ruining my clock kind of thing and he would explain to me But it became an inside joke that I had you know working with my dad from a little kid to you know When we sold the company and you know that story is illustrated here for for kids, you know So I hope people go out there and buy it and Spanish and English which I'm very excited about and you're dad No, what possesses the two right of kids book? I've always I basically grew up in a library like like a library was a big part of my upbringing, you know It's like you know, I often joke about it. It's like I don't know that librarians knew that there were babysitters cuz parents would leave their kids there and they would go do the thing so it's like she was my Unofficial babysitter, you know my parents worked it so sometimes I can go work with my dad But when I couldn't I stay with mom mom had to work Yeah, she had to do stuff so just drop you off in a library and I would just go through all the books I just go one by one go to different part of the library go to this part of library So it became such a big part of my upbringing It's like I kid you not this children's book I put it up there with my one hour special so the one hour special is a big part of like as a comic You want that one hour special but having a kids book to me it means it's like neck and neck I mean the specials like they're right there It means a lot to me because one you know the hour special You know having to come out on Showtime back in 2020 was a huge deal Yeah, and you know having the book now It's like it's a huge deal as well to be able to show that to my parents, you know Is that mean you'll do another one?
Yeah, we got a second title in the works already. That's like another career Yeah, it's like a good I like to I like to think that I'm able to bring my skill sets from like being a stand-up comedian and a storyteller into this Different career like you're saying of writing books and you know using you know humor and stuff like that So some of the jokes that I've even used in my stand-up I'm able to kind of bring to life in the book and I think a lot of people will see will recognize some of those jokes in that book And it's like it's you know the silliness that I like to look at you know that I can you know bring in front of a different audience So how long you been a comedian for what is it something else playing right now? I hear something. I don't know where it's coming from.
Can you check the living room? Yeah, I feel like a poltergoos just turn the TV on That's why it's not gonna be anything that cool You get people in the front yard that'd be weird Was it yeah that Netflix just started going for some How dare they I think mine is finally gone. I think the cancellation date just passed Done you're done. Are you feeling any regret?
Not yet. I didn't want to watch that Adam Sandler basketball movie But I can't pay 15 bucks a month just to watch more Adam Sandler movies I suspect Adam Sandler Netflix has been taking me for granted for something Michael's against Netflix. You don't like it What's good on there? So it sounds like you exhausted what you watch on I just got a TV show on this Paid to make a TV show and then when nobody would put it on their channel Netflix graciously agreed to host it for him Hey, I didn't get it.
How long you been a comedian. Oh 16 years 16. Yeah, I started when I was 20 on 36 now So I'm gonna hit my yeah 17th year in August fuck yeah, man. Yeah, I know I cast whatever what Yeah, I started at the comedy sort so I was a door guy there for a while Okay, part of that whole like same triple E generation.
No, that was that was before me So I got I got past September 7th 2012 Yeah, I got passing for a few years before that I'm parking cars and cleaning toilets Pop in the seating people ripping ticket answering phones I literally would pick up any shift I possibly could get my hands on just so I could be there and how did you do that? Like do you are you around or did you call no? I was around like I can't stay there all day. I showed up I showed up I kept going on the open mic so the potluck they call it Yeah, so I would go and sign up back then potluck was on a Sunday and Monday So if you don't get up on Sunday you go Monday and try to get up Okay, and then if you got up on Sunday, you knew that you might as well not show up on Monday go hit up another mic Yeah, you got up already.
Okay, so I would do that for a better part of the year and so one of the door guys I was working in the back the back door Davey was opening for another comedian They needed somebody to replace him and I've been hanging out I mean I was annoying of like I want to work here I want to work here and finally they're like hey, they need to cover somebody shift We're short people and you were there and I was there and they're like hey you start tomorrow. I'm like great This is what I've been hoping for you I mean so finally I'm now working the door and you know It's a minimum way job, but it was enough for me to pay for parking my drive from Long Beach to the store now I'm watching comedy. I'm learning. I'm doing my hot little three minutes of stage time I'm tanking I'm eating shit on stage, but but loving it.
