Stop Saying Suck It Up Buttercup

Send us Fan MailThe fastest way to miss someone in pain is to only believe the “approved” version of distress. We sit down with Liana Lucine, a former UK London Met police officer and trainer, to unpack how stereotypes shape everything from mental health calls to workplace culture and even how we label victims. When anxiety, depression, grief, or trauma don’t match the mental picture we expect, the response can turn into dismissal, jokes, or silence and that’s where risk grows for first responders and the people we serve. We talk about how depression can look different across genders, why anger and outbursts can be a red flag, and why trauma sometimes shows up as numbness or a blank face rather than tears. Liana shares insight from seeing victims navigate high-pressure environments, and we connect that to common coping tools like dissociation and memory gaps. We also get into the hard truth about recovery: timing matters. Mandatory debriefs or forced “early therapy” may feel supportive on paper, but they can remove choice and backfire when someone isn’t ready. From EMDR to peer support to flexible options that respect autonomy, we make the case for systems that protect organizations without sacrificing the individual. We also spotlight Liana’s work on male victims of sexual assault and harassment, the stigma that keeps men quiet, and how gendered language in training can harm everyone by boxing people into roles they never chose. If you care about first responder mental health, PTSD prevention, and better leadership, this conversation offers a clear next step: slow down, challenge the assumption, and ask one more honest question. Subscribe, share this with a coworker, and leave a review so more first responders can find practical, human support when it counts.Buy her book at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0GZDWFTG8?lv=shuf&channelId=500&plpRedirect=mhFallbackYou can find her on her website at https://lucinetraining.co.uk or YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/@LucineTraining and on Instagram at  https://www.instagram.com/lucinetraining/Support the showYouTube Channel For The Podcast