The Crazy January Travel Roundup - Travel Stories, Episode 159

Recorded in the beautiful home office of Chateau/ Relaxo.A bit of travel since our last episode, and it was in the form of a 9-day road trip. Headed up into the North Georgia Mountains for a few days and then over to Pittsburg, TN, which is a fancy term for just north of Chattanooga. And here’s a quick travel tip for you… if Waze offers you an alternative route, just go with it, even if you know where you’re going. Coming out of the mountains south on 985 Waze suggested that I get off at exit 4 and take the backroads to I-85. Inside my mallet-headed brain, I said to myself, “I know where I’m going, so I’ll hold true to my route”. Moments later I was stuck in a 3-mile backup that took me an hour to get through.The next stop was Nash-Vegas for a few days, and that lead to a meal at Martin’s BBQ. The CEO and I have dined at their downtown location, but this stop was on the West End. I started with their Mac-N-Cheese, almost as good as mom’s and that was accompanied with their brisket tacos, which was a true taste sensation. Smoked brisket, melted cheese, and cilantro encased in a grilled tortilla. Nothing not to like.The next night it was the Hampton Inn in Lawrenceville Ga where UberEats delivered my dinner to the Homewood Suites across the parking lot. Katlyn, you lost a star on that delivery.The last night was at the DoubleTree Atlanta Airport. Those warm DoubleTree chocolate cookies are still as good as it. When I first began traveling if you were Hilton Diamond they gave you a tin with either a half, or full dozen of those cookies, at check-in. Somehow that tin always made it home less than full.One revelation on this trip was that I’m actually a fan of Bu-cees Travel Stops. Since their expansion into the Southern United States, I’ve stopped a few times but I would drive past if I knew there was a Pilot of FlyingJ at the next exit. During this 9-day road trip, I stopped at least three times. On my Sunday visit, I spent probably close to an hour taking in all that Bu-cees greatness. The greatness goes well beyond their wall of beef jerky and famous;y clean bathrooms.They sell Lodge cast iron cookware. As well as sandals, socks, firepits, and coolers. If you go don’t leave without one of their brisket tacos.My revolution was further solidified this past Sunday I watched a segment on Bu-cees during CSB Sunday Morning from my hotel room in Live Oak, Florida.This month opens up with this - Man Blames “Turbulence” For Fondling Seatmate On United Flight” OK, I’m listening because this has to be good.From justice.gov.Ivan Lopez, Jr., age 26, is charged with sexually assaulting another passenger onboard a commercial flightAccording to court documents, it is alleged that Lopez was a passenger on a flight from Las Vegas to Washington Dulles. During the flight, the passenger seated next to Lopez fell asleep. and she awoke to Lopez repeatedly rubbing her right breast. The passenger allegedly yelled at Lopez and he moved to the back of the aircraft, where he allegedly admitted to a flight attendant that he sexually assaulted the woman. First, you have to love the word allegedly. Second, this is where Lopez begins the ol’ “bait and switch”.Lopez later told the flight attendant that he had a disability, which prompted his action. Would it have been actions if he had rubbed both breasts?By the time the flight landed at Dulles, Lopez’s story had changed. He told the FBI that he wanted to get the woman’s attention because he was wanted to know what she was listening to on her headphones. SureLopez added that when he attempted to tap her on the shoulder, the aircraft hit turbulence and his hand fell upon her breast instead of her shoulder. This reminds me of the old Resse’s Peanut Butter Cup commercial - You got peanut butter in my chocolate. And you got chocolate in my peanut butter. Either way, Mr. Lopez you can’t go around touching strangers, it makes you a pervert, and people don’t like it no matter what you saw on the internet.We haven’t checked in on the TSA for a while and it just so happens that they released their list of “Top 10 Catches Of 2021”10 - Bullets in deodorant (Atlantic City International Airport in New Jersey)9 - Antique pistol (Newark International Airport)8 - Meth burrito – (Hobby International Airport in Texas)7 - Gun belt buckle (Honolulu International Airport)6 - A meat cleaver (Harrisburg International Airport)5 - Bear spray (Destin-Fort Walton Beach Airport)4 - Machete (Reagan Washington National)3 - Fireworks (Syracuse Hancock International) 2 - A wine holder shaped like a gun (Sacramento International Airport)1 - Chainsaw (New Orleans International Airport)  First, if I was playing TSA Bingo I would not have yelled B-I-N-G-O. Second I knew “thank-you Florida” would be on the list somewhere. Third “Meth Buritto” sounds like a code name or some sort of a kinky sex move. Here’s a quick travel tip,  it’s shaped like a gun or bullet, even if it isn’t an actual gun or bullet you can’t carry it on. I had a friend carrying a cigar punch that was fashioned out of a bullet. He got popped and lost a $30.00 cigar punch.In 2021, nearly 5,700 firearms were confiscated at TSA security checkpoints. The highest number of seized weapons ever reported. Of those seized 85% were loaded, which makes since an unloaded gun does you little good. Atlanta, Dallas, and Houston were the top 3 airports for firearm seizure.One of the travel-sphere websites “The Gate”  recently asked, Is Vehicle Parking Becoming a New Revenue Stream For Hotels?In my opinion, the answer is a resounding “YES”. I understand paying for parking if I’m staying downtown, near an airport, or at a boutique hotel. I don’t agree with it, but I grudgingly accept it.  During this last road trip, I paid for parking 3 out of the 9 days, and one of the hotels was not one that typically charges for parking. To pile on with this I was traveling with a co-worker, and I was in effect his Uber since he was riding shotgun….. He had a $64.00 charge for parking on his receipt. I know that parking lots require maintenance, but bake an extra dollar or two in the daily room rate.View From the Wing gave us this, “Passenger Violates American Airlines Rules By Wearing A Space Helmet”A woman heading from Charlotte to Fayetteville, North Carolina was wearing a ‘space helmet’ over her mask. Side note - this is a 118-mile flight, basically up and then back down. When I first read this I thought, this is better than a mask…. Why the controversy? Well, airlines have policies not just on what you have to wear but also on what you cannot wear. Most of these policies are often not widely publicized. According to American Airlines, they ban personal face tents, body tents and pods, personal air purifiers, and ozone generators. They consider this ' recreational equipment’.View From The Wing added - you're supposed to remove your mask before putting on an oxygen mask if one falls from the cabin ceiling. But having to remove a helmet first could cause it to take you too long, even more so if you need to place your own oxygen mask on before helping someone else.My take-away was this was a passenger looking to make it all about them, aka a space cadet.Here’s another story that focuses centers around, what you cannot wear on an American Airlines flight. Olivia Culpo asked to ‘put on a blouse’ before her flight to Mexico. When I saw this two things came to mind - * Who is Olivia Culpo?* What was she wearing?Apparently, Olivia Culpo is a former Miss Universe and a Sport’s Illustrated model in addition to being a quote-unquote social media influencer. OK, I get it, I think.She was wearing a long black cardigan, bralette, and shorts. OK, I guess, and I say “I guess” because there’s no way in hell that I would ever comment on the appropriateness of what one is wearing. Long story short Olivia ended up wearing a grey hoodie and was allied to board the flight.But wait there’s more, there’s always more. While in Mexico Oliva trolled American Airlines using Instagram with posts such as “Please use caution while using the overhead bins as items may have shifted during flight.” alongside pictures of her wearing a dress that consisted of two pieces of fabric held together with shoelaces from her boyfriend's high top sneakers. We’re heading into the “From The Department Of” part of this month's episode. From the department of - I just watched the 1981 movie Porkys and my dad lent me his car, I give you this. Maskless Delta Passenger Faces 20 Years In Prison For Mooning Flight Attendant, Throwing Can - From ABC via Twitter - A Delta passenger faces 20 years in prison after he allegedly refused to wear a mask, went to first-class and mooned a flight attendant, put his hat on the captain's head, and then threw a soda can at another passenger. Shane McInerney is out on a $20,000 bond.It’s doubtful that Shane will see anything close to 20 years, I’m guessing a fine and probation. However, I would expect nothing less than mooning from someone named Shane. Side note Shane is Irish, and as we all know an Irishman is never drunk as long as he can hold on to the floor.From the department of - “I’m the captain now” I give you this, American Airlines Passenger Breaks Into Cockpit, Damages Flight Controls.An American Airlines passenger ran down the jet bridge and onto the aircraft, and straight into the cockpit, Remember when you enter an airplane you’re supposed to turn right, not left.Once in the cockpit, he damaged some of the flight controls. Next, a pilot in the cockpit tried to stop him, at which point the passenger tried to jump out of the open cockpit window.This took place in Honduras on a flight headed to Miami, thank you Florida. The flight was delayed for close to 8 hours as the passengers waited for a replacement plane. I’m not a world traveler, but I’m willing to bet that Honduras isn’t where American Airlines has a hanger filled with their replacement planes.Honestly, in cases like this, I’m all for some tarmac justice right around hour three…. Let the remaining passengers be judge and jury.Finally from the “My lawyer can beat up your lawyer” department, I end with this. “Not Guilty: Passenger Too Drunk To Be Responsible For Assaulting Flight Attendants”William Clegg, 33, is cleared of assaulting the BA cabin crew after taking sleeping pills and drinking three glasses of wine and Baileys and apologizes for headbutting a flight attendant. Mr. Clegg's defense was that his conduct on the flight was caused by combining alcohol with two Ambien tablets - the side effects of which he was unaware.Clegg went on to add, 'If somebody told me - or had I read the leaflet - and it said there was a one in a million chance of this happening, I would not have taken the pills,'.Clegg is a banker so he’s not a total mallet-head, but how did he not know that this was going to end badly….. Maybe it was the Bailey’s that put him over the edge.For those of you that still believe that “planedrankin” is fun as well as romantic, I have a bit of bad news, especially if you fly Southwest as they have extended their alcohol ban through at least spring of 2022. According to Southwest, the reason for the extension is the rampant virus spread. Seriously? You still have contact between flight attendants and passengers as they serve other beverages and snacks. Personally, I think Southwest has gotten used to the reduction in alcohol-fueled incidents, besides they have their hands full with the vaxxers vs. the antimaskers.There you have it, the first crazy travel roundup of 2022. The next episode will focus on things not cheap out when traveling.If you want detailed show notes, links and pictures head over to podpage.com/travel-stories/Leave a message on Anchor, or shoot me an email at [email protected] I always say, travel safe, stay safe, and thanks for listening. 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