Taking It Personally

One of the 4 agreements "Don't take anything personally." Al-Anon: QTIP (quit taking it personally) CONNECT WITH US Instagram Join: Gal Pal Corral ENGRID Instagram: @livengproof Liveng Proof Podcast Website GEORGIE Instagram: @georgiemorley The Chasing Joy Podcast Website ______ Other Gal Pal Episodes You Might Also Like: Receiving feedback Giving Feedback ______ Why is it so hard not to take something personally?! Everything feels personal because you are experiencing life through your own lens When you're empathetic/sensitive and/or codependent this can be extra heightened We crave love and validation - it's not wrong or a flaw for us to want to be loved Depends on how much this was modeled/emphasized by our primary caretakers Codependent tendencies of wanting to people please in order to be accepted and liked (to belong to the group = survival) - - so when we receive criticism our primal brain can perceive this as a threat to our survival Filtering Negativity/Criticism Brene Brown talks about how to filter criticism Reject it if the person is just on the sidelines (trolls) Tune out if it's extreme negative or extreme positive Pay attention when it's someone who knows you well and cares about you Be Aware of the areas you're extra sensitive - awareness can help you filter reality through feelings When something happens in one of those areas you can think "That really stings, AND I also know that when something happens in that area of my life it usually stings more than other areas" Arenas where we're sensitive: Georgie: Work, creative work, photography My body My intelligence Fear of criticism used to stop me from trying - now the more I practice moving through those feelings the less afraid I am to fail and try something new Engrid: My appearance/body My work as a trainer, my income, and my certifications/title My failures My performance (tests, presentations, Bootcamp's etc) Tools for taking things less personally: Letting things sting without needing to do anything about it People will be rude, weird, say thing that hurt you It's ok to be hurt, the first step is feeling it without needing to control the other person Realizing that the other person is usually in their own world and it's usually something to do with them "This isn't about me" There's almost more to the story you don't know Connect with your truth Do I like what I'm doing? (with creative work) Is there a part of this I can take responsibility for? Is there something deeper that this is triggering? In me? In the other person Talking it out with a safe friend They can help you see the bigger picture Giving it time Getting older (gaining more experience with recognizing how others respond has less to do with you) Practicing not letting it stop you If you feel hurt, but keep doing your thing you will build up emotional muscle memory that criticism or rude comments/situations won't stop you