The Friend Who Sucks at Friendship: Finding Your People in the Second Half of Life

My friend Alisa told me something completely matter‑of‑fact: “I suck at friendship.” Not apologetically. Not with shame. Just as a plain, true thing.Alisa loves people. She’s a birth doula, amateur cattle rancher, and the woman who became my founder doula during the hardest years of building Pumpspotting. She listens in a way that makes you feel fully seen. She just has a very specific idea of what friendship actually means—someone you’d give a kidney to, someone who’d be in your delivery room—and by that definition, she feels like she’s failed more than she’s succeeded.   This conversation goes deep. We talk about the grief of losing friends you thought would be there forever, and looking honestly at your own part in those endings. About what friendship in your 50s feels like when you finally have time and you're choosing people with intention. About surviving the teenage daughter years to become friends on the other side. And at the end, Alisa tells me something I wasn't expecting: that I'm the first person she's ever done friendship differently with.If you’ve ever lost someone you loved and wondered what your role was, or you’re in midlife craving friendships that are real and chosen and yours, this episode is for you. Stay with it all the way through; it only gets richer.Join the campfire → yeahnoforsure.show | Instagram → @theyeahnoforsureshowFollow Your New Friend Alisa Marie:The Mothership on Substack | Let's Talk Birthy | @LetsTalkBirthy Alisa’s Friend Pick: The Besque Body Oil she’s gifting everyone she loves right now.