Yeah, and then yeah I was there for a few years until I got past so it's pretty cool to say that you were tanking and you were loving it Yeah, you knew that it was there's a learning process here And I'm not supposed to be the champion of the world straight off the bat like no, yeah, I You know, it's like I if I'm being honest I was eating it for the first five to six years. I could not get a laugh to save my life and I'm being completely honest It's like if there's any laughs it was I didn't know why I was getting the last it's like taking a math test And you're like oh you got this one right, but I'm like how I just wrote a number down I mean so it's like I'm telling jokes how to the best of my ability, but I'm not it's not I don't know why I kept doing it Yeah, but it's like it's something that I love I was learning I was you know understanding the challenges of what it meant to like write a joke perform a joke But it's like then you know, it's like yeah around like year seven like things started to come around a little more So by your ten I felt comfortable, you know, it's like I still don't feel comfortable I'm still a nervous wreck I've seen you nervous that like a little place before oh, yeah All the people here. Why is he nervous? You're the most Prefect the best one and the one that's been here the longest and it was like a little room.
Yeah, that was a fun show But yeah, it's like I don't ever look at it that way like like you're saying It's like the best one here the one that's been at it longest It's like I'm more concerned with can I get this premise to work? Yeah, I mean it's it I've used this analogy before It's like I don't know if you guys ever played Mario Kart. I'm aware of it Okay, so Mario Kart there's a level where you could play where there's a ghost version like a faint Translucent version of your best time and you're and you're right inside by side Okay, and you can see other players kind of passing you by but it's like you're really not concerned with trying to beat those guys Yeah, you're trying to beat you you're you're your best time And sometimes you see your best time just pass you by and you're like well You just chalk it up to the game and you're at least knows like I should have done this I should have done that So it's like I've always compared it to my last joke and my last joke But I get nervous because I'm like what if I don't deliver going back to it's like they bring you into do a show What if you eat stuff? I mean on stage, it's like then what so I stopped kind of paying attention to like it almost felt good I was looking forward towards towards the bomb if I can bomb on stage is like If I replicate this joke, it's not gonna be the same bomb.
Oh, yeah, it's a bomb Yeah, so I don't know I became enamored with the process I think in that I probably helped you get better faster to run little by little I mean it's it's tough You know, it's like it's a tough gig and just because You know history doesn't dictate what's gonna happen in the future with sound of anything else you can kind of like you know Like a stock you're like oh we project that this is gonna be good based on this is like the variables are very different night after night The audience is different the sound is different. Yeah, I mean so you just go up and give it give it a world Hey everybody Jason I'll show talking about a G1 take it in the morning one scoop in Water and check it in Bob's your uncle. We are big fans of a G1. I carry this pouch with me everywhere I go because I never know When is the next time I'm gonna have an easier opportunity to get there are so many things in this that I'm getting so blind I can't even read 75 vitamins and minerals daily support for energy and immune system gut health and digestion liver function friends If you're anything like us you've been so unkind to your liver for so many decades AG1 is the least you could do for your liver.
It's so easy and best of all it's delicious It's pretty easy to get a supplement that tastes good It doesn't do anything This is everything you need in one package good tasting easy to scoop easy to drink everything you need one today If you're looking for an easier way to take supplements athletic greens is giving you a free year supply of vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase go to athletic greens calm Slash JES that's athletic greens calm slash JES What is the best thing that's happened to you in comedy and what is the worst thing the best thing the best thing in comedy is that I keep getting booked So every week you're like hell yeah, it's continuing every time somebody reaches out. I want to do my show I'm like thank you so much, you know It's like oh my god you want to book me again sometimes, you know I think that's the best thing because I like maybe it shows that I'm doing something right that I can go bring the new idea The new joke and try that and I think the worst thing that that has happened is in companies not getting booked I mean there's no way they're gonna call me back cuz they're you know They saw that performance they based on that and I don't blame them, you know, it's like yeah There's you know, I've I've bombed very hard very very hard, and uh, yeah, that's okay part of the game I guess how are you like and stand up? I love it. Yeah, I feel like I love it more than ever now because yes There's the I'm past the oh, I shouldn't even be here thing, you know where I just go out on stage I'm like I make this makes no sense that I'm here, you know, like it's why did you feel that?
That's because I because I would get shows that were undeserving of my amount of effort I haven't been here that long and because I got like a radio show or you know skateboard or I know Tony Hawk You know people had me on shows and and I was super inexperienced and just like you said like you are hung out at the company So until somebody gave you a job parking cars. I didn't park any cars. I don't live there all day I've done like four or five shows there and they feel they feel a little Unworthy like I'm friends with Lewis J. Gomez or big J.
