Technology and Trust: On Building the Relationship

"I'm a big believer in boredom…. All the [technology] stuff is wonderful, but having nothing to do can be wonderful, too." Thought-provoking words from the man whose company produces one of the most powerful tools for distracting ourselves from any feelings of boredom. Not only Steve Jobs, but seventeenth-century French philosopher Blaise Pascal, too, understood the dangers of perpetual entertainment, the inability to sit alone in a room by oneself. Given the current cultural moment, a particular arena in which children—and, indeed, parents too—need to grow in self-mastery is that of screens and technology. This week on HeightsCast, we feature a talk given by Colin Gleason, head of lower school. First given at last Saturday's Parenting Conference, this talk addresses how parents can foster the interior dispositions their sons will need to use technology well, and not to be used by it. He encourages parents to train their young sons in other arenas in order to prepare for healthy use of technology. Moreover, he speaks to the need for parents to model the virtues they'd like to see, and accompany their boys in a close and intimate relationship once they begin their digital journey. Colin underscores that trust is not merely a result of but rather a means to achieving peace. If parents want their children to grow in virtue, they need to first trust that they can do so; for an intimate and personal relationship provides the proper culture for the growth of virtue. While external guardrails can be helpful and are at times necessary, in the end, virtue will be the best defense against evil and the strongest guarantee of the good. Chapters 3:30 A common sense convention 6:30 Fostering internal guides 9:20 Trust 10:25 Training 11:45 Let him be hungry 15:35 Let him be bored 19:30 Let him stay outside 23:15 Modeling 24:05 Detachment 25:15 Manners 26:00 Establishing an intimate and personal relationship 26:39 Freedom 32:45 Ownership 33:50 Learning from mistakes 34:20 Encouragement 37:50 Trust Missed the conference but don't want to miss out on the content? Check out the Freedom and Technology Collection.