TERRIFYING: 23andMe’s board, “dangerously cold” ice cream, and the governance US election

Live from an ESG-flavored pumpkin patch, it’s an all-new Terrific Tuesday edition of Business Pants. Joined by Analyst-Hole Matt Moscardi! On today’s Halloween-filled scary Independent lead Director called October 29th 2024: a scary rate the headline game and a Terrifying headlines quiz!Our show today is being sponsored by Free Float Analytics, the only platform measuring board power, connections, and performance for FREE.DAMION1Scary headlines game23andMe Appoints Three New Independent Directors to BoardMark Jensen (LD & Comp Committee Chair): former executive at Arthur Andersen LLPAndre Fernandez (Audit Committee chair): former CFO WeWorkJim FrankolaAverage board influence across 4 boards (Lattice Semiconductor, Cardlytics, Ansys, and Skillsoft) is 4%OpenAI chair's AI startup Sierra gets $4.5 bln valuation in latest funding roundBret Taylor has raised $175 million in a new funding roundOne-year-old Sierra focuses on selling artificial intelligence-powered customer service chatbots to enterprises. It serves clients such as WeightWatchers and Sirius XMJeff Bezos Reveals Why Washington Post Didn't Endorse a 2024 Candidate (spoiler: the quick answer is Jeff Bezos)“Dave Limp, the chief executive of one of my companies, Blue Origin, met with former president Donald Trump on the day of our announcement,” Bezos wrote. “I sighed when I found out, because I knew it would provide ammunition to those who would like to frame this as anything other than a principled decision.”As he heads for the exit, Missouri secretary of state resurrects ‘anti-woke’ investing rulesIn calling for the latest round of changes, Jay Ashcroft said there is “an immediate danger to the public welfare” if there are not guidelines in place cautioning people about investment firms that use ESG principles: “ESG investing opposes fossil fuels, pushes unionization of private companies, pushes radical racial and gender equity over merit, and flexes their influence over who is chosen to sit on corporate boards.”AI will acquire a human form,' says Nvidia vice president (Masataka Osaki, the Vice President of Worldwide Field Operations at Nvidia)Elon Musk's secret talks with Putin ramped up during his Twitter takeover: WSJ reportGoogle to develop AI that takes over computers, The Information reportsAlphabet's Google is developing artificial intelligence technology that takes over a web browser to complete tasks such as research and shoppingJeff Bezos Reportedly Has Secretive "Personal Reasons" for Wanting to Escape to MarsWoman sues JetBlue over ‘dangerously cold’ ice cream sandwich that she says cracked her toothRobinhood jumps into election trading, giving users chance to buy Harris or Trump contractsU.S. stocks could soon trade for almost 24 hours a dayElon Musk claims he can cut the federal budget for Trump by 'at least' $2 trillionTech CEOs hedge their bets and make nice with TrumpApple’s Tim Cook phoned the former president to discuss Apple’s European legal troublesSundar Pichai called him to praise his photo op at a McDonald’sFinally, let’s rate some Jamie Dimon says:JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon says 'it's time to fight back' on regulationJamie Dimon says the global order is at risk–and raging conflicts could explode into World War 3World War 3 has already begun, says JPMorgan Chase CEO Jamie DimonMATT1Terrifying headlines quizYou really like being alive on earth… and then…:Volcanoes don't cause climate change — but it could be the other way aroundClimate Change Even Threatening Greece’s Butterflies, Food SupplyPolar bears are getting horrific injuries and huge 'ice balls' on their paws because of climate change, researchers say DRFall leaves look a little muted? Warmer, drier conditions are changing autumn in ArizonaYou really don’t want e coli or some horrible plague… and that’s when you hear:McDonald's bringing back Quarter Pounder after beef patties ruled out as source of E. coli outbreakRoyal Caribbean raises annual profit forecast on strong cruise demand, price hikesThe Arctic ice is melting. A booming cruise industry is taking advantage — while it can.Threat of foodborne pathogens is growing with climate change, experts warn DRYou are an out gay human being working in a firm with thousands of employees, virtually all of whom are white hetero milquetoast or not out at work.  You’re already basically alone in a sea of bros, when you find out…:Your CEO leads an anti-gay church, and apologizes only because the billionaire ex-CEO and chair has a married non-binary child (Fortescue) DRIt’s your fault angry white men don’t want to pay your products touched by your gayness (Harley)Your existence in the office, not your work product, got your hetero white male CEO paid morePicture this - you’re home, comfortably at your kitchen table, home made coffee, house is empty, on your Zoom calls.  You can shit in your toilet, you can choose to wear pants or not, you can be on call if your kids get a fever in class and pass out… and then…:Being forced to come back to the office but the CEO isn’t there (Starbucks)9.5% of CEOs are ‘Supercommuters.’ But they tend to underperform—especially if they own a boat or live near a golf courseBeing allowed to work from home… for a dual class dictator (Spotify)Being forced to bring your kids to the office because you had two days notice to get back to the office (Dell) DRThese are your only investment options in the world… and you are horrified:Boeing raises greater-than-expected $21 billion from new stock sales on pricingMcDonald’s $5 value meals save third quarter U.S. sales but E. coli outbreak hangs over recovery DRSouthwest Airlines must face pilots' union lawsuit over threatsSubway is seriously skimping on deli meat, lawsuit saysAnd finally, who is the most terrifying victor in November:TrumpMuskHarrisJamie Dimon Says