Tammy's Testimony: How God brought her through Suffering much pain, and Tragedy

anuary 10th 2007 was the day her spirit left her body, not in physical death but in the death of her emotions. she received the most agonizing call that one would wish never to receive.. her 96 year old grandmother had been murdered in her home. A GOD fearing, living, kind lady, gone. she was mortified! Questioning God wondering How He could allow this to happen, and where was HE IN THAT MOMENT! and What did she do so bad to deserve this! Her life would never be the same, this was her grandma's safe place. she wondered Where can she turn to now, and how could she ever forgive these 5 individuals that commited the crime against her  family Well, she turned to what she could physically see and touch, she turned to THE WORLD! she began to drink, party, and fornicate, fight, and cuss! All that made sense as it helped her to feel some sort of relief temporarily, but that still that wasn’t the answerto her underlying issues. Fast forward to June 23rd, 2008, she received an agonizing phonecall from my mother, this time her brother had been murdered a young 32 year old who actually had plans to go to church the next day and turn his life over to GOD but never made it. Why GOD she asked, but this time she felt she needed more answers. As the years went by she started to question GOD about the tragedies in her life and who HE was as her HEAVENLY FATHER. she wanted to know how could she ever forgive those individuals for taking these people out of her life, and how how could she fully serve HIM. Well, after removing some things from my life (people especially) the windows of HEAVEN began to open for her and she could finally see what all of this meant. It was never about her being traumatized it was about her learning how to fully turn her life over to GOD no matter the circumstances. It was about her looking on the inside and finding the true source of happiness, knowing that God will see her through.