Oh, because then next thing You know Tim Dylan asked me to do a show with him I'm like Tim Dylan I'm at the comedy store with Tim Dylan. Are you it's not worthy and then yeah It's interesting that you say that because it's like the fact that I park cars should make you feel that Yeah, I mean that you miss it on that thing. It's like your path is different Yeah, and I think these guys I just respect your path more like we in skateboarding. I grew up I made it you know mean with no help that's how you do it sure and then in comedy I'm getting helping hand but now I feel like the helping hand is kind of worn off I definitely don't ask anybody for favors, but I get little gigs couple of week I get to practice at the third wheel and you know every now and then somebody who's proper like Ryan Sickler or somebody will Offer me a show to do with him and now because I've been doing a lot of shows little ones big one whatever And that's what I do.
That's what I think about if I do think about showing all that stuff But I think about comedy I am actually starting to write jokes for the first time this week where it is a set up in a punchline I've never done that because I'm just a storyteller in the comedy bit was always hard for me to I'm like wait so you make up a thing and then you did it at the end of it I'm like man. I can't do that like I just say funny stuff sometimes So I'm starting to figure that bit out That was that's the biggest piece of the puzzle for me because I was that's true You guys especially when you set up and then you bring back to like another thing that you were talking about I'm like man like you do it a lot You're like a pros bro where you bring up little things that keep coming back in the story and I'm like man How do you remember to do all that? That's very kind I appreciate those kind of words, but ultimately it's it's you know The more you do it you find what works for you You know second and your storyteller not you know to go back to the point is like all these awesome comedians that you just named it's like These are like killers and they're looking to you It's like because they're looking to your story, you know It's like and you're learning how to tell your story on stage and I think that's awesome And it's a story worth telling. I mean you've had a bunch of careers in in such a short amount of time You're a young dude with this life experience that another young but thanks.
Well, you look young. Yeah But it's something worth telling and I think I think sure now the work is like you doing any and every show That's where people start to see it's like oh, he's he's enamored with the art He respects the craft and they see you doing these things. I think that's that's really cool to see yeah I love it. I got little comedy friends now, you know, it's like cool I go down there and I hang out and I'm part of the group like going up I was like yeah, it goes like oh, you know, like I gotta you know because definitely the first two years I was just like hey, man like what are you doing over there to my Like you coming in and I'm like is it cool?
It's where I just stayed back and kind of understood like I'm listening to everybody like okay That's cool. Okay, you hang out over there if you've been around for a long time if you have a little time You don't hang out there you go over here and that's funny So so you've been a part of a lot of like scenes, right? You have fight fight scene. Yeah, yeah skateboarding music like there's a ton of scenes.
Yeah How does the stand-up scene compared to all you know, is it a welcoming scene? Yeah, I think so I've heard some people get bullied and some comics are you know that a lot of their humor is mean humor And if you don't get it, it's kind of your fault, but I also see that Yeah, a lot of some people that did your life of comedy I feel like they've got a bitterness towards anybody that doesn't do that because it really bummed them out So they continue to bully thing and those people worry me a little bit does that exist in the skateboarding world? Yeah, so it's not anymore. Oh, not anymore.
That's great. Something happened with skateboarding and they're very Understanding to a kids of air pussies It just seems like people because it used to be vert dudes against street dudes and then pool dudes like you're a dude from a certain terrain And now people that there's still those guys, but there's a lot more people that write everything But even the ones that just ride street or just ride vert have positive opinions about the other it was not a jealous thing anymore Because I think at one point, you know I had it all because it was only there was no other skateboarding then street came and it was way more popular So all the virtues didn't get as much fame. They didn't get as much money and they're a bit better about it And it's funny even as you're saying that it's like I think that that happens in every and any scene It's like you have a group of guys who's doing this one thing and then there's a couple people in that thing that say Hey, I'm gonna do some different and then there's another group that forms and I'm gonna do some different so I think there's an ever Ever so pressing like need to want to be different but find a new community within being different Yeah, and it has it's evolved into making skateboarders so much better the stuff that people do now It's insane and the people that do it because it's just little kids and and women, you know There's like young girls out there that are just shredding I would I would have said in my prime in the 90s in the early 2000s that it just isn't gonna happen for them You know like as much as they love it. They're not gonna do some of the things that we do and now there's a 10-year-old That I skate with it is she is she destroys me.
She's amazing and she doesn't even It's like the art is like where it's skateboarding or stand up is like it's like the bar is continually being like like place differently It just with time the learning curve becomes a lot better Yeah, it's just something that happens because when people get to a high level of stuff They can pass down how to get good at it quicker You know there was a time where we didn't have all the terrain that we have now There's like there's things that are so small you learn it there and you bring it to the next biggest version The next and the next and then there's the foam pits and all these other things that you can do to get these tricks quicker Right when back in the day like the first Mike McGill did the first McTwist when he did McTwist He seriously just took off out of a bowl and ducked his chin and was like I I really want it Here goes nothing but here goes nothing, you know and then because he went around we all started going around We're like oh right you can go around with snow in near the same as the first guy that went around We haven't proved it going around would work right? It's right like the first man away to lobster Get him a lobster. Oh, yeah, but it's like with the advent of the internet. I think it really revolutionized every You don't have to have if you just so happen to be good friends with Michael Jordan Then you will see it happening in front of you But now you don't even have to know him you got video of it You got video of it skateboarding you see people put up tutorials before is like if somebody in the neighborhood know how to do a Kickflip you learn how to do a kickflip the way that kid did it Yeah, and he might not be teaching you the right way either That now there's people that can break it down for all different people how to get things done Yeah, I find that I'm kind of giving up on parenting because of that because my kids at an age where he's like how do I do this?
I'm like well, let me think about how do I'm like YouTube is heard me like a hundred guys a hundred guys made the exact same video and I understand it better from them too One of them explained it's so great that their videos were popular and everybody else There's no way off the dome Yeah, that's only one way you're like I'm gonna give up being a parent and just watch these videos or I'm gonna So can every version of this from every dad, you know that puts up this video. I'm gonna become my own version I guess I got that I feel like I got a lot of parental I got parental advice from my therapist And I feel like some of these people on YouTube are probably like speaking the same thing Oh, no, I gotta do it how to approach it totally and it's like you know first and up you look at it's like I remember going any YouTube tutorials. I should be checking out for stand up No, just keep doing your thing. Keep it your thing No, but it's like back in the day if you wanted to see stand up I would have to go to the library and check out a VHS and watch def jam or somebody's And you know, I didn't have a VCR at home So they had the little TV you pop it in there and you watch it and then put it back and you run it out for like 25 Cents now.
It's like Instagram in itself is a whole Wikipedia of yeah of guys doing it You go on YouTube you can watch any special from I think it hurts podcasting because I think people watch the promo on Instagram and say They watch the latest episode because I get a lot of people telling me man That was so funny that one bit where you did the thing and then so and so did the thing and I'm like Oh, that's a good promo on Instagram Like did you catch anything else in that hour podcast because I feel like the answer is no Yeah, I think once you say two funny things you can pretty much just coach the rest of the Yeah What if you did a podcast episode where it's like you do some funny and didn't just blank for 45 Did you just stand anybody can play and see anybody writes anything about it? I feel like we'd we'd hear from them as much as I Only people would notice are the only people who comment on every say I was gonna say that yeah I'd be hearing from it right now So a couple things to go over before we wrap up here speaking of Mystery meat and street food and the like an Australian company has successfully created cultivated meatballs from the DNA of extinct Willy mammoths why bolts because I think they have trouble with making into a fake steak I think the texture of the steak is that's version 3.0. Oh right now We get all they can get the mushy. It's not I should be clear.
Yeah, it's not mammoth testicles Do I smoosh it into a burger patty or you would have the option of making mammoth sliders? I guess I don't know why but I know I'm not supposed to it's kind of like if you got an expensive whiskey You don't put I cook in it, but for me if I've got a mammoth piece of meat I'm having a mammoth burger or a mammoth taco because a hundred percent You made it so much better than what do we just grill it so you taste the raw mammoth like I don't need I'm funny. So they made the meat, but it comes in a ball. Yeah, okay.
There it is behold the past and the future in that That's a AI image. They haven't been able to do that. I know Jepy can they do a little more research and make a mammoth instead? They're working on that the Russians are working.