The Canadian Border, Breast Cancer, and an Optimistic Doc

In today's episode, Summer shares a more personal story about her mother's diagnosis of, and 8-year fight with, breast cancer. Last Friday at a doctor's appointment, Summer was incredibly inspired by the doctor's optimism and positivity regarding her mother's cancer. Cancer...fucking sucks. It just does. Trying to cope with the fear of losing a loved one is extremely difficult and there is not a one-size-fits-all. What works for one person may not work for another and optimism may not be the answer for some people. Everyone is different when it comes to figuring out how to handle fear, grief, and the idea of death. Summer uses optimism as her coping mechanism as well as to create a healthy perspective of life and death that works for her. Being optimistic does not mean you aren't dealing with your fear or grief; nor does it mean you are living in a false reality. Optimism has allowed Summer to focus on, and ENJOY, the present moment and the time she does have with her mother. After all, any of us could die at any moment, so what matters most is what we do with what we are given RIGHT NOW; what perspectives or feelings we choose to have in each and every "right now". By the time "the future" is happening, it will have turned into another "right now". We can use tools like optimism to frame "right now" in a positive perspective; or to find the silver-linings and focus on things that are truly important like how grateful we are for what we have and how much we have loved. (Ramblings that might make sense but are ideas too big to really think about right now...more later). Basically, you don't have to fear what is to come because it will actually be right now and you will be able to handle it. Training your brain to be optimistic in the face of difficult situations allows you to bypass the "I hate life and what is happening to me stage" and jump to the "this really sucks and it's okay to be sad but I am also incredibly grateful for everything I actually DID have/have learned from this." --The Book of Joy (His Holiness Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu) has a really great chapter on grief that I would recommend anyone to read. --The app Headspace has a pack specifically for grief that has gotten great reviews as well.