Stop Sitting Across From Parents (Sit Beside Them Instead) - Derek Eccles

The simple shift that transforms special education meetings from confrontational to collaborative. When Derek Eccles transitioned from the classroom to Special Education Director at Filer School District, he quickly realized that one of the most powerful tools in his leadership toolkit had nothing to do with policy or procedure—it was about where he chose to sit. In this episode, Derek shares how small acts of intentionality can dramatically reshape the dynamics between schools and families, reduce conflict, and create genuine partnerships focused on what matters most: the students themselves. About Our Guest Derek Eccles is the Special Education Director for Filer School District in Filer, Idaho, where he leads efforts to support students with special needs and their families. Drawing from years of classroom experience, Derek brings both empathy and practical wisdom to his administrative role. What You'll Learn This conversation explores how school leaders can build trust with families during their most vulnerable moments—from reframing how we communicate assessment data to recognizing when team dynamics are hindering progress. You'll discover: - Why the physical arrangement of IEP meetings matters more than you think — and how sitting beside parents, rather than across from them, signals partnership instead of judgment - How to translate clinical language into plain English — making assessment data accessible and less intimidating to families - The difference between compliance-focused and collaboration-focused leadership — and why parents ultimately just want to be heard and know you care about their child - When and how to address difficult personalities on your team — without losing sight of your shared mission - The power of unified focus on students — what becomes possible when administrators, teachers, and families align around one goal Key Takeaways ✓ Physical positioning and body language set the tone for productive family partnerships ✓ Complex assessment data loses its power to intimidate when explained in accessible language ✓ Parents' deepest need is to feel heard and to know you genuinely care about their child's success ✓ Not every team member will embrace collaborative perspectives—and that's a personnel conversation worth having ✓ When everyone focuses on the student, previously intractable problems often find solutions --- Notable Quotes "It's pretty amazing when we all focus on the kids, what we can actually accomplish." "I mean, it's got to be nerve-racking, right, coming into a meeting, sitting down, and there's all these other people you don't know at this table? Sometimes I like to go sit by them." "I try to put all the psychological jargon away and just explain what these numbers mean—in ways that everybody can understand." "Parents just kind of want to be heard and if they know that you care about their kid and you're trying, for the most part, you guys are going to be able to work something out." --- Ready to transform how your school partners with families? Listen now to hear Derek's practical wisdom on building trust, managing conflict, and creating genuine collaboration in special education. Subscribe so you never miss an episode that challenges conventional thinking and empowers better leadership.