Talking About Sex

Content warning: Letter 2 includes a brief reference to SA, no details. It’s not the focus of the letter, but I do bring up the context of being a survivor. If this makes you uncomfortable, see the timestamps below to skip. This week on Hello Hayes, Hayes answers three advice submissions about how to balance two people's physical needs in a romantic relationship, advocating for our needs and fantasies in bed, and whether it's okay to talk to your friends about your sex life. (PS: If you have any personal experiences to share about asexuality, polyamory, ethical non-monogamy, and/or open relationships, please tell us in the comments! This is a very nuanced conversation and I realize I'm just scratching a surface in the first letter. Would love to hear from all of you and keep the convo going.) 00:00 Introduction 00:36 Talking about sex 02:44 “What will make us satisfied?” 07:51 What is asexuality? 10:17 Compromise is necessary 13:49 Define intimacy as a couple 18:39 Ethical non-monogamy 26:45 “I want more adventurous $ex" 29:06 Speaking up for what you want 31:16 Unpacking expectations 33:57 Taking the lead & communicating 38:13 Contextualizing being a survivor 40:52 When to bring it up 43:21 “Can I talk to a friend about my relationship?” 44:31 Sharing experiences individually 49:18 Trust in a confidant 51:14 Proceed with caution The Trevor Project is a great source of information and support for the LGBTQ+ community. Website here: https://www.thetrevorproject.org Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices