The All-Or-Nothing Trap

Have you ever abandoned a goal entirely because you couldn't pursue it perfectly? In this honest and deeply personal episode, Cherylanne pulls back the curtain on her own all-or-nothing pattern and helps you find your own. This episode names the trap clearly: dichotomous thinking, also known as black-and-white thinking, is one of the most common cognitive distortions identified in psychology. Cherylanne unpacks the three root causes: our evolutionary wiring for binary decisions, the standards we absorbed growing up, and socially prescribed perfectionism, and explains why high achievers are  specially prone to this pattern. Most importantly, she shares what she is actually doing about it, and how you can begin to do the same.   If there is a dream, practice, or project you have put off because you couldn't do it exactly right, this episode is for you.   Show Highlights:     ● The book Cherylanne has wanted to write for most of her adult life and why she hasn't done it yet. [01:15]     ● How all-or-nothing thinking shows up in fitness and meal planning. [07:30]     ● What dichotomous thinking is and where it comes from in psychology. [13:02]     ● Cause #1: The evolutionary roots of binary thinking. [14:10]     ● Cause #2: The standards we internalized growing up. [16:35]     ● Cause #3: Socially prescribed perfectionism and the imagined audience. [19:20]     ● Why "if I can't do it right, why bother?" has such a high cost. [22:45]     ● What Cherylanne is actually doing now—the Substack, the outline, the chapters. [25:10]     ● Why imperfect action creates momentum that doing nothing never will. [27:40]     ● Finding your own "book"—and what exists between perfect and nothing. [30:00] Join The Coaching Circle to apply what you learn on the podcast with structure & support: https://brilliant-balance.com/coachingcircle Subscribe to the Brilliant Balance Weekly: www.brilliant-balance.com/weekly Subscribe to the Brilliant Balance Substack: https://brilliantbalance.substack.com/ Follow Cherylanne on Instagram: www.instagram.com/cskolnicki