the coolest girl's annual performance review - 2026 ins and outs / 2025 recap

It’s that time of year: performance review season. Unfortunately, I am both the employee and HR. Today I’m revisiting my 2025 bingo card to see what actually happened (and what absolutely did not), and setting the tone for 2026 with a very serious, very scientific list of ins and outs. Expect cultural commentary, personal delusion, and a commitment to being slightly more evolved... but not too much.