Teachers Are Security Guards Without Handcuffs, School Smells | The Teacher’s Lounge Ep. 60 episode artwork

EPISODE · Feb 11, 2026 · 47 MIN

Teachers Are Security Guards Without Handcuffs, School Smells | The Teacher’s Lounge Ep. 60

from The Teacher's Lounge Live · host Matt Jones, Chris Dunham, Zo Johnson

Welcome back to **The Teacher’s Lounge**, where the staff is exhausted, the kids are feral, and the district is running standardized testing like it’s the Olympics…except nobody’s winning and everyone’s crying. In **Episode 60**, the Three Amigos are back to unpack: * Why **i-Ready testing** basically turns teachers into test proctors with trauma * How credential programs are the **bar exam for teachers** * Why admin and “education gatekeepers” * Snacks being banned because districts are terrified of lawsuits * The legendary **toilet seat hall pass** * Middle school hygiene crimes * And why teaching is basically being a **security guard with no pepper spray, no authority, and no money** Class is in session. --- 00:00 – Intro & welcome back 06:03 – Six straight days of i-Ready testing madness 08:13 – Edgy Skate nonprofit shoutout (skateparks in schools) 09:03 – CALTPA cycle = bar exam for teachers 12:11 – Education gatekeepers who couldn’t hack the classroom 13:39 – Snacks banned because the district fears lawsuits 15:24 – “Kids are starving”… but refuse the burrito you bought 23:14 – Bathroom pass system turns school into TSA 23:58 – Toilet seat hall pass: the greatest invention in education --- #teacherpodcast #teacherlife#educationcomedy #teacherburnout #schoolstories #classroommanagement #publiceducation #facultylounge --- If this episode made you laugh, cringe, or relive your own classroom trauma: 👉 **Hit Like** (so YouTube knows teachers are still alive) 👉 **Subscribe** for more lounge sessions every week 👉 **Comment** your worst bathroom pass story (or the worst smell you’ve ever survived) 👉 **Share** this with a teacher who’s one i-Ready session away from quitting We appreciate y’all. The lounge stays open because of YOU. ---

Episode metadata supplied by the publisher feed · Published Feb 11, 2026

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Teachers Are Security Guards Without Handcuffs, School Smells | The Teacher’s Lounge Ep. 60

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