Tenderoni Hotline #4: Why People Get Defensive About Your Feelings + What Emotional Outsourcing Really Means episode artwork

EPISODE · Oct 28, 2025 · 22 MIN

Tenderoni Hotline #4: Why People Get Defensive About Your Feelings + What Emotional Outsourcing Really Means

from Feminist Wellness

Tenderoni Hotline #4: Hello my love! Welcome back to the Tenderoni Hotline, our cozy corner of the Feminist Wellness podcast where I answer your most tender, honest, and heartfelt questions about healing, self-trust, and nervous system care. In today’s episode, we’re exploring what happens when you finally find the courage to speak your truth, only to be met with defensiveness, blame, or long explanations that leave you feeling unseen and small. We’ll talk about why this happens in the body, how your nervous system perceives defensiveness as danger, and how your own body might freeze, fawn, or shut down in response. You’ll learn somatic tools to help you stay grounded in your truth, even when the person in front of you can’t meet you there. We’ll also unpack what emotional outsourcing really means and how codependent, perfectionist, or people-pleasing habits actually live in the body. You’ll discover how your nervous system learned early on to locate safety, love, and belonging in other people’s moods or opinions, and how somatic work can gently rewire that pattern so you can begin to feel safe inside yourself again. This conversation is tender, compassionate, and rooted in science. Because you deserve relationships where honesty feels safe, boundaries are respected, and love doesn’t require self-abandonment. Got a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: [email protected] Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=enMentioned in this episode:Grab my book, End Emotional Outsourcing!Please support my new book, End Emotional Outsourcing, by ordering a copy and reviewing it on Amazon or GoodReads! You can leave a review even if you bought it somewhere else. Bring your screenshot to: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ for gifts and raffle goodies. Thank you for helping this work ripple out.EEO Pre-Sale

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Tenderoni Hotline #4: Why People Get Defensive About Your Feelings + What Emotional Outsourcing Really Means

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This episode is 22 minutes long.

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This episode was published on October 28, 2025.

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Tenderoni Hotline #4: Hello my love! Welcome back to the Tenderoni Hotline, our cozy corner of the Feminist Wellness podcast where I answer your most tender, honest, and heartfelt questions about healing, self-trust, and nervous system care. In...